HI ! I'm so glad I found this forum! I have two boys already (ages 5 & 2) and when I was pregnant with the last one all I heard was "Wow, you're brave being so old" or "I hope this is your last one". I dont want to hear that again. This one was unplanned but we are thrilled! So I know I will hear "Thought you were done" I dread telling anyone now.
I am small framed and by the time 8 weeks comes I show my pregnancy. I am now at 5 1/2 weeks and the way I am eating and showing now I wonder if we will have twins. Its getting harder to hide now.
Anyone have any ideas how to politely tell family and friends "Yes you idiot I am pregnant and happy!" Anyone else have people act like you are awful for waiting to have kids? ↓
I would just say it with a big smile and don't look at all concerned. I just had my 4th in january and my 39th birthday is around the corner next month. Gosh, I was sad cuz I had my tubes done during my section . I thought I could have had at least 2 more..LOL! 38 isn't old at all! The way you break the news is an indication of how people will react. Say it confidently with excitement and it will catch on. When the first person has a negative reaction, don't let it throw you. Keep smiling and enjoy this wonderful blessing! xox ↑
I agree with blessedwith4, just make it a positive thing as far as your responses go. Since you are so happy, let them see it. Hopefully they will realize their comment was rude, backpedal and just feed off your enthusiasm. If you are snarky, (I'm not, I just think of snarky comments, LOL) you could get smart and say something like:Oh, yes, we're having another one, the first 2 were just practice. Or if someone very young (I mean under like,22 or so) makes an age comment, you could say that you thought you'd wait til you had more than a couple of years out of high school to start a family. Lots of people wait to have kids nowadays but it seems to vary by community. I am in CA and no one would DARE say something so blatant about the age of a PG woman. My sister in Florida actually got one comment and she is 29! I was 39.11 when I had my son and waiting was the best thing I could have done for all of us. Congratulations and let us know if you're having twins and if one is a girl! ↑
Hey! I am 35 and have two boys also. One is 27 months and the other is 9 months. I am 5 weeks tomorrow. I haven't gotten the your too old reference, but I people think I am crazy to want to get pregnant again already and for having them so close together. I had my blood work done and I am not anemic so the MD gave me the go-ahead. I have told my parents, but not my brother. My parents are worried about how hard it is going to be, but my brother is more jealous. He is older but his wife is younger with no kids. He was pretty rude when I told him I was second with the 2nd. I am not going to tell people until I am 3 months and after the nuchal U/S...if my body can hide it that long. I have decided that once I hear everything is okay, I am not goint to let anyone make me feel bad about it. Tell them you feel like a 25 year old and are ready for another! ↑
Thanks ladies! We decided to wait to tell some family who would be rude(they were rude when we told them about the last two) but so far everyone we told was super!
To mommyof boys--CONGRATS!! :) ↑
You should never worry about what people are going to say. If you are happy, that is all that matters. I am 43 and we have conceived naturally with no problems. I have two grown children from a previous marriage (aged 19 and 15) My husband and I have been married for 8 years. He has no children so we feel this is a blessing. I have told my family and they refuse to speak to me. It has been a lonely pregnancy, but I have my in-laws that are "over the moon" with excitement, so I focus on them. Just remember that you are truly blessed to be able to conceive and carry a baby, there are so many women out there that would LOVE to be in our shoes right now! ↑
So far, everyone has been wonderful. Except one of my husbands sisters but we luckily dont have much contact with her.
I am now 10 weeks and showing alot. My dr has scheduled me for an ultrasound since he wants to see if its twins.
Woohoo! :) ↑
hey first of all congrats!!to you.....we are tcc'ing and i am facing the same thing with people making rude comments....on my side and hubbys side so I can't win.....i have a son 17y/o from former marriage and then hubby and I met .....married and had our 2 1/2 y/o daughter......before her 1st b'day I realized i hadn't had a period.....I was on the pill and never missed one.....but i tested and sure enough I was preggo.....my MIL said very rude comments to both pregnancies....if my mother was still here she would be so happy.....but she is happy now she is getting to be grandma to our son that passed away in aug 07 (the pill baby) he was 9 weeks old and we lost him to SIDS.......I had my tubes tied during my c-sec .......we decided that we wanted to have another one so I had a tubal reversal in March 26 08.......we have heard so many rude comments when we told people/family that we were thinking about it and they would say why do yall want to go through this again??? or age comments....I am 36 hubby is 38.......si I had the reversal and told no oneon my side of family and one of his aunts.....and a couple of our friends.......other than that no one knows anything about it........they wont until a hopeful pregnancy is 4 months or more along.......I would keep it from them until after baby is born but hubby said that is not right.......but oh well........take care and best of luck to you ↑
hi momoftwoboys, like you i am 38 and recently found out im pregnant (now 8 weeks), what a surprise! My oldest is almost 19, middle child 13 and my youngest is almost 11 lol and i had exactly the same question as you. I honestly believe the best way to make people bite their tounge just in case they have something negative to say about ur age and fertility would simply just be "I or we, have some exciting news that i or we are very happy about and want to share, i or we, are pregnant and look forward to this".....saying it that way should force a person to second guess what their first reaction may be cuz if it were going to be a positive reaction, you said it in a way where they get even more excited ↑
You've already gotten some great responses on here. I just stumbled onto the forum and found your post. I hope everything is going well. Unfortunately not everyone will share in our joy over being pregnant at any age. I guess people think that you should live your life a certain way and if you don't fit into their "cookie cutter mold" of what they consider to be perfection...then they must show their disapproval. Pregnancy is a wondrous and miraculous occasion as you well know. Don't let ANYONE spoil your own happiness. There's no right or wrong way to live your life. If you weren't supposed to be pregnant at 38, then it would have never happened, would it?
I have to admit that I was a little nervous at first about telling anyone that I am pregnant at age 37. I, like you, have 2 boys and have just found out that this one is a boy too! :) It didn't take very long to get over myself and enjoy being this way. In life I've found that there's no better way to find out who your TRUE friends and positive influences are in your life than going through something like this. You'll learn who they are and you'll learn who to stay away from. Filter out the negative influences on your life and focus more on those positive people as best you can. Good luck! ↑
I don't have an answer of how to tell people, other than just try to be normal about it. I wanted to write just to voice that I think it's apaulling that people would even comment negatively, or say your brave for being so old. Shame on them!!!! I'm 36, and feel like I'm too young to be pregnant... I was thinking that I'd be ready around 38... : ) Well, be happy and don't let others rain on you. ↑
Yes - I hear the same negativity all the time. I turned 39 in June and pregnant with my first child. (Got preg at 38). My pregancy was planned and conception was natural (commonly asked about that too). There is no set age to have a baby. It is a gift - a blessing from God. People have no right to judge. I personally think having a baby will regenerate my youth. My husband is 47 and has a grown daughter. I often hear about selfish I was to place the burden of raising another baby on him. It was a joint decision and one which thrills us both. I agree that people often react to your own demeanor. For whatever reason if people know something bothers you, they tend to feed on that. You deserve to relish in the joy of this, so enjoy every minute of it. ↑
