Lazy Boyfriend

22 Replies
kendriak - March 19

I just wanted to update you ladies on the situation in the past 24 hours. He messaged me yesterday saying that he'd move out in May, which was ok with me. But he came home from work and said that he was packing his stuff that day and going to live with a friend. He abandoned us with only $6 to last me until April 1st. He didn't ask if the kids needed diapers or if we needed money to do laundry considering that diapers are low and all of mine and the kids clothes are dirty. If my kids needed to go to the emergency room I can't take them due to lack of gas in my car. I never once asked him to leave, I just asked him to grow up and be a man. Well the funny part is that he thinks that he's leaving for a little while then he's gonna come back later and I'll welcome him with open arms......HAHAHAH Poor delusional man. LOL

 

stefkay - March 19

kendria, this may be scary and hurt right now but this was the biggest blessing you could have gotten and at the right time. Stick to your guns and don't let that loser back into your home! It's not good for your kids either I'd bet. Do you have any family you can get temporary help from? Are you on public a__sistance because if not, I'd think that as a single mother to 3 children you would qualify for SOMETHING. Focus on how to take care of you and your kids and everything will be ok even though it may be tough.

 

kendriak - March 19

I was on family a__sistance but they require me to go out and get a job in order to get it. For some reason at 2 and a half months pregnant I am bloated and I look like I am like 5 months so there is no way anyone would hire me. And family a__sistance says that thats still not a reason to not find a job. I'm not letting him come back at all. I told him that before he walked out of the door. I also informed him that until he grows more mature he can't have unsupervised visitation when the baby's born. I cant bear wondering if my baby is being taken care of properly or if he has 14 and 15 year old girls taking care of him or her. I know that I will be ok. I got a few tricks up my sleeve on how to get what me and the kids need for the next 2 weeks. What sucks is that it all happened a week before my birthday....Go figure. lol

 

blackandwhite - March 19

Oh lord.. this upsets me so bad to hear this. Mainly because I am kind of in the same situation. I moved in with my boyfriend since I found out that I was pregnant, and I do all the cleaning but that doesnt bother me because he works A LOT.. and he is never home, so mainly its cleaning up behind myself. But I know exactly how you feel about them text messages. They seem so petty, but I cringe every time I hear his phone chime because I know that it's a text message and I know what I have read in his phone. All i have to say is that if he is like this now and he is 23 and in college, its not going to get any better. If he still lived at home I would say maybe that it would change when he moved out but its not going to.. and I know you feel like you can't live without him but you need to realize that you are 27 and this will be your 4th child? you deserve better.. you deserve someone that will WANT to be there for you and take responsibility in the household... best of wishes to you and good luck honey!

 

meha90 - March 28

I feel were your coming from I am pregnant with my first and me and my fience are very excited but I don't feel as if he is ready for this, he seems to be kind of lazy when it comes to getting stuff ready for the baby. He has seemed so different ever since he has found out, I know that he will be a great dad, now i just wont him to show me how great he can be during the pregnancy.

 

Bilmes123 - May 26

wow....younger guys are not better than older ones....and if i was that mother of the 15 year old I would want to casterate him....honestly thats just wrong. and to not give you a__sistance and saying that being pregnant is not an exuse??? yes it is! no one will hire you when they know your pregnant and as soon as they find out they will try to find a way to fire you...its so horrible

 

Aprilsb - March 23

I have to say, I am so inspired by you for refusing to accept him, his negativity and boyish games back into your life. It sounds like he has a bit of a narcissistic streak. I really wish I could afford to donate but I'm super pregnant and living dollar-to-dollar myself. The cheating is just the tip of the iceberg, in an abusive relationship. His threats of self-harm will probably lead to threats toward you, if he feels the first threat isn't being taken seriously enough. It's all about control. Withdrawing and leaving you "temporarily" is just another control tactic. I was in such a similar relationship--these men often don't show their true colors till you're pregnant. Be strong, research abuse and write out how he abused you and pin it on your wall. Could a local women's shelter take you? They would have food, toys, and clothes. 

 

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