22 And Pregnant Advice Please
3 Replies
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Hello everyone. I need some serious advice. I am 22 years old (turning 23 in a few months). I found out I was pregnant yesterday..Today I went to a pregnancy clinic to get info and I'm getting an ultra sound next week.
I've been pregnant twice in the past (once at 17, another time at 21). Both pregnancies ended in abortion.
I told myself I wouldn't resort to a "quick fix" again.. And many girls that are my age have started having kids.. I secretly wanted one.
I knew I wasn't completely ready (but then again, is anyone really ever) and did not take proper precautions. The day I thought I conceived I immediately took the morning after pill (apparently too late)
My boyfriend and I plan to get married. He wants to have the baby. He is older than me and more financially stable. He assures me everything will be okay..
I still have college to finish (not in school at the moment, but still want to go back).. I'm so scared! I'm scared to tell my family. I'm scared to raise a child. I know its a rewarding job. But now that reality has hit me, I constantly think over what's going to be best in the long run.
Do you think raising a child can be done at my age? Should I wait till I'm older and be more careful????
P.s: I also worried about having to be out of work for a while and depend on my BF's income, and my family lives in another state.
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 | AH - July 30 |
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I literally have 7 friends who got pregnant while in highschool or just after, unplanned & all are thankful they have their little best friends with them now. I also know a few who aborted and they always update their facebook pages on the anniversaries of the procedure saying how depressed they are about their decision. So I have a small case study - & yes they were ALL scared, and I am sure it's been challenging, but also something they would never change for anything in the world. You need to start living your own life and stop worrying what other people (yes even the P's) will say, your decisions are the ones you will live with. I have a 4 year old & one on the way - I am 31 & I'm still scared about having 2 children and being a good mom etc... but I need to face those fears & met the challenge - at the very least because that child deserves a chance to do what it was create to do. Peace & love, Angela
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I can only share my story with you, i had my first child a month before i turned 21 (which was 22 years ago). Everything you say you've heard about it being rewarding etc is true without a doubt. I dont regret my decision at all although if i had my choice again i wouldnt have got pregnant then. It may sound like a double standard but having had children later, it was definately easier and i was more ready for the changes children bring. Only you can decide whats right for you... there will be many things to gain and give up/put on hold either way. Just be sure you look at all the angles and be positive about which ever choice you make. Remember that being scared is normal whatever age you are and there will be good and bad regardless. Another good thing to remember is its not just about having a baby... its about raising a human being and though at times it feels like it goes past in the blink of an eye parenting is really for life. Good luck with your decision, you will make the right one for you. Kelly
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It is normal to feel scared. I think every pregnant woman feels that way. But don't let it cheat you out of the most wonderful thing on this earth-being a parent. There are people older than you, working, finishing their degrees with a family. It can be done. You may have to do a juggling act but with perserverence you can achieve anything. Life isn't easy, it is about experiences and how those experiences shape you as a person. Go for it!
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