Pregnancy Info HOME

I say yes, you should wait. You said yourself that now is not the right time. I personally didn't have my first until just a few months ago at the age of 35, and I'm very happy with that. I've had a wonderful life - been to college, grad school, traveled and worked abroad. Of course, it only took me that long, because I didn't meet the right guy until I was 29. You probably don't need to wait as long as I did, but I do advise taking some time for yourself first. Just spend a couple years after college pursuing your dreams. Even if those dreams never really amount to anything and you end up deciding to be a SAHM, I guarantee you will never, ever regret going after them.

Congrats on your upcoming wedding and graduation! My advice to you is to listen to your heart. Truthfully, you never know what curve b___s life throws at you. Sometimes you can never be financially ready for a child or several children. Who knows what health problems he or she may have, right? Listen to your heart, and follow what you know is right to do. Life is too short to try and plan it out so perfectly so that you're perfectly prepared. I'm not saying to jump into it if you're not ready either. There isn't anything more rewarding in life than having your own child, or being a mother, no matter what age you are. There is NO perfect age. It depends on where you are in life, how comfortable you are, your level of maturity, responsibilty, emotional security, etc. Its different with every person. For me, I got married in September at the age of 21. I finished HS at 16 and pretty much had an early "adulthood" you could say, with 40 hr work weeks and paying bills and such. We conceived a honeymoon baby, and I recently turned 22. I'll be having this little one in June, and as long as we stick to what our goals and plans are, financially we will be debt free by the time our 1 year anniversary rolls around...and I'll be able to stay at home in June. I don't think our lives have "ended" so to speak in any way at all. In fact, its truly just begun. We're looking to travel next year, with our child, and we're still continuing to grow and dream together. So anyway, like I said, only you know what you need to do to be ready. ;-) good luck and congrats again!

Congradulations on the wedding. I would suggest talking to your soon to be husband since it is both yours and his decision and tell him how you feel about having a baby and way out the good vs the bad. Most people say to wait a few years after being married so that you have time to enjoy each other and get to know each other as husband and wife first. However, I just got married at the beginning of jan and I had the same feelings as you. I had to sit down with my husband and let him know and come to find out he wanted the same thing. So we have not reallly been trying but now I am 23 days late for my cycle and could be pG..

i agree with faiesh that you need to talk to your husband about it and see how he feels as just because you might be really wanting a baby at the moment he might be thinking its better to wait for a few years. i think you will instinctively know when it is the best time for you both to try for a baby, obviously you want to pursue your dreams but there is no saying that you cannot have a baby and pursue your dreams, it just means you have other commitments. i think there is a lot to be said for having children in your 20's as by the time they have grown up and become independant you are still 'with it' at the age of 45-50 i.e. it would then be your time to go travelling the world or just enjoying watching your children grow up. it depends also where your priorities lie. you get some very career minded women who focus 100% on their careers and then want children much later on in life, whereas you can get some women who are in their early 20's who want to have a hand in their career but put starting a family as their main priority. a friend i went to university with had a baby but the good thing was by the time he was at school age she would be working and getting experience whilst also having the joy of being a mum. it also largely depends on meeting the right partner of course as you obviously have. good lucky in whatever you choose. just remember the old saying 'do you live to work or work to live', your life won't 'end' if you decide to have a baby at a young age.

I agree with the others who suggested discussing it with your fiance to find out his thoughts. One thing to consider is that you have plenty of time to have children... if you are in a good place as far as starting your career (close to finishing grad school, and with an internship that could maybe lead to a good job?) you might want to wait a few years to get your career going so that you don't lose the momentum you have started. Also, I don't know if you have student loans to pay off, but that might come into your decision, especially if you plan to buy a house. My dh and I waited until our mid-late 30's to start a family... If I had to do it again, I might have started a few years earlier (maybe around age 30), but I'm glad that I had my 20's to spend with my husband and to learn about myself and what sort of work makes me happy. Now I have a part-time career that I love, and a family that I can focus most of my energy and time on. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding, and best of luck to you!