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Hitting doesn't do any good, and if you do it to your baby, she will think it's okay to do it to you. When my daughter does something wrong, I tell her no. If she doesn't stop what she's doing, I tell her no at the top of my lungs. If that doesn't work, I put her in a time out. That seems to be the best solution for me...it gives me time to calm down and realize that she's just a baby and doesn't understand what she's doing.

I agree with Jbear. Do not hit your little girl! Hitting doesn't teach anything. Remove her from the source if possible or remove the source. Buy those plastic coverings for the electrical plugs, do whatever but don't loose your temper! Again, Jbear is right: "she's just a baby and doesn't understand what she's doing" remember that.

Children of that age have poor impulse control. It is really simple. Hitting her will not stop her or make it so that she can anticipate your response and stop the behavior. The best thing you can do as a mother is to remove all things that are tempting to her, simply for her safety and your sanity. This is your job to do and it will be a while before she will be able to control these impulses. In the meantime, saying "no" and removing her from the situation while placing her in a new and safer situation is the only thing you can do. Good luck and please stop yelling and popping:)

When Angela (13 months) pinches or bites we do it back to her but lightly. She then crys like we tried to murder her but its just for show. We tell her to be nice and when her daddy says no he will say it louder until she stops if she continues to say grab for the telephone he will then lightly slap her hand. She will cry but in truth when we "slap" her its lighter then a regular touch, its the face and loudness of the words. Wr havent really done a time out except to put her in the play pen when she continues to be bad but now she trys to climb out of there.

I think the mere fact that hitting a todddler does not yeild the result you want, should be an indication that it is not the right form of discipline at that age. Skyfeather, experts agree that the best thing you can do is to divert her attention to something else, when she is misbehaving. There is simply no form of discipline that is appropriate for a 13 month old. None at all. Not even a time out.

Good LORD, this topic is very touchy. My baby is only 9 weeks so we dont have to deal with this yet, but I think that every mother knows what is best for their baby. Just because someone wants to discipline their child diferently than someone else doesnt mean its wrong. If it is the wrong thing to do then they will learn that it is not working. You sometimes have to use the trial and error thing in raising children. I am not saying that anyone is right or wrong, I am just saying that we are all learning here and there is no reason to tell people they are raising their children wrong.

Amaya's mommy..., nobody here said anyone was wrong. We are here to help each other, and to provide support. I was worried that my post would come across that way to someone. I truly did not intend to preach. I learned some things in child develpement cla__ses, and thought to pa__s them along to anyone that felt the info can be useful. The original post asked for our help, so we tried to do just that. If she felt she was doing everything correctly, she would not have come here for our help in the first place. There are developmental realities about babies and I see nothing wrong with pa__sing that info along to someone. I know that it is a mother's choice to use all information the way she chooses. Peace to mommies:)

E~ It wasnt necessarily you that I was talking to. It was mainly to the people that were not giving any other advice, except to STOP HITTING. I am pretty sure that this same person posted on another topic and everyone was doing the same thing. I do apologize if you thought I was talking to you, it just makes me so mad when people tell someone they arent helping their child by doing the only thing they know to do. I am trying to word this the correct way but it is probably coming out all wrong. Anyway, Here are my thoughts. I dont think it does any good to hit or pinch back or anything, but at 13 months, I also dont think it does good to yell and scream at them. I think at that time, just like you said there is really not any punishment you can give them. I know my nephew is 15 months old and he still doesnt understand that hitting is a bad thing. He isnt quite sure what no means. They tell him no when he hits, but they also tell him no when he tries to pick up Amaya (my baby) He sees everyone else picking her up but they tell him no. Anyway, I will stick to posts that I know something about. Sorry E for making you think it was you I was yelling at!

The pinshing back for our 13 month old does work. Maybe its because she is more advanced for her age. If she pinches you and you lightly pinch her back she does cry because she doesnt like it but then she wont do it back to you anymoer. One set of her grandparents she is left with all the time due to her mother not taking care of her but refusing us to have her. The grandmother has so many cases of child abuse against her and is very rough and mean to this baby, in return angela will be mean to older people specially "grandma" types because she makes the connection. BU when she is with my fiances mother she at first acts bad by pinchign and biting we tell her no and show her how it feels "sort of" then she is a good girl the rst of her stay with us. We would like to get her away from her mother and her mothers family but due to all the connections and money that family has the poor baby is stuck with a bad abusive family, even social services cant do anything because there is "strong evidence" but when a baby comes with brusies that are clearly from a hand and fingers thats eidence enough for me.

I meant No strong evidence

I see. I was initially insecure about my post b/c I didn't want anyone to think I was telling them how to raise their child.

Skyfeather - I am confused. Aren't you Angela's mother? And is Angela being left with someone who is abusive and has abused her?

Wow hard one!!!! My little one is biting!!! He loves to bit and go after toes...lol....I never hit him. It doesn't work. I hold his hands and say No. Then he started to say No to me with this sneaky grin. I just can't win......hheeeheee. I went through the same thing with my first born. He stopped. So will my youngest. Its all about patience. This is a phrase and it will pa__s. Hitting only teach Hitting!!! Yelling only may things worst. The calmer you are, the calmer your daughter will get. If you feel like you are getting mad, walk out of the room. Take a deep breathe and wait until your anger has pa__sed. Then tell your little girl no and explain why. Say SOFT TOUCH(my favorite) I learned this from Avery's(oldest) teachers and therapists when he was at birth to three. It works. Gently touch her hand and say "that hurts" No baby talk. Let her know you are serious. Less yelling and hitting, the less hitting and yelling your daughter will do.......Listen, I know its hard. It is very hard. Remember she is a baby. Babies don't know what is right or wrong. They want to explore and throw everything. Thats what being a baby is all about. Babies learn from mom and dad. So if she's hitting , she is learning it from you. Kids learn Behavior from their surroundings(parents) If the home life is bad, it shows in the child......Being a teen mom is hard enough. Being a teen mom of two kids is even harder. Maybe you should think about slowing down until you mature. Babies need mature parents. Good luck to you. Try to control your temper. Remember She is just a baby.

I would like to add that I think it is wonderful and responsible of you to recognize that you might need some help in this area. It is the brave who ask for help and admit that they may not be doing everything the best way possible. So many people are defensive about this subject and refuse to ask for help. I am sorry that you are so drained. I know this must be intensely difficult for you at times, as a teen mom. I am married, 32 years old, and feel overwhelmed often enough. I really admire those who manage to raise their children without a significant live-in partner. Blessings to you and always know that there are those of us who don't judge you and are simply available to help you in any way we know how. XOXO

I would agree with you E, but she wrote another post about popping her daughter over taking her pamper off. She needs to learn a new what of communicating with her daughter. The reason why her 15 month old is hitting, her mom is "popping" her when she do normal toddler behavior. I think she need a parenting cla__s to help her out. Hitting a baby is not right!!! I'm sorry, I can not agree with hitting. I am overwhelmed at times. I don't hit my kids. She need to get on her knees and crawl around like a baby to see what her child can get a hold of. Child proof your home!!! It make life easier.

to kEEKEE - I just saw that thread and responded to it 2 minutes ago. I did not see it b4. I am also against hitting and spanking as a form of discipline. I have never felt that instilling fear in your child is appropriate for a parent. I never want my child to be afraid of me. That is my way and I am not preaching that to anyone here so please, no screaming at me:)