Toddler Screaming Like He Is Getting Murderd NEED HELP ASAP

48 Replies
kristie h - July 4

Hi all, I have a 1.5 year old son and is is starting to scream as though he is getting murdered for no reason. I tell him to stop and he just gets louder so i smake is bum but that sumtimes either as he just gets louder. Is there anyone that has gone through this or is going through this? I need help asap as people will get the wrong idea or oneday he might be very hurt and i think its just him mucking around.

 

kristie h - July 4

Oh i was ment to say, when i smack his bum that sumtimes it dont work either as he jut gets louder. Thanks

 

Nerdy Girl - July 4

I am sure I am going to have someone tell me that this is child abuse, but my good friend friend with two boys recommended that I get a bar of soap for these situations. My daughter is much older than your son so this might not be the best technique for him since he is so young. For me this started when she turned 3. She would get p__sed off about something and just scream at the top of her lung for a long time. Like if she wanted candy or something and we said no, she would scream ear piercingly loud for like 10 minutes. Sometimes she would also throw and smash things. We would give her warnings to quiet down, give her time out in the "naughty chair," send her to her room, and then if that didn't work, we would threaten her with the soap. We have not had to actually use it often, but a little drag of Ivory bar soap on the bottom teeth will stop the yelling pretty quickly. As my daughter is getting closer to 4, now her anger-screaming is accompanied by talking back. Like if I tell her to stop some certain behavior or she'll be sent to her room, she'll get in my face and scream "No, YOU go to YOUR room!" Now I normally just have to ask her if I should get out the soap, and she stops. (Good Lord, what am I in for when she is a teenager??)

 

kristie h - July 4

Nerdy girl thanks. Instead of my son throwing things he bangs his head on the wall, door, floor what ever he can bang his head on he will. I dont think that is abuse about the soap i have heard ppl useing pepper, so no i my eyes there is nothing wrong with it. I will try the naughty corner thing and the cot thing. He is at the age where he mimics everything and i think he got the screaming idea off the cocatoo that lives at my mums neighbours house and now he uses it in tantrums or even whenh things are ok. I am not looking forward to the time he does it in the shopping mall though imagine what ppl will think .

 

bbm - July 4

It's funny, but I remember getting "the soap" and it worked for me...lol and that was 30 years ago! I think sometimes parents worry too much about types of discipline but frankly some kids need it.

 

SonyaM - July 4

My sister in law used tabasco sauce instead of soap and boy did that work. I don't have the heart to do it but I am sure it would work. My son (just turned four) has always done this. Sometimes it's worse than other but he has always been a "difficult" child. When he was about one he would sit down lean over and band his forhead on the tile. People would flip out but we never stopped him and soon he didn't get attention for it so he stopped. What we do with my son is calmly remind him to speak nicely and give him NO attention until he talks nicely and calmly. We also do time out if that does not work and if he screams in time out we add a minute. We have been working with a behavior thearpist and she has worked wonders with him. He even used to be so afraid of elevators we couldn't even go to the mall. Now he rides elevators like it's a game. But it took us going to the mall to ride elevators with the behavior therapist and working on it. Good luck..

 

HANNAHs Mom - July 4

I have a 4-year old who can be very challenging at times. Sometimes the time-outs and other techniques set her off more. What I have found to be the most helpful is to just stop and look at her and empathize....I'll say...you are upset aren't you etc etc etc. She knows I am listening to her feelings and we talk about how to solve the issue...this may be alittle advanced for a 1.5 year old?? although he may understand....Might be worth a try :) Good luck to you, I know how upsetting and frustrating it can be.

 

Nerdy Girl - July 4

Yes, I am doing things I SWORE that I would NEVER do. (wasn't there a thread specifically for this topic??) My dh and I also feel the same about spanking being a violent action, but I would be lying if I said that our crazy screaming tantrum-prone three year old has not pushed us to the point of spanking. Both dh and I have swatted her on the tush a couple of times, and then feel really bad about it. I don't really want to start physical punishment with her because once that stops working, then what do you do, beat the kid? I'm not serious with that comment, but do you see what I mean? I am too scared that the physical punishments can get out of hand in a moment of anger, which is why I swore that I would not do it. But my kid is really a handful. We too actually did some brief time with a behavior therapist, but did not have much success. I have found some of my daughter's issues have gotten better as she has gotten older though. Just curious, SonyaM- where are you located? Maybe you can recommend someone to use if you have had success.

 

luvmyboys - July 4

My SIL's kid used to scream ALL the time and she tried everything but he wouldn't quit. I think finally she started putting cayenne pepper on his tongue when he screamed and that cured him.

 

kristie h - July 4

Hi girls, tahnk you all for your help. I know alot of ppl disagree with smacking, i use the naughty corner apart from that he is too young for anything else so what ese am i ment to do. I know when i was a kid i did get smacked and as i got older i didnt get smacked as they grounded me made us do the dishes for a full two weeks ect ect. Yes there are ppl that go over board with spanking but other ppl will see that putting pepper on a childs tounge is torture. Do you know what i mean. Thanks all.

 

SonyaM - July 4

I am in San Antonio Texas. The therapist we used actually works for a school district here locally as an Autism Specialist and happens to be a friend of a friend. She just got her certifcation in behavior therapy for the district and is really awesome. She only charged us $25.00 a visit when she could have charged us $75.00 an hour. We were very grateful. She knows of other therapist but most likely only in Texas. Aren't you in Chicago?

 

Nerdy Girl - July 4

Yeah, I am in Chicago. We have the infamous "Tuesdays Child" here, but the program is about $1300. www.tuesdayschildchicago.org

 

hello - July 5

I cant believe some of this stuff i am reading here, soap ... pepper on the tongue, naughty corner,.... Firstly i cant imagine hitting a child especially a child so young... Why dont you try ignoring it... the behaviour keeps on going cause u acknowledge it big time and he is getting attention from it... negative attention but attention none the less...... just say when u are finished screaming i will listen or merely walk away...... you know yourself as an adult if you are not getting acknowledged u soon give up on whatever it is u are doing to try and get attention.... i will never raise a hand to my child, i certainly dont like someone hitting me so why would i hit her......she will be going without things when she is not being very nice or if she is having a tantrum its not going to get my attention i will ignore it and acknowledge her when she calms down.... Everyone has their own method but i think pepper on someones tongue or soap even is just cruel, there are other ways of handling things and i think a smack on the a__s is when u lose control of the situation and merely have no idea what the hell to do........

 

kristie h - July 5

Hello, i wish you would realy read my post 1st. Its like the boy who cried wolf. What if that happend, am i ment to ingnore him when i think he is ok cause he does it all the time but he is realy not. The whole point of this thread is that the girls can help me find other to teach my child right from wrong and they are tellin me the best way to go about it and what worked from them. I dont belive a child should scream continuaslly at the top of there lungs in the middle of the night when all he is doing is playing in his cot. What then i ment to take the cot away from him, i'm ment to ignore it when its dead silent. And no a tap on the arse is not lossing control of a situation its teaching them right from wrong when the kid wont listen any other way.

 

kristie h - July 5

By the way a 1.5 year old is not to young to teach right from wrong especially when you say no and naughty and all they do is stand there laughing at you and trying to see how far they can go to get away with things. My son is not stupid he understand pretty good for his age.

 

jas - July 5

No, Kristie - but what I think Hello is saying is basically, if the child is already screaming and you want him to stop screaming - smacking his b___t is only going to make him continue to scream so what's the point only to needlessly hurt your child? I am not a big advocate of spanking - but I have in certain situations without a second thought. Pepper I have never heard of - but I had the soap used on me when I was growing up - I will admit it was effective, but only because it was used to "clean the dirty words" coming out of my mouth. When my first son was about that age, we used the naughty corner and the loss of privledges. After a little while he was able to a__sociate his bad behavior with the loss of things and his good behavior with new things (not toys but things like going to the park, the petting zoo, etc...) Whatever method you choose, be consistant!!!!! At this age, they will test you to see what they can get away with. The more you wavier the more they will think they can get away with whatever they are doing.... Good luck

 

kristie h - July 5

Jas thank you, I do find when there is nothing to take off him ect then the smack does actually make him stop (he knows your serious). I guess im finding it hard cause he would just lay in his cot and scream and to tell you the truth it actally scared me last night when he did it at 1am. I went in to check on him and he was playing so i went back to bed, he started to do it again. I didnt know what to do, i knew he was ok but what if he realy wasnt and i just think well hes just playing. To make it a little clearer i dont mind the screaming as he is only a kid but i would never forgive myself if onday sumthing does happen and i ignore it.

 

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