April Mommies Rolling Over

94 Replies
runnershirl - January 6

Thx Krissy for the feedback--please, please don't think I'm being ungrateful because I'm not. The whole (or a little more of the) story is that the "help" being offered didn't stop with simply getting me a thing or two, but rather, it ended up where I was being told that they bought every signle last item every known to man that matched the theme of the baby room and sent it to me and it made me feel that I had to hang it all up, or else risk hurting someone's feelings. I told my MOL (and SOL) that "we'd see" to almost everything, or that "we hadn't decided yet" about many of these things...but they decided for me. I drew the line when they started telling me what picture frames and wall hangings they bought for that room(it's only 10x10) a__sured me on where exactly I could hang it. Not only did I feel that MY fun had been taken away, but that they weren't taking "NO" for an answer. They had it all planned out. MOL told me where my crib should go, where my futon, changing table, etc., should be, where the wallhangings should be, etc. I tried to slow her down so DH and I could do this together, and he even tried, but she didn't listen. Instead, she just kept shopping shopping shopping every day for 3 weeks and left all the remnants of her shopping in my dining room to overflow into my living room...I was busy at work and it stressed me out significantly--so much that my bp went up to 165 while she was here. While I completely utterly appreciate acts of kindness, she was no longer thinking about OUR needs. At every shower though, we will get things that we can't use or want, and we take it into stride as to that person's act of kindness, and I'll be okay with this...I think this situation was compiled by the fact that she was staying with me for 3 weeks, in my business, rushing me to decisions I wasn't prepared to make, telling me that she already bought the xmas 2010 baby dress, bought things I specifically said I WANTED TO BUY MY BABY and mostly thinking about her own needs before the needs of me, the baby or our health. I didn't want you or others to think I wasn't appreciative or an unkind person. By the way, when do we switch over officially to 3rd trimester group? How is everyone doing? I'm 25w4d weeks--check up yesterday said baby is fine and we did glucose test, which I haven't heard anything on. No news must be good news. Oh, and I did just get a charliehorse yesterday too! I think it's from dehydration isn't it?

 

Krissy25 - January 7

Runner, wow it sounds like your MIL has some real issues with boundries. I wish you luck in taking control of the situation b/c it will only get worse once the baby comes. I'm lucky my MIL can't drive b/c i think she would have come over everyday when my dd was born, she had to make due with the weekends when my FIL could drive her and even then they would either show up unannounced or call about 5 min. before they would arrive, giving me no time to clean up a little or make myself look a little better. Can you believe it we're almost in the 3rd tri. Where did the time go? I noticed July mommies are already starting to show up, yikes! When did we go from being the new kids on the block to the seniors of the 2nd tri board?

 

runnershirl - January 7

Krissy~ I know--I can't believe we're almost in 3rd tri--what's your due date? Mine is 4/14, but I've been looking farther along from day 1 if that accounts for anything. I personally think she's coming 4/4. Either way, we're almost there. wahooo... Yes, my MIL does have boundary issues. Fortunately (or unfortunately) her departure home (out of state thank god) left with a big fight between us--for the very reason you mentioned--i needed to get a handle of this NOW. She disrespected everything I told her and crossed ALL boundaries because of her own excitement--she forgot about me or mine (this is our first and likely only baby due to fertility issues and my age of 39). Since she's returned home, she's sent me no less than 4 emails to drudge this up again, despite my announcement that she can talk to her son about it because i need to keep bp down and need to finally enjoy this pregnancy. Did she listen, no? The thing I'm banking on is that she does live out of state and hopefully that will allow us more boundaries--ironically, in her 4 emails, she claims that she had no way of knowing what my boundaries are if I didn't tell her--are they common knowledge? (but, yes, we both did tell her). Thx for listening to me vent. But, I also think the "nesting" has kicked in for me--(anyone else?) and all I want to do is take control of my home and have everything ready. Which means, please don't buy the baby anything until the shower--by then we can get things in order and a place to put the stuff. Our baby shower is 2/21--how soon are the rest of you doing yours? Also, when is everyone transitioning to the other page for 3rd tri's? Happy New Year everyone!!!

 

lyleesmama - January 7

hi everyome! Well I'm starting to have problems trying to take care of a toddler and be pregnant at the same time. Lylee sure does keep me on my feet! Lol!! We are planning my shower march 6. My due date is april 3 but I'm having a csection march 27! Man I can't believe I start my last tri this saturday! It seems like just yestetday I was taking a pregnancy test! I'm gettin scared about taking care two babies at once. Lylee is so use to being an only child so I hope she can adjust well.

 

runnershirl - January 8

Hey gals--thought I'd start here before posting to another forum...Does anyone know about job protection available to us if we should lose our jobs while pregnant? When I have the baby, I would have been here 2 weeks shy of my one year mark, where FMLA would save the job while I'm on maternity leave...but, I found out today that the head of my dept is leaving and taking a good portion of the staff and a__sociates with him--which leaves the few of us newer ppl...if the firm keeps me, will they have enough work for me since the head is taking most of his work with him? He's only taking the more tenured folks with him, which excludes me... I know we have rights and as a paralegal, one would think I would have studied up on this, but I don't handle that type of law and am too busy with WORK--so I thought I'd pick your brains first. Any thoughts?

 

Krissy25 - January 10

Hello ladies, Runner my due date is 4/13 but my dd came 3 weeks early so i'm hopeful this little guy will do the same, with that said i'll probably go a week over. That's good that your MIL lives far away, she sounds like the kind of person who would be at your house everyday if she lived in the same town. Maybe with the baby coming you can get rid of the guest bed and just say "we need the space, you'll have to stay at a hotel when you visit" I'd bet she'd like that. I don't have any baby showers planned. I had 4 with my dd and i think that is enough. I really don't need much and i'm sure some people will end up getting the baby a gift anyway. A cousin of mine asked about one, i told her i wasn't going to plan one, she sounded like she might do like a lunch with the family so we'll see, nothing's official yet. I'm not sure about the FMLA thing. I work in a doctor's office and many of our patients need to take time off for surgery and use FMLA but with the economy being so bad some end up not having a job to go back to. Do you have a human resourses person? That would be the person to check with. Lyleesmama, wow you have a c-section date already? I guess i would too if that's what we were going to do but i'm going to try for a v-bac so it's all up in the air. I hear you on the 2 babies thing. Well my dd really isn't a baby anymore, she's 2 and a half now but she sure does keep my busy. I've kind of had to put myself in a "one day at a time mode" b/c if i think too much about how it will be trying to care for 2 i get overwhelmed. I will say that i'm doing as much as i can to prepair. We're moving our dd into her own room so the baby's room will be all set. I've bought diapers already (when i can find a good sale or use coupons) so that will be one less thing to worry about for a while. I'm getting clothes organized and i plan to have my hospital bag packed 4 weeks in advanced b/c i was caught off guard last time and my dh was yelling at me for not having it packed when my water broke, he he.. Oh well, just make sure you grab the camera the rest you can get later. So i guess i'm nesting a little. OK, it's late i need to go to bed. Hope the rest of the weekend goes well for you ladies.

 

vsetter - January 10

AHHHHH --- I gained 3 pounds this past week!!!! What is this????

 

lyleesmama - January 10

vsetter~ wow that does seem to be alot but we are in our last tri now so the baby gains alot of weight right now. I've got my dr app tomorrow so I'm gonna find out how much weight I've gained...I bet it's alot though. We will see. I started my 7th month yesterday! Wow I can't believe it! It just trips me out that this will be my last time being pregnant! It kinda makes me sad. But I kno being pregnant is too hard on me to fo again.

 

vsetter - January 10

Yep --- I have to admit that it has me a bit nervous. Especially because I think that I gained 2 or 3 pounds last week too. But, I don't have any swelling and don't feel like I have gained excessive weight (I'm up to 20 pounds now). But, the ultrasound doctor said she had a big belly. I went for my gestational diabetes test on Thursday and go to my regular OB tomorrow. Hopefully, I can get some info tomorrow!

 

lyleesmama - January 10

vsetter when I did my us my dr didn't tell me anything about it. I had ro ask if everything looked normalit was kinda frustrating. But I guess they see so many women in a day it's normal to them huh?

 

runnershirl - January 10

Vsetter, lylee~ I think you girls are a couple weeks ahead of me, right? I'm due 4/14--and I've gained 25 lbs last week (i'm 26w today)...Strangely the dr. didn't say anything about my weight last week. Do you think that's odd? Krissy~ Good idea on stocking up on diapers and such already--and packing bag early. I'm a new mommy-to-be, so please feel free to share ideas. Also, do you think there's any genetic link to premature babies...both me and my dh were born 2 mos premature, so I'm starting to feel anxious to get everything done. Cleaned out some cabinets and starting to get some things done around here--nesting is definately kickign in--when I'm not feeling lazy. On my work thing, I am a paralegal and will research more about my rights, and an atty said he'd rep me if I lost my job--I was caught up in the moment on Fri and thx for listening...my dh has been out of work due to back surgery and that puts the burden on me some, so my emotions took over when I posted. So far, I hear they value my work and htat I have nothing to worry about, but you all know attys--sometimes they don't really think about what's "right"... Hope you all have a wonderful evening and welcome to those who are in 3rd tri already! Wahoo! I'm right behind ya!

 

Krissy25 - January 10

Well ladies, i think i've gained a few lbs this week too, i've gone over the 140 mark so that's a little depressing, so i guess total it's almost 20 lbs, i'd like to keep it at 30 lbs or under but that probably won't happen. Runner, I don't think it's too odd that the doctor didn't say anything especially if everything else looks good. I'm sure they understand it can be a really touchy issue for some women. I'm not sure about the whole premature thing, I guess it depends on what the circ_mstances were that led to the both of you being premature. I would make sure you let your doctor know so he/she will be aware. Lyleesmama I know how you feel about the u/s tech not saying anything. I think they figure the doctor will go over the results with the pt as they have the final say on whether something is normal or not. Some may be under instructions not to say anything. Vsetter, how did your GD test go? I guess you will probably find out the results tomorrow. I have mine on Friday along with my u/s to follow up on the kidney issue. Hopefully it's either resolved itself or it's getting better. On top of that i'm pretty sure i can feel the baby's head up high and the kicks down low. I know it's too early to really be worried about him being breech as there is still plenty of time to turn but my dd was breech so we'll see. Well i hope everyone has a good week this week. I work for a doctor and we have 50 patients on the schedule for tomorrow so that's a little scarry, hoping for some no-shows.

 

vsetter - January 11

Hi everyone! So I just got back from the doctors and everything is okay. My gestational diabetes test came back normal, bp is good, and my belly size (although on the smaller size) is also normal. Doc is also not concerned about the weight gain as long as it doesn't continue at this week's rate. According to her scale (which, of course, is greater than my scale), I have gained 24 pounds...which to her is still normal. Let me mention -- I am 27 weeks, due April 10. Regarding the baby's big belly -- doc said that she is only slightly larger than she should be. Nothing to worry about. But, she does want me to decrease my intake of simple sugars, and eliminate any fruit juices (which are very high in simple sugars, she said). She said this modification should keep the baby at the right size and keep me from gaining too much weight total. BUT -- I have an ultrasound scheduled for mid-February to follow-up. Krissy -- we've still got lots of time for the baby to move. I wouldn't worry about breech yet. Mine is sitting sideways if that is any consolation! Wow -- that would hurt :) Good luck on Friday!

 

lyleesmama - January 11

hi everyone! My appt also went great. I only gained 2 lbs though. I'm boarderline gestional diabetic though. He's not changing my due date. I was hoping he would but oh well. hey when should we roll over to third tri thread? I'm ready when ever just don't forget me over here...lol

 

Krissy25 - January 11

I just had the worst experience trying to return a movie at redbox, it took 2 days, 3 diff locations ( 2 of which i went to twice) and about an hour and a half a my time trying to do it. I won't get into why it was such a problem but needless to say i'll probably won't be renting from them any time soon. Ok deep breath, ahh that's better. Vsetter, glad to hear the GD test came back normal and everything looks ok. I'm not too worried about the baby being breech, i guess i just feel like since it happened once it will happen again. But i really have no reason to think that. Lyleesmama, do they plan to do the 3 hr test to confirm the diabeties? With my dd i didn't pa__s by a few points so i did the 3 hr and i pa__sed that one. Maybe we should move to the 3rd tri. next week, i think everyone who is still active in this thread hits the 3rd tri by the begining of next week. Does anyone else feel like their babies are having periodic parties in their bellies throughout the day? I swear this kid is dancing up a storm at least 3 times a day. I must admit i do enjoy the kicks, it does make me sad that this pregnancy will most likely be the last time i get to feel them.

 

sarahsteele - January 11

hi ladies!! i have a very sensitive computer that only like to work a couple of times a month haha! would get a new one if i didnt have so much baby stuff to buy hehe! Cant beleieve we are entering the 3rd trimester already!! ive only gained 15 pounds!! and also due april 10 but delivering at either 38/39 weeks.. I didnt gain much last pregnancy either but had 9 pound baby! Had my gestational diabetes test last friday too, getting results tomorrow, a little nervous about that because im sure i developed that last time but never got tested.

 

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