18 And Possibly Pregnant. Help Me.
5 Replies
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I had an abortion about 4 months ago, and it tore me apart. After graduating high school I've been depressed and constantly looking for something to fill the void. I shared my pain with my boyfriend, 19, and he decided that he was ready to be a father. We've been together for 2 years and we are having unprotected sex with the intention of getting me pregnant, but now I'm scared. We're living in his parent's old house because they moved a couple of hours away, he is looking for work with no luck yet, and I'm feeling foolish for being so impulsive. I just feel overwhelmed by loss and I want a baby more than I want to breathe. He has promised to stand by me no matter what trials we face. I just want someone with more experience as a person or mother to help me through these feelings. We've recently decided that is our current efforts have not gotten me pregnant, then we'll stop trying and wait for a better time, but it is possibly too late. Someone, please give me something. I'm desperate for help.
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M, sorry you had an unplanned pregnancy and an abortion that upset you so much. Now I fear that you are about to compound your problems with a planned pregnancy and birth with no visible means of support. Will you not feel even more depressed when you are unable to give your baby what it needs? Please step back and think about what you are doing. Get some decent birth control and wait to have a baby when you are better able to provide for it.
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But what if I am already pregnant?
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M, you've been through the decision process once already. If it's too traumatic to repeat, the unconventional alternative is adoption or even open adoption. There's a nice article on that in Vogue this month. Run a home pregnancy test on first morning pee if you are late already.
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Im so sorry you are going through all of this. I just want to tell you (from experiance) having a baby does not fix your problems or your relashonship. It makes it harder. A baby is a wonderful gift and it does change you and mature you, but its the hardest thing you will ever do. Please consider adoption if you dont feel you are capible right now to raise a child. Please keep us posted.
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Hi, Im so sorry for what you going thourgh If you are looking to adoption my husband and me are trying to adopt and would love to give you the adoption agancies name that we are using. Make sure to use an agancy to make sure your needs are covered properly.
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