20 With A Baby

25 Replies
Ashley Tulk - November 2

I got pregnant at 19, it wasn't planned, I'm 20 years old now, living with my fiancee and we have an almost 4 month old little boy, if I had to change anything about my life... I wouldn't! some people say 19 is too young for a baby, I'm happy and my son has everything he needs! it doesn't matter what age you are as long as you love your child more then anything else!

 

sab - November 2

I’m the same I have just turn 20, me and my Fiancé are thinking about a baby. I total agree with you it does not matter if your 20 or 30, you still have the same love for your child, you will protect your baby and care the same as any mother would. I wish you all the best in your life, may your little boy fill you with so much love.

 

jorden - November 3

i was 19 when i got pregnant. I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years. My little boy just turned 4 months and i think its a great idea! I love being a young mother. I dont want to be 50 when my kid is 10...ya know? I love kids...especially babies!!!!!!! i want lots!

 

sarah - November 4

I have just joined this link,and am afraid I have to disagree.It is the most natural thing in the world to love a child,as you would a wanted puppy,in both cases you would feel you have made the rigt decision,and cannot get over the love you have at this dependent.However,why I disagree is because it makes a hell of a difference at what age you are,like these kids having children when they themselves are children.When you have a child you want to protect them,do the best you can for them etc etc.A person,younger than you,what most of these debates are aimed at even if they are married,at no way is a girl of 16 or 17 ready for a baby to care for.So yes,there has to be an element drawn on age.

 

Ashley - November 4

I have to disagree with you there, my friend is 24 with 4 kids, she had her first when she was 15 and she loved her then just as she loves her and her other children now! age doesnt change how much someone loves there children, who that person is matters! I'm not saying that people who are young are ready to have a baby, I'm just saying they will love them very much when they have it! its very hard not to love a child no matter what age you are!

 

Elizabeth - November 4

Ashley,I have to disagree,I had a baby 14yrs ago.The conception was a mistake,I had the baby,would have had a abortion,but a long story,did not find out until a while later.Anyway.I had the baby,but had him adopted.Yes,I was drawn as a mother would,but it was the wrong time,I was young and wanted to enjoy my life.My child is with his "parents"the father is dead,their family do not want anything to do with him.I thought when my ex partner died in a car crash they would,but no,neither his sister.I still keep in touch with the parents via letter,they send photo's etc.I will always be there if he wants to contact,and am always writing to the parents.I think that yes,age can change how you feel.I now have another child,and am on this list because I am pregnant again.The 1st I was very young,and could not keep him,but years later I fell in love,and did all the things other ladies are saying.I love my first born child,that is natural,but to be honest,yes,I was far to young to have him,the love was different because it was not a deep love with a man like I have with my husband.I do not regret giving him up for adoption.I love him,but it should not have happened.

 

To ashley - November 6

Hey sweetie.. Well I dont know you or anyone else on here personally but. I will voice my views on this. and will not judge anyone cause that is in gods hands only in my eyes. but for you to say you would never give up your child via abortion or adoption and say that's the coward way out. that does not seem right. you may never do it but because someone else has made that desision in there life does not make them a coward. woman go through alot of different things and have there own reason for what they do or do not do. So until you have an abortion or you give a child up for adoption and see how it feels I feel its not right for you to speak on it. Im sure if you had to do either one of those choices for a reason you would not want to be called names especially a coward. cause you would have done it for your own reason. God bless and everyone take care.

 

To elizabeth - November 6

God bless you, and your 1st born. you gave him a chance for a life you thought you could not give..Him..once again im going to voice my view on what you said not speaking down on you or anyone else. but i think god gave you your 1st born for a reason so when you said it never should have happen well it kinda makes me sad. god may have let you have that baby for you to give him up for adoption and to let another family have him that may have been his plan all along..all things happen for a reason and that reason is because that is gods plan. so yes your first born should have happened..im happy for you and your husband your 2nd child..and your 1st child and his family.. god bless

 

a - November 6

you right babies are a gift from god

 

Ashley - November 6

me and my fiancee are raising my son on social a__sistance, and although it is hard that boy has everything he needs including a gfamily who loves him, no matter what age I was i would never give my child up for adoption because it is a sin! imagine, you had this child inside of you for 9 months! you done all the rite things to make sure he/she stays healthy but while doing all of this your saying to yourself you dont want this child, someone else raise my own flesh and blood! no sorry I don't agree with that at all, I know someone who is now 16 with a 2 year old, she was raped and ended up getting pregnant, she said even though the circ_mstances were bad her child is the only thing in the world that matters! think about it! how many of you are adopted and how many of you wish you know who your real parent are!! imagine how your child will feel when he/she gets older and they find out they are adopted! its heartbreaking

 

sue - November 21

hey, I also got pregnant with my son at 19 years old and gave birth when i turned 20. The pregnancy was very difficult for me, my boyfriend and I had decided to go our seperat way a few weeks prior to finding out, and this hade put every thing on hold for my future such as bakpacking threw the world going and finishing university and having a normal late teens early 20s life. I belive that it does matter what age you r whene you have children it coastes money and to have deasent wages you need good emplyment and with out a proper education past high school that could turn out to be very difficult. I am in school now finishing my degree, all day I am in school whil my children are at day care, i pick them up then its off home to make supper feed the children clean them up make super read them a story put them to bed by the time every thing is said and done it is now 8:20 and time for home work. I hardley gwet to see them . And when I'm not bussy doing those things I work two part time jobs ,groceries and arons cleaning the house diches and every and eny thing else that would acc_milate during the cors of a day. All this to say that if you are older and more well established you could not only give more materialisticly but also emotionaly spiritualy, and phisicly to a child because loving a child is more then emotions.

 

to ashley - November 21

is your friend married by any chance? I saw an unsettling court case on Judge Joe Brown that showed 3 21 year old girls that already had 4 kids each without being married

 

mandaleeanne - March 16

Age does matter in some circ_mstances. But I am so sick of reading posts and arguements starting b/c of these older "mature" women start arguing about these young mommies not being a good parent b/c they didn't experince all of life's experiences and they are so young. To me age does matter IF you are still in high school, b/c you are living at home and you have not completed your needed education and if you had a baby, your parents would be paying for most of your responsability. But who are these "older mature women" to come on these threads and be-little 18, 19 and 20 year olds who are mothers or who are becoming mothers?! Grow up and stop being so unhappy with your own life that you take it out on these young women!

 

natalie09 - March 16

I'm sorry but I really have to disagree with people that are saying 18, 19, 20 is too young to have a child. A friend of my family had a child when she was 15 years old (yes I believe that is too young) however she made it work and is now 43 years old and still with the man she had that child with. I think everyone has the right to make their own decisions in life and not get critisised. People have to learn from their own mistakes.

 

Victoria_1985 - April 27

Hey ladies! I am 20 yrs old and am 29 weeks along with our first child. Some people disagreed with the choice my fiance and I made to keep our baby but really to us it wasn't a choice at all. We created our child out of love for one another and thats what this baby is to us, pure love. I have to disagree with the ladies that say adoption is the cowards way out, adoption is one of the most loving acts a person can do, especially if they know they wont be able to give the baby everything it needs and deserves. It takes a strong women to be able to do something like give up part of herself. I CAN'T wait to see our little baby...July 15th can't get here soon enough!!! Check out my pizco site to see some 3d images....www.toria1985.piczo.com

 

Ddvinson3 - May 15

To Ashley Congrats on your new life I know this is an old post but it really irritates me that some people come in here and have to ruin it for others. It's fine to have an opinion but you don't have to be rude about it. I am 20 years old and 21 weeks pregnant. I was 19 when I got pregnant. I am married and also have a wonderful job and we have a house that we bought a couple months after we got married. So I don't consider myself to young to have a baby. I'm very mature and I will have unconditional love for my baby and that is all that matters. And I am also very financially stable to support a child. I do think if you are in high school and thinking of having a child I think it's a little to early. At least graduate first. But everyone has their own opinion and some people obviously don't know how to voice them in the appropriate manner....Sarah

 

Chris23 - May 17

Age is not the issue. The issue is whether or not a person is emotionally and financially ready for a baby. If you are, it really doesn't matter if you're 19 or 30.

 

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