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Lisa, sounds like you are doing great (knock on wood) and the more independent you are the better equipped you'll be to make a decision on your future, keep up the positive att_tude :) Regarding colics, these are a few things I've learnt, be careful what you eat and find out what gives your baby gas (other than the obvious like broccoli, cauliflower etc...there's caffeine and chocolate), make sure you burp Jaz regularly to eliminate air bubbles in her system, don't feed her just to calm her down if it's not time for a feed it only makes her digestion worse, and get some Gripe Water (I give her 1/2 tsp after every meal) and if the colics are bad I give her simethicone(enfacol is sold at Mothercare)...other than that you have to learn certain holding techniques that will soother her and apply some pressure on her tummy. Zein likes being across my lap because my knee presses against her belly. Lesley, are you doing ok? Is your dh gone? I too read your post regarding Ben's hearing, I hope he's alright but I've noticed that Zein doesn't respond to all noises equally, have you tried crumpling a plastic grocery bag? Good luck and keep us posted! Mary, sounds like you have things under control that's great! Pendant sounds very nice :) I haven't had time to reflect on PPD, I think I've got the blues, usually a depression for me means panic attacks and not being able to get out of bed, so thankfully I haven't reached that stage! I too am prone to depression :s I have one nipple that is constantly hurting me, I wish b___stfeeding were easier :(

thanks for your words of encouragement ranya, have you thought of only b___stfeeding one side? Jasmin preferes my right and so do i, its also more full, left side feels alkward and hurts, Lesley whats going on with the hearing test, your also in uk, Jaz is 3 weeks and just had hers, I think you should go to your doc and demand one, they told me the sooner the better so it doesnt effect their development if they do have a problem as you can start addressing it, say that to them? im sure hes fine. Ranya you say only feed when hungry, but how do you do that? if i take her out she only needs fed every 3-4 hours but ifi stay at home shes either asleap or feeding, she goes for hours feeding at home, and screams if i stop her, i resort to taking her out for hours to get a break, but its winter and sometimes i want to stay in

Lisa, at first I was feeding on demand for hours which was very frustrating and time-consuming. I would wait until she fell asleep at my b___st, which could take anywhere between 45 minutes to 1hr and a half. I would interpret every cry as being a sign of hunger until I started hating b___stfeeding and my nipples were getting blistered. I talked to her doctor and he said to me what I was doing was completely wrong. She should not be left at the b___st for more than 20 minutes (so feeds would be 40 minutes only) because apparently anything more than that is ineffective suckling where she's not getting milk anyway and is just satisfying her need to do the sucking motion. Also feeding her too frequently doesn't give her digestive system a chance to rest and causes more colics and gas. He said to wait for at least 2 hours between feeds. Newborns don't know anything but to cry so they do that when they are bored, hungry, colicky etc...so it's up to us to realize what they are feeling. When she's colicky she gets frantic and starts kicking her legs and crying inconsolably, she screams at the top of her lungs. I also realized she strains really hard as if she's constipated. When I used to feed her through these episodes, she'd pull at my nipple and suck really hard in frustration, but would quiet down (which was my goal at the time). Now I don't feed her if 2 hours haven't pa__sed. She still has colics (they are inevitable) but they are much more manageable. I give her a pacifier (dipped in Gripe Water so she'll take it) and I ma__sage her tummy or put her flat across my knees and push down a bit on her back where the other side her belly is against my leg. I give her simethicon when the colics get really bad and sure enough, shortly after she pa__ses gas and feels more relieved. Does any of this make sense to you? Hope it helps, colics suck and they make you feel so helpless to their pain :(

Lisa, there is a waiting list for hearing tests. I have no idea how ong it is, but i know I have to wait at least 6 weeks. They don't give babies hearing tests round here untill they are about 8 month old. I went mad when I found that out. When I had my other 2 kids I didn't really know much but since reading all the benefits of having a hearing test in the first couple of weeks I think he should have one ASAP. I refuse to wait about for months. When Adam was waiting for him (to see if he had glue ear) it was just under 6 month we waited for his appointment to coe through. I've been phoning round privte hospitals and I think I'm taking him to a one in Newcastle, only thing is I need a refferal letter from Ben's doctor. I'm going down first thing in the morning to see if I can get one. I am annoyed that they give hearing tests to babies when they are first born almost everywhere in the UK, but not here. --- I did throw John out on Friday morning. He just took his stuff and went. I had a feeling he would come back when he knew I would be on my own and the kids would be awake. I don't argue infront of the kids you see, so I wouldn't tell him where to go. When he did come in I sent Adam upstairs to play in his bedrom with Leigh, and put Ben down for a nap. We sat and argued for ages. All I ask of him is a bit help and a bit of respect. I am the one who is raising his kids almost single handedly. Anyways he is still here but I refuse to sleep in the same bed as him. I asked him to sleep in the bottom bunk of Adam's beb, but when I woke up to feed Ben he was in my bed. So I took the quilt and slept on the sofa, and I've slept there since. John just won't go, no matter how many times I tell him I don't want him to be here. I wish I had somewhere to go so I cold just get out of here. It's 10:24 and he is still in bed...again. When he came bck on Friday he said he will start going to bed and get up early. He did get up when I shouted of him yesterday, at 2pm. So much for early eh! I can't even put my name down for another house. This is in my name and I can't just leave it. I think I am going to grin and bear it untill after christmas. I don't want to spoil the kids' christmas by throwing their dad out. It's Adams birthday on Thursday too. 5 already! I can't believe how fast it has went :-(

Ranya, yes your message helps me understand, I guess its just easy, i try to do other stuff to stop Jasmin crying but if it doesnt work i just feed her, i guess it stops me feeling like a`failure, Lesley, men hey! seem to have us where they want us, i think im mad sometimes letting dh come back after he left us both for a month when Jasmin was 19 days old, with no money to pay bills or buy nappies, while hes home chilling out, drinking probably and getting stoned, while my parents pay my bills because i cant...aghhhh, you need to set your dh straight, its not your sole job to bring up the kids esspecially with him being in bed so much, guess its easier for you to breeze throough till xmas though

hi ladies! how's everyone doing today? i'm doing sooo much better now that i'm home again. after going to my grandmas for thanksgiving we drove to my brother-in-laws in Indiana. this trip turned out less than fun for my dh, who wanted to show off our baby to his brother and his brothers in-laws, because she was cranky a large part of the time. people kept suggesting that maybe she was colicky or had a belly ache but i KNEW it was because she wasn't napping very well. the whole trip she napped very lightly and only for an hour at a time at the very most, but most of the time less. her nap schedule was all thrown out of wack. my dh started to get p__sed off at people who try to tell us what to do with our baby, and i'm starting to agree at times. i'm so annoying to have complete strangers inserting their opinions when we're out and about. oh! and my dh and i had s_x for the first time since isabelle was born (almost 5 weeks ago). it was a bit uncomfortable but i think it was because the last bit of my st_tches fell out. i think it'll be more fun the second time around. oh, and we forgot to use a condom, i'm crossing my fingers that it's not a problem yet cuz i'm b___stfeeding and a tiny bit of discharge is still coming out every once in a while. anywho, hope you all are doing well today :-)

Shannon, I used nothing the whole time I was b___stfeeding my daughter. As soon as I stopped b___stfeeding I fell pregnant. I had s_x 11 days after Ben was born. It wasn't painfull or uncomfortable, but I haven't had it since. I just can't get h__y lol. Far too tired!

OMG you two are mad :-) my midwife warned me she discharged a mother and baby after 12 days after birth, she was b___stfeeding and not using contraception, the same midwife saw her back at the unit several weeks later pregnant for her booking in appointment!!!! apparently it only works if you feed every 3 hours and dont miss a feed. dont get me wrong having Jasmin is the best but another in 9 months!!! wow

I am using condoms now untill I get the coil fitted at 6 weeks. I suppose I was lucky last time :-)

I'm off to docs in about 10 mins. See what he says.

morning girls, im sat here on a feeding fest!!! Jasmins hungry! Its sunny outside today, although freezing. Dh sent me an email yesterday, a really nice one saying he is missing us both, mabie this time away will be good for him. . Lesley hows things with dh? and docs?

The doctor has said she will send the referral letter for me :-D It should take 2 weeks at the most for a consultant appointment. Then a hearing test not long after. I have no idea how I am going to pay for this but I will worry about that when the time comes. I need him to get a test and I refuse to wait about for 13 weeks. John has started helping out more in the house. We still sleep seperate. I can't bare for him to touch me. It's my oldest sons birthday on Thursday. He has been inviting his friends to his party, but I can't afford to have one for him. I feel so guilty. So I'm buying a cake, some candles and party bags and taking hem up the school on Thursday. He can b__w the candles out while his friends sing happy birthday then they all get some cake. That way he doesn't have a party but he still shares his birthday with his friends. I;m having a tea party for him in the house, with my mum here. Noone else. Every year I have had parties everything has gone to waste and I'm fed up with it. Next year I will have one for him. I will be more organised by then. I'll be able to book a room, and maybe a magician or a bouncey castle.

hi girls. my baby girl is officially 5 weeks today! :-) i need to start thinking about going back to work, go talk to people about starting up again, which i really don't want to. but i have student loans to pay. *sigh* i'm supposed to go out with a few friends to some bars tonight. i probably won't be out too long, cuz i'll worry about the baby, and i probably won't have more than a couple drinks cuz i don't think i have the tolerance, but i still worry if i'm pumping enough milk. if b___stmilk wasn't so good for the baby and so convenient at night i'd seriously think about switching to the bottle.

I just read your post about colic and the symptoms, Ranya. Jaime has many of the same symptoms, however he does not cry inconsolably, we can calm him down throw rocking him and walking around. However, he strains a lot and pa__ses gas a lot. I believe my in-law is to blame for a much of it as she is overfeeding him. Whenever he cries she stuffs him with 2 oz of formula. It is nuts to think that the solution to a baby crying is to give him food. Anyway, they are living tomorrow after being here for 2 weeks. I am still struggling at b___stfeeding. The pain is at times not bereable, most of the time it is almost not bereable, but I am still doing it, not sure why. DH started his new job this week, so he is gone during the day, which means less chances of a confrontation or fight. He came home yesterday missing us, and that was so sweet and made my heart skip a beat. I am getting about 3 to 5 hours of sleep per night in chunks of 1 to 2 and 1/2 hours in between feeding times. What about you? how much do you sleep at night? I cannot yet sleep during the day as inlaw is very noizy around the house.

mary what are you inlaws doing feeding your baby formula when your b___stfeeding, bet you cant wait till they are gone. Ive decided to chuck the books advice and going with the thoery of keeping Jasmin secure and safe and happy, i hold and cuddle and chat to her lots, i figre id rather have a happy secure baby than one that does cry itself to sleep and manage on its own but isnt happy, even if it means she is a bit spoilt, good your getting the test lesley, although i think its c___p you have to pay, I know what you mean that you cant bear dh to touch you, its trust for me, i dont want him to hurt me (emotionaly) so cant get close to me physically, even though i think hes fit, i just cant be intimate with him, ive put up so many barriers it would be like giving in to him. Im going to have to get over this though

Hi everyone sorry i haven't been around, i've been really busy with a colicy baby! Kai's 6 weeks on thurs and is doing really well. His colic has settled down considerably which is a relief as he is a much happier baby! His father still doesn't want anything to do with him, a friend sent a text and a picture to him. When i look at my son i think how beautiful he is and how much i love him, it make's me feel sick that andrew doesn't want to see him. Oh well it's his loss he's missing out on something truly special and from now on whenever he has his next child he'll always know that it isn't his first and one day it will bite him back, what goes around comes around. Anyway i'm very happy and doing very well myself c",) Hi lesley glad you've been sorting your appt! You'll find a way to pay for it and it will be worth it! Luckily health insurance is free here and all babies are ent_tled to a hearing test so mine is tomorrow. I'm not as nervous he's been reacting to a few more sounds and as i said the majority of my family are partially deaf so it wouldn't bother me if he had a hearing problem. I just hope it's not very severe and if he has got something wrong I'm glad we can start doing something about it now.