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Thaks Teresa - I appreciate the info. Lesley - are you going to talk to you dr today?? I am going to call and push the u/s up to this week - or at least try like hell too. If not I am going to try what Becky had suggested - lie and say something is going on to get in. I hate to do that but you gotta do what you gotta do! Lesley - I live in Connecticut so I am suffering through the same heat wave as you - isnt it disgusting!!!!! It is going to break on Wed! I am going to try the yahoo group again - I hope no one minds me joining right now! You guys are the only ones who have gone through what I am going through so your all I have for a real support! Plus I want to stay in touch with everyone to see how everyone makes out. We have all shared each other's sorrow and it would be great to be there when all the good news comes rolling in too! Rain - how are you doing?? Just a quick question to anyone who might be able to help me with this - I know when alot of you went for your u/s there was no heartbeat. If that happens will I somehow know? I still feel pregnant - would I continue to if the baby's heart stopped? I just dont want to be more of a nervous wreck at the u/s than I all ready am. Take care everyone!!

Hi all Well I finally got a hold of my dr. this morning. she said that the baby's heartrate was now 82, and there had been no growth in the past week. she said I should go back for one more u/s on weds (to confirm that there's no hb left) - she is pretty sure it won't last much longer. and then she'll schedule me for a d&c on friday. she agrees with my need to get it over with and move on. the funny thing is, i was keeping it together when she was talking to me, until she started describing the d&c plans and she said "Grace would do it". Grace is the ob/gyn who did my c-section last year with dd, and that just made me start to bawl. For some reason it makes it extra hard, thinking that the last time I saw her she was giving me a baby, and this time, well...it's kind of the opposite. Anyhow...no time for tears...going to take my ds swimming this morning. Life goes on. what doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right? Big hugs to all.....

Oh Leslie---I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry. I'm also sorry if I've been naively cheering you on. . I REALLY thought all was going to be ok. I guess, when it comes down to it, our docs do know---and if there was hope they would show it. I'm glad you'll go back in this week for confirmation--and then be able to get through this whole process relatively quickly so you can move on. Again. . . I'm so sorry. Becky

ELAINE-- Keep us posted on what you talk your doc into. They've GOT to be reasonable. . .!! Regarding your question on future health of baby after an early slow HR. . . My doc said the same as the previous poster. . . these things generally take care of themselves--if the embryo is really "wrong" the HB will not right itself. If it does, it means everything is ok. She told me that if things looked good at my second u/s that I needn't worry--there were no implications for the rest of the pregnancy or the child. HTH!--and regarding if you know if the HB stops. . . well---I guess I could tell. I never felt super pregnant to begin with (didn't with dd#1 either). I felt the same--and still pregnant--after the first icky u/s--but after the second (no growth and even slower HB) I started to feel less pregnant. . . no more need to eat regularly, no tender full b___bs, etc. Now (2 days away from my D&C) I don't feel pregnant at all--and hopefully that will be a good thing in this process. . . i.e. that I don't have feelings that will be "lost" when this is all over. I don't know if that helps. . . Good luck!! And keep us posted!! Becky

ELAINE---where are you girl??? Please tell me you are out celebrating. . .???? ((((Hugs)))))) no matter what!! Becky

Lesley...sweetie I am so sorry for your loss. I know that it is tremendous... ~**~*~* LOVE & a HUGE Hug to you and your family...

Katie & Teresa - get your b___ts over to the Yahoo site so we can all be together in one spot! We miss you there.

FOR THOSE LADIES THAT HAVE EXPERIENCED A LOSS: ~*~*~*~*I have been mystified about some of my intense feelings and lack of emotions during the last days of my pregnancy. Then I found a quote in a movie that really describes my experience. It may also help (I hope) give you a sense of "YES...I felt that too!!!!!! ~*~*~*~*There is a painful difference between the "expectation" of an unpleasant event and its final certainty~*~*~*~*For me this helped. I felt sane. It explained why I didn't cry when the doctor said there may not be a heartbeat when you return on Tues. and why I lost it/cried during my final U/S when I knew it was about to become a certainty. I hope you guys don't mind me talking about my sad feelings. They seem to be a part of me just like the ones of happy expectation of a new healthy pregnancy~*~*~*~*~*Can anyone relate or is this too sad to talk about?

Lesley: Just got my ID and pa__sword. Now lets hope I can find the group (smile).

I'm having a bit of trouble finding you all at Yahoo. Should I do a search for the group then apply to join? So far no Fasrfriends2005 (I did copy the complete health grooup address and removed the dashes).

Hi Katie--glad you're going to join us!! I'm afraid I'm not much help. . . since I set up the group, everything comes up automatically so I can't tell where you're having the problem. Elaine posted above about how to delete the superfluous dashes and spaces. . . please keep trying!!----TERESA---are you still around? Want to stick around with us on yahoo for a while? How are you doing? Becky

Katie---I really like that quote!! And I think a lot of folks will really relate. Oddly. . . I agree with the quote. . . but read it opposite than most people might. . For me, the expectation of the "unpleasant" event was more painful than its final certainty. . . how's that for crazy?? I cried more during that first week of waiting and uncertainty. Some tears last week with the final news. Now. . . I bet I'll be totally fine at my D&C on Wednesday. (don't quote me! :) Get over to Yahoo lady!--Becky

Katie - thank you for the quote. Funny enough, i am like Becky - I was WAY more emotional before I found out that there was no hope. I was struggling terribly with teh rollercoaster ride. but once it was over (it's 99% certain for me now) I felt more sadness, but more calm. Going to check Yahoo now...hope to see you there, girlfriend xo

Katie - I can't figure out why the address doesn't work for you?!? Did you remove all three dashes and the slash at the end?

Katie (and Teresa)--I still don't know what the problem is with Yahoo, but I think I can "invite" you if you give me your email address. If you're not comfortable posting your email address here, you can email me at my generic email: becky_carney@comcast.net and give me your email address so I can "invite" you. . .

I am glad I found this info!! I am in that terrible waiting period between u/s. I cannot focus on anything else! I went in on mon. (this is my first) and found out I am 5w5d (I thought 5w6d...so real close!) and found out it is twins! I was so excited. They said it all looks good, but the hbs were low (94 and 96) The doctor was very open and said he was very optimistic, I don't go back until the 27th! The waiting is killing me! Any idea on twins??