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Hey sweetie- first of all take a long deep breath and TRY to relax a bit. You are definately on the right path to helping yourself by acknowledging/discussing your feelings and making an appointment with your doctor, but I think June 23 is WAY too long to wait. You need to call your doctor and explain to them how you are feeling and demand to get in by next week. Also, I know that you said you would rather not take medications, but they can work wonders ( as they did for me). I was put on prozac and noticed a huge change in about a week. Also, it sounds like you don't have any time for yourself, so remember that as long as your baby is fed, changed and otherwise taken care of don't be afraid to put her down and let her cry for a few minutes. Also, do you have a snuggli that you can wear your baby in? It might be a last resort, but if she has to be near you all the time, at least you could get a few things done without her crying. I'm not sure what else to suggest, but talking to your doctor will make you feel so much better. You are not alone, and you are NOT a bad mother!!!!!!! You should also post on the infant care site (if you haven't already). There are some wonderfully supportive people over there to talk to.

Personally, I don't think you needs meds (though your doctor should be the one to decide, officially, if you do), just a few deep breaths, and to mentally step back from the situation. Don't get me wrong, when you're in the thick of it, it seems like it'll never end, but it will...sooner than you realize, as time pa__ses much too fast and children grow up much too quickly. If it helps, some of what you wrote reminded me of when my first two (of my first four) children were younger. Unlike your son and your daughter, my first four children are roughly 2 years apart in age (some a little closer, some slightly farther apart). I also didn't have any family around to help, and to make matters worse, my former husband walked out on us, but I survived, and you will, too. In addition, I just became a mother again with my fifth child (second marriage). There's basically a generational age gap this time, though, as my first four children are adults (with the exception of the youngest being a few months short of adulthood). Anyway, try thinking of this the next time your daughter cries and needs you...she's doing so because she loves you DEARLY. Talk about ego strokes! Right now, you're basically her world. Where else would you be thought of so highly? Try to savor the VIP treatment, as with each day, she's getting closer to the day she'll be more independent. This is only a phase; literally keep reminding yourself of that, when you're feeling super stressed. By the way, your daughter sounds very similar to my oldest daughter who was also "colicky" as a baby. (Oddly enough, we learned when she was 13, that she has colitis.) My first child (my oldest son), much like yours sounds, was also an "easy" baby. I can recall noticing the difference, but as time goes on, you'll see the pluses and minuses of both of their temperaments. If all works well, their personalities can compliment each other, and I'd stronly recommend letting your son know that his sister "missed" him during his school day and loves it when he plays with her. It helps encourage a bond, which is good, and something I've always strived for with my own children (including with the latest addition). Aside from that, you might try, as JEN so wisely suggested, carrying your daughter in a Snugli pouch (I love those things!). Your daughter sounds like a very tactile baby, and that would help keep her happy. I've found with my fifth child (who just turned 3 mos. old), that he, too, loves a lot of touch (so do I, so it works well). But, trust me, what you're experiencing is a very brief phase in your daughter's life. As crazy as it may sound, chances are good that you'll, most likely, wish you could do it all over again someday. Best of luck, and hang in there!!!