Don T Like Boyfriend Husband Anymore

11 Replies
jenna32 - December 17

anyone disgusted with their boyfriend/husband more then before??? And all i care about is the baby and i don't want to share her with him at all. Maybe it's just him i don't want to i'm thinking, i don't mind quite a few people around her but certain people i am too protective about. Anyone going through something similar?

 

austynsmommy - December 17

Haha. That is how I felt after I had my son. My boy is now 15 months old. It will get better. It could just be your hormones.

 

jenna32 - December 17

when did it get better for you?

 

Krissy25 - December 19

I'm not disgusted with my dh but i know how you feel about sharing. For me when my dd is crabby and crying i have to have her and if my dh tries to comfort her i can't handle it b/c he's not doing it right but at the same time i'm resentful b/c i just want a break. So he just can't win, poor guy. It helps if i'm away or if i go out, even just for a walk b/c i can't hear her therefore in my mind she is fine. I don't know it's not really the same situation as you but i think all new moms go through something like that.

 

lmk - December 20

I know how you feel ... it's normal to be overprotective of your child and think that no one else can be as good to your lo. After all, you carried the baby for 9 mos and if you b___stfeed, then it's your body that's providing for his existence. However, I think it's important to absolutely involve your significant other even if you think you can handle it all yourself ... sooner or later, you're going to get burned out, and by that time your sign other may not be used to taking care of the baby. My dh does things differently, but I can trust him to do all those things like diapering, bathing, etc...all except feeding because he thinks he can watch tv at the same time as feeding the baby, and my son still won't take the bottle consistently...he really prefers the b___b, so whoever is coaxing him into the bottle needs to talk to him all the time.

 

jenna32 - January 4

actually krissy that is more how i feel, the whole sharing thing, that i have to hold her cuz he really doesn't do anything right, i'll think and critisize any little thing he'll do wrong and complain later that i have no time to do anything anymore, but i guess it could be a honest mistake for someone whos never taken care of a baby before. But at the same time i also don't want him touching me or kissing me or anything either.

 

jenna32 - January 6

like i don't know what to do, i am nuts, im starting to tell him shes not his!!

 

Krissy25 - January 6

Jenna it's totally normal to not want to be touched and kissed because after holding a needy baby all day long you just want some time to yourself, but try to look at it from his point too. He sees you holding the baby and giving all of your love to her and he wants some attention too. The two of you are going to have to be honest with eachother and try to make some crompromises. Try and come up with something that works for the 2 of you, like maybe after she goes to bed or is taking a nap the two of you just lay with eachother on the couch and have a gla__s of wine. It doesn't have to be exactly that but something where the 2 of you have some time everyday to connect a little. And maybe try to envoke a positive only comments rule where you can only say good things about one another, like "I really apperciated you doing the dishes tonight." (Hopefully he does things like that) It's just a way to change the mood in the house so that everyone is happier and the 2 of you can turn to eachother instead of away from eachother. And about your last post where you have been saying she is not his, unless that is true it is an awful thing to say and puts negative energy into the house. You can start the healing process by saying your sorry for making that comment and by telling him you don't really mean it you're just going through a difficult time now. I'm sorry if i am comming off as too pushy but it is so important to work as a team.

 

jazzy_jewellery - January 11

lol i was they same way for a while after my little girl was born and everthing her dad did i told dim UR NOT DOING IT RIGHT! some times i would not even want him holding her but i promise eventually you get over it, its just hormones

 

evae777 - February 6

I have just been getting sick of my husband. i have been very patient & in a pretty decent mood for someone who just gave birth. but when i am in a good mood he just has this look on his face that annoys me, just this unaffectionate look. then it puts me in a cold mood cuz i think that i dont' need to put up with him. i have been nice!! and of course he becomes nice when i am not. i wish he could just be nice all the time or at least when i am! it is such a bad vibe at home right now. i reallly wish i didnt have to be here so much. it bums me out to look at him sometimes. i just start giving up & not giving a c___p. along with trying to recover then his mom, who is this superficial overly chipper person, comes to visit without any notice. grrr...

 

KDR - February 6

I am going through the SAME thing. My ds is almost 4 months old and I am worried that I will NEVER like dh again. He works 10 hour days and complains of being tired but I am working full-time too and getting up with the baby during the night. I feed him (I am b___stfeeding), change him, take him to daycare, pick him up from daycare, pay for daycare... and still vacuum and clean if possible when i get home. I am exhausted. When i am sitting there bf ds my husband is sitting there like a lump on a log and it p__ses me off. I get so annoyed b/c he could be doing some of the housework or SOMETHING for crying out loud. Then he makes comments about s_x and I don't have any energy much less desire. So he tells me i am mean. I finally broke down and had s_x w/ him a few days ago but it was totally unenjoyable. HELP. I wonder when this will end.....

 

evae777 - February 6

i guess i had higher expectations about having a child and motherhood. I am only 2 weeks postpartum so maybe that is why i am feeling this way. but i am just not happy, can't say i am depressed though just annoyed. i all of a sudden do not like my living situation. dh does alot with the baby and even takes care of the overnight feeding for now since he goes back to work here on monday. i just don't feel like i have it together. plus i got Mast_tus and feel like c___p. LMK you are lucky, my baby does not want my b___b. Bfing has been hard, too much money has been spent on Lactations consultations. Then smarta__s DH thinks that he has it down more than i do. how can someone you love get on your nerves so much!! i look at him and get annoyed. his voice almost annoys me. then sometimes i like him, but that doesn't last. maybe the connection is dead? hopefully it is a phase. KDR, i think that way too, I am afraid I may never like him again. I don't get it this is suppose to be such a happy time. I almost feel out of place in my own home.

 

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