Is It Normal To Treat Him Like This

7 Replies
Kristin - March 1

My husband and I have been together for 2 years, married for almost 6 months. I am 19, he is 24, I am 14 weeks pregnant. He used to be the center of everything in my life, I loved to wake you to him, I loved to come home to him. But lately i just cant stand him, everything he does gets on my nerves, and I mean everything. Down to the smallest stuff like, if his friends are over. I get so upset inside and just feel like i wat to cry and i dont understand why. My thought is its probably just the pregnancy doing this to me?? Is this possible, I mean last night I told him that if he doesnt change that i wanted a divorce even though i know in my heart, that I cant live without him. DOes anyone else feel thid way?

 

Beth - March 1

ME, ME, ME . .I am not even married, I am angaged and I love him more than anything, but everything he does gets on my nerves and yet I still don't snap at him I am holding EVERYTHING inside and then last night I asked why he was being so distant towards me and he said that he knew I was pg and tired but that he felt that I was being distant with him and rejecting him (he meant in bed). I wanted to snap right then and tell him that not ony am I pg but he has three kids from a previous marraige and he takes them to school, but I get up at 4:45 in the morning to go to work, get off pick them all up, go to the store almost every day to get something to make for dinner, go home and make sure the kids do their homework, put up with their fighting with eachother and NOT doing their homework, all while making dinner for when he comes home from work and then tryign to do homework myself for the cla__s that I take.

 

stephanie - March 1

To Beth- I admire your hard work and dedication. Its alot for a woman or a man to take on someone elses children especially when theres more than 1.....2........Aaaahhhh 3 or more. I would definantly see to it that he does more around the house. I guess my question is....... If you don't mind? What are his hours of work? I mean does he work more than 8 hour shifts? I'm only asking b/c it does'nt seem as if hes helping out enough and you definantly don't want to get burned out?!?

 

Beth - March 1

Stephanie, he is a manager for a wherehouse store. because he has to take the kids to school he goes into work around 8:00am, no more opening shifts and getting off a little early. He does work more than 8 hours, there are some days he can get out around 8:30 and others anytime in between 5:30 and 7:00. He gets two days off a week just like most people but they are not always Sat and Sun and even on his days off (especially if they are days off during the week) he is still working ,he has meetings to attend to, people call him on his cell. . .

 

KJ - March 1

It is just the pregnancy. Think forst. You are married and are going to have a baby together. You as a couple need to stay together for your child.

 

Alma - March 1

I too am going through the same issues with my husband. He has two kids from a previous marriage. Don't get me wrong...I love those boys, but I'm just so tired! They come over almost every weekend. When they're with us I become they're personal taxi driver, chef, and nanny. I'm about four months along and I need my rest. My husband feels offended when I complain about anything that has to do wih his children. He thinks that I just don't care, or like them, which is totally untrue. I also get mad at him very easily. I don't like it when he has friends over or when he's not home when he should be. Everything about him annoys me to the point that I don't want him touching me. But I love him!! It's frustrating to feel this way towards someone I really love, but sometimes I don't think he really understands what I'm going through. I feel like I can't talk to him about his kids and how they act because he takes it as a personal attack against them. Any suggestions?

 

Beth - March 1

Yep Alma, thats how I feel, except the kids live with us full time and I would not have it any other way, but he does get upset. ..he doesn't say anything he just gets quiet and that how you can tell. Like last night after somewhat talking about how I "neglect" him I had to go return movies and in the car I started thinking about how trully tired I am, and when laying in bed when I got home I told him that I am just tired and it does not help when I have to tell the kids over and over to do something, like his 5 year old acting up at the store and not listening, he didn't say a d__n word he just layed there, which meant he was upset about me saying anything. :0( I feel like just turning over and crying myself to sleep.

 

tara - March 1

it's just the pregnancy. My cousin hated her husband during her first pregnancy, she couldn't even sit beside him for dinner...it made her feel really bad but they pulled through it. when you are feeling better tell him that it's the pregnancy that's doing this to you and it can be because you need more attention from him at times. Make him understand so that the next time you say something you don't really mean he doesn't take it as a personal attack on him and drive away. Good luck.

 

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