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Hey Bobbi, do you know when you're due? Are you going to find out what you're having? I bet this pregnancy is such a surprise to you, considering the time gap between your older children and this new little one. How did they react to the news? Are they excited?

Hi all, I just wanted to echo what Chris1975 said about the Europe thing, and say that to me it doesn't seem like women over there don't drink during pregnancy at all. My husband is Eastern European (we travel there almost every other year for a month or so. I've been about 5 times), and while his family does drink more than mine here in America, I know some of his relatives who have been pregnant abstained during their pregnancies, and it's definately not condoned...at least where my husband is from. Thanks guys, just wanted to point that out!

*hugs* Welcome to the forums, Bobbi. As you've already seen, alcohol is a hot b___ton topic here, it's just as bad as bringing up politics in other forums. The best you can really do is let the attacks roll off your back and pay attention to those that can express their opinions/advice in a respectful manner. I'm really glad to see your baby is doing ok, I must admit I initially freaked out along with you when I read your first post. You got really lucky! Do you know when you're going to be finding out the s_x yet?

You say you only drink a little ? Isnt your t_tle posted " heavy drinking " .....

Hi Bobbi, the thing is, you didnt know you were pregnant and so you were drinking, its not like you came on here and said "I drink heavily, im pregnant and I dont care" its not like that at all, but Ill tell you there are plenty of women out there that do have that att_tude, they drink, they smoke, they take all sorts of drugs and they just dont care, luckily you finally found out about the baby are now facing up to your responsibilty, and have stopped drinking! You've had your u/s and baby is fine, so congrats on your pregnancy and goodluck :)

I have read the thread and my concern is that bobbi quit drinking entirely. She stated she had been drinking, "a bottle of wine a night and a few hot whiskeys". It sounds to me that she has a problem and needs some support. Bobbi, why were you drinking SO MUCH? That amount is extremely excessive, and worrysome. I very much hope that you will not pick up drinking again after the baby is born. If you are not an alcoholic than it should be easy for you? Maybe there is a treatment program in your area for pregnant women, that would probably be a good idea. I know you must feel attacked, but honestly, what did you expect would happen? As mothers(or soon to be) It is very upsetting to accept your situation, especially for those on the forum that have been trying for months for a baby, taking clomid, injections, IVF, or whatever fertility measures they have been taking. You have to understand that too. None of us want to be nasty or make you feel any worse than you probably do, but it just makes most of us very emotional and even angry, that you would be given a baby while others who are following all the rules so to speak are denied the opportunity to be mothers. Again, please get help.

I just wrote a huge post to al the women here casting stones and thought twice about posting it. haha Bobbi, no one can tell you if the baby is damaged right now except by maybe an u/s. make sure to let your doc know ok. Good luck hun and just brush all this dirt off your shoulders and start doing what you can now. GL!!

FAS or FAE are not detectable by u/s. I am not trying to scare you...at my 22 week u/s the expert renowned u/s specialist told me my daughter had a chromosonal defect or some kind of toxic exposure because the width of her head measured below the 3rd percentile. To make a long story short she was 100% perfect and healthy. So much for u/s and the expert men behind the machine.

Heck they can't even detect Down's Syndrome via ultrasound. Yes there are "markers", but from reading this forum one can see how WRONG they such predictions are...meaning both ways. The dr tells you he thinks your child has DS and it doesn't or vice versa.

I think we should drop the topic unless Bobbi comes on here and says that her child has problems. So far, everything is checkign out A-okay according to Bobbi. I hope that if and when she ever comes back to this board and hopefully not with a sad subject line, that we'll be here to support her with positive energy.

I'll second that...

they recommend a GLASS not a bottle....& as for ' i wasnt that drunk every night that i couldnt function' thats what every single alcoholic i know said before admitting they had a problem. every one. best of health to you and your baby.

Great suggestion newlywed

Hi. I just wanted to add my point of view. I´m EUROPEAN. British to be precise and I live in Spain. I don´t know where Americans get their facts from, but you´re making us all out to be raging alcoholics. I knew to stop drinking as soon as I found out I was pregnant, but I was only drinking once or twice a week (2 or 3 gla__ses of wine) anyway. No-one around here suggests to pregnant women to drink, if fact quite the opposite. All information you all get is exactly the same info we get. No, a gla__s of wine or a beer once in a while will not harm your baby, binge and heavy drinking MAY harm your baby, so it´s best to try a cut right down to be on the safe side. Phew rant over hehe.

Hi Emily, I have to agree! While I'm not European, my husband is, and every time I have visited his family (we go about every other year for a month or so) I've never seen any pregnant women in his family drink. In fact, his cousin and his second cousin who were pregnant at our last visit seemed well informed of the fact that they shouldn't, and didn't have any alcohol or smoke that I saw. I actually think that drinking over there goes on about as much as it does here. Honestly, because of planes and the internet etc. access to medical information is really the same, culture aside!

Bobbi, I don't know if you still read this forum or not if it's still rolling but I just joined this forum and read what everyone had to say. I think it's awesome that you have quit drinking once you found out you were pregnant. I turn 21 next month and it has crossed my mind to have a gla__s of wine, but I have been talked out of it thank god. I understand what you are going through as I was a heavy smoker before I was pregnant. Some people may think I'm a bad mother because I was smoking and TRYING to get pregnant. I understand mistakes and I think that since you can't sleep and are worried you are already going through enough. Obviously you have regret, and you are worried and I believe those are signs of a good mother. And the fact that you quit after you found out you were pregnant is a very good sign. I'm not going to judge you on the two kids you already have because I am not a judgemental person and I believe no one knows what you go through unless they are in your exact shoes. I am very glad to hear that you baby is fine and mostly that you are doing good also. I wish you the best and I'm always here for support if you need it. I only believe in positive reinforcement. What is done is done, and in your case, you didn't even know you were pregnant.