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We're unmarried and the biodad doesn't want anything to do with me or the child. He's even said things that make me think he'd give up his rights as a father if I were to marry someone else and the new guy wanted to adopt the child.
So now I'm single and pregnant, and eager to start dating again...but I'm pregnant. Have any of you started dating again while pregnant? Or plan to start dating about 3-4 months after the baby is born? Im terribly lonely, and have wanted a good relationship for a long time and it has eluded me. I would not be doing it for the child's sake, but for my sake! I miss s_x, I miss companionship, I miss someone I can depend on and have emotional intimacy with.
I know it's going to be harder to find someone once I have this baby, but is it impossible? It's true I'd like to provide a 2-person family for the child, but that would be icing on the cake.
Any advice?
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Good god, I think you have enough on your plate. As for missing companionship, someone you can depend on and experience intimacy with, that's what you should have been seeking while a single girl, before getting pregnant (harsh, but true). As you said, you're lonely now, and you're just scared... realizing you'll be going this alone. And realizing things aren't going to be as you'd hoped is bringing you down. But put dating plans on the backburner. You do sound like a nice girl... when things are in place in your life, the rest will fall into place. Good luck to you. :-)
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btw, as for thinking you'll have a difficult time meeting someone after you have a baby, my Mother was widowed years ago with a small child, and she met the most wonderful man who she went on to marry. I could name a dozen similar stories that I know of, and probably man others on this board could do the same. There are plenty of great guys out there, it's recognizing the right type. ;)
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Hey, I just wanted to say thanks for this post, because I am feling just like you are right now and alot of people don't understand. Alot of people are married and happy and pregnant, and it seems like the single girl who gets pregnant just has to deal with all her normal human wants and suffer for some months! Well, while I can completely relate to what you are going through, and I am counting down the days till this baby gets outta me! I think I can honestly say that I have yet to meet the guy who wants to date a woman who is pregnant with a kid that isn't his. But trust me, as I know from experience, that there are a ton of guys who won't mind dating you afterwards and who love kids. Being a single mom doesnt make you unattractive to men, actually it makes you look strong if you are doing what you need to do. So, all I can say is goodluck and just try to focus on you and pamper yourself right now,just love yourself up! That is what I am doing for now, and when I need someone to cuddle with I call a friend to come over and watch movies or go out on a "date", just love yourself right now.
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hi *ghandel*. That really sucks that the father doesn't want anything to do with the child. I'm really sorry to hear that. I am also single but I know that the father of my child will love it very much, even though he doesn't seem to care about me. I can totally relate to your wishes for companionship. Truth is the only person you can depend on is yourself. And family if your as lucky as me. Of course you want to provide a 2 person family for your child, i think we all do. It is NOT impossible for you to find love with a baby. But for now I agree with *Del86*. Focus on yourself and try to surround yourself with loving friends. As for the lack of s_x, no advice there! I have more of a s_x drive than i have ever had in my life and no-one to share it with!! But I'm not looking. You don't need the extra stress of a new relatonship right now.
How far pregnant are you?
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I have to agree with danii on all points especially the one about the s_x drive...and someone was really interested in just having a s_x relationship with me last week and I just couldn't see doing that I started worring about all the effects it could have on my unborn child...such as if the condom didn't work and I contracted something he didn't even know he had. And Ghandel I know the heart ache of knowing your ex doesn't want anything to do even with the child...the whole reason we broke up is because I refused to get an abortion so my ex up and packed his bags after 2 years of being together and just left...I tried for about two months to get him to at least be there for his son but he refused to talk to me at all I am now 7 months pregnant and I know deep down inside that my son wont have his biological father at all and that is what hurts the most...though I would say having companionship comes in second. Then S_x!!!
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I'm in a slightly different situation than some of you are, but yet similar too. I am eight and half months pregnant, single and will be raising the baby on my own. I, too, would some day like to maybe date, find the right guy and settle down, but it's hard to think about when you're pregnant and alone trying to make it. My baby never really had a father, because she is the result of a s_xual a__sault, and so I haven't really found the interest in dating yet, but someday I will. And I'd like to know how people manage to juggle all of it. I'm a student set to graduate in Dec, I'm going to be working fulltime to support my child on my own, and trying to take care of the child....how do you find time to date or find someone????
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Wow, FirsttimemommyinTx, that's tough. I wouldn't have wanted to go through with the pregnancy in your situation... or maybe I would have, I don't know, but it would have been VERY difficult finding out I was pregnant under those circ_mstances. And yeah, dating would be the last thing on my mind, but I hope you have some good male friends around anyway.
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Don't give up pn dating yet. My brother started to date his wife when she was 5 months pregnant. They have been married now for 4 years. My brother takes care of her 3 children who he plans to adopt as soon as they can find bio dad, and they have a 2 year old son.
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i dated two guys for a VERY short time (like a matter of a week or two) while i was pregnant with my daughter. after i had her i dated a guy or two, but it was always jerks who wanted one thing, and they never wanted anything to do with my daughter. i, too, am lonely. i'm 3 months pregnant with baby #2. i dont see anyone ever wanting to date me while i am pregnant or raising 2 kids that arent theirs, i dont know... its very depressing.
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Don't give up on dating. There are guys out there, like myself, that would enjoy the company of a pregnant lady. You are not fat or unattractive. You are pregnant, glowing with new life and quite attractive. Some people would even say...s_xy. Being pregnant is the ultimate in being a woman. I am single, in the St. Louis, Missouri area and cannot have any children, so, I have been seeking a lady such as yourself. I am seeking a long-term relationship, accepting the ups and downs, the late night cravings, feedings or illnesses, for better or worse. You always hope for the better, though. Feel free to contact me directly or any other ladies that read this.
Take care, Keith
-yahoo messenger - stargazing_mustanglover -
kdbrady63301 at sbcglobal dot net
636-233-1221
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My boyfriend has been living with me since I was 3 months. I'm now 9 months. He's the one who's rubbed my back, my feet, kissed and talked to the baby at night and put all of the baby things together ect..... The only difference with me is the real father wants to be in my sons life, and my boyfriend doesn't want that. I honestly don't want that either, but I have to think of what's best for my son. Despite my situation, If there's not somebody in your life that you were friends with prior to the pregnancy. I don't reccomend trying to meet somebody during, pregnant woman happen to be some mens fantasy, and you may end up getting used. There's just as many men who are willing to step up and be with a woman who has a child or even several as there are seeking women without kids. I understand that you're feeling lonely, wanting to be held etc... And your best bet will be to find someone who would do all of those things, spend time with you, and respect you enough to wait until the baby is born or you can tell him that to see where his intentions really are and after a few months go for it, but be safe and make sure he gets tested.
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Foxxy...I have to agree with you to a point. There are some guys out there that are wanting just one thing. Then, there are guys like me, who cannot have any children and are yearning for the chance to experience the whole process of pregnancy in addition to raising the children, which is a whole other concept...giving ma__sages...rubbing the belly, feeling the baby respond to your touches, ma__saging the tired feet and the sore back, the morning sickness, the late night cravings, getting all of the baby things together...the clothes, crib, car seat and stroller, etc., talking to the baby, being there to see the baby (sonogram) for the first time, experiencing the miracle of birth and wanting to be a part of the child's life, even though they may not be biologically tied together. I don't know if your boyfriend is able to father children, but he seems to be a bit like me, someone who is willing to step up to the plate when the biological father won't.
Don't lump us all together just because we are male. Some of us males do have scruples and morals and the natural yearning to have a family, just like women. One difference is that women, when they want to have a baby...basically, they need only have the sperm, which can be obtained naturally or from a bank, either way, a donor. Guys on the other hand...have only the sperm and have no way to put it with the egg and incubate it for 9 months. So, we have less of a chance to experience the process. Especially guys like me who have no sperm. That's why I have been seeking out someone that is already pregnant or willing to get pregnant by a means other than the natural way with me. I'm 43 and not getting any younger and generally the ladies my age already have all the children they want or for one reason or another, cannot have any or feel that due to age, it is too risky. Another reason why I have been seeking ladies younger than myself.
I'm sorry if I seemed to get on my soapbox. It's just frustrating for me. Again, Foxxy and the other ladies out there, I am sorry for doing that. I just hope you understand just how pa__sionate I am about the situation. If you have any advice for me, I am open to hear it. Thanks and good luck. Take care, Keith
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Im dating and im in my 2nd trimester.. If the guy is worth your time he wont care that you are pregnant.. I had a date last Friday with this amazing guy who couldnt be more perfect for me. The only problem with him is that he is in the marines and has to go back to his base in California on the 16th and wont be back again til xmas time (we live in NH) I would wait for him though, like I said, hes just so perfect for me.
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bla bla bla mr lonely now the liar's even posting his phone number - ladies give him a call and give him a piece of your mind for being a lying piece of sc_m... see my other reply busting him out under his other post looking to date a pregnant woman, this troll is simply looking for free advertising to complement his profiles on the casual s_x and alternative dating sites, alt and adult friendfinder where you can find him as preggo_pleaser - looking for pregnant or lactating women for s_x, and also he claims he's 33. Just don't fall for this BS ladies...
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