Hubby Doesnt Want The Baby

7 Replies
somegurl - May 31

Me and my husband were seperated when I found out I was pregnant. We have been married for a year and 4 months but we have been off and on and living together for 5 years, and friends since age 10. I have always known he didnt want children, he asked me to get an abortion, and I even made the appointment, but couldnt go thru with it. We talked when we first found out, he stayed with me for a day or two, and he talked about going thru this with me, he said he had a big decision to make, he ran thru the scenarios, us raising the baby, him getting another job, him being a stay at home dad, getting a house, things like that. then the next day, he went back to his mom and emailed me saying he didnt wish to be a part of this. It has been 6 months, i have left him several voicemails, he never returns my call. he finally had his voicemail cut off. i am going thru this all alone, and I just dont understand how someone could not want their own child. now i am stuck with the decision of giving her his last name or not. I just dont know what I am goign to do, or how I am going to do this. I am independent, I have lived on my own for 8 years now and I have a good job. He has never left his mom. His sister stays in touch with me, and blames this all on his mom. she thinks he may come around eventually, but then again she says he may just never leave his mom, and his mom is the type woman that doesnt have anything to do with even her own daughter, or two grandsons. Im just so lost, and confused. I hate him, but I love him. He has missed so much already in our baby's life. I think I am in denial, I think he may show up when I have her, or come see us later on. But then i know he may not. I just dont know what I am suppose to do. Give her his last name even though he doesnt want her, and wanted her aborted? He obviously doesnt care right? or he would be calling to check on her. I just dont know what Im thinking or what I am going to do.

 

oct19bad - June 1

I am in the same boat as you. I am so dissapointed in him yet i still love him and miss him. If mine does come around which i sereiously think he will not. I dont think i can take him back, He has turned his back on me and our child and that is something i know i can not ever get over. I wish you the best of luck. Stay strong, God will not give you something that you can not handel. The soul that see beauty must some times walk alone.

 

samantha_2629 - June 1

My boyfriend and I have been together on and off for about 3 years now, but things got really bad about the middle of my pregnancy. We still talk often but usually end up in a fight. It's really hard. I know I don't have to tell you all, but I mean all the hormones and everything, it just makes it so much harder to deal with. He's missed out on so much and even tho he continues to screw up, I can't help but love him. I wish I could be strong and tell myself not to jump for joy when he calls....but I can't. I'm so weak when it comes to him. I just crumble. I pray alot. And I feel stronger when I do. I say what oct19bad said alot to help get me thru the really hard times.....God doesn't give us more than we can handle. So you'll get thru this. Just be strong, time will help

 

somegurl - June 17

I printed the email he sent me telling me he could never be happy with me even with a baby. I keep it folded and in my purse, when i get to missing him, I just pull it out and remind myself he doesnt love us! It is helping. I just wish my baby didnt have to go thru this.

 

Bilmes123 - June 18

Well my situation is different, I fell in love with this guy at work, we started dating and then I found out I was pregnant. Told him and all he replied was...."are you on birthcontrol" which I was but it obviously did not work. And that was pretty much the last I heard from him....he wont return my messages or anything....

 

bluezy411 - September 3

oct19bad thanx for those words of encouragement, u almost had me crying there and i don't do so often. am in the same situation but i hv learnt 2 put me and my baby before all else. best of luck somegurl

 

oct19bad - September 3

No Problem hang in there! It gets better once you feel their cute little kicks. sad cause you want to share the joy but call you mom or best friend instead.

 

MALAYA - September 29

Its been a few moths and just wondering how are you doing with your situation???? I hopw all is well!!!

 

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