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I don't know if anyone remembers me.... I posted "Boyfriend Unaware". I got back with my first love 4 years ago, he left his g/f who had a daughter to someone else and moved in with me. He also had a daughter who lived with her mother who he had access to. She was born 5 years after i had our son adopted, when we were 16y.o. Our plans were to marry and have a family.....so i thought! After TTC for 18mths I got pregnant, he told me to get rid or he would leave. I had a termination and it broke my heart.....Last Dec we bought a house, but at the last minute he backed out and i had to find the full deposit myself and i took on the mortgage alone. We moved in 2gether but in February he became angry, moody, started to go out drinking and not coming home,he was really awful saying that he didn't want the house, the dog, etc that i didn't pull my weight around the house - this continued for over 3 months when i found out in May that he had been having an affair with an old school flame. He had of course denied it for months, even when i saw his car outside her house, he still denied it. Anyway he decided he wanted to stay with me and finished it with her. In July I found out i was pregnant and he flipped saying i'd done it on purpose and that he would kill me and the baby if i didn't terminate. Again he started staying out at night, denying that he was seeing someone...(deja vue!!!) Anyway, this has continued since july until now. Last week i found out that he has started to rent a house and has been spending his time buying new furniture etc and I am now 6+ months pregnant and facing the prospect that any day now he will be gone - i will just get home to find his stuff gone! Probably Christmas Eve. My dad died on the 13th November this year, suddenly, and although my b/f came to the funeral, he stayed out the night he died and the night after, just when i needed some support. I now feel so empty and alone even though i keep telling myself it's for the best for me and my baby. He says he will continue to help me with the mortgage and that he may change his mind about us when the baby comes, but until then he wants to live alone ( i think he may have someone else already). I am constantly wondering what will happen when the baby does come, but deep down i feel that this is the last i will see of him. I just feel so so low - things surely cant get any worse!