Mentally Unstable Father Wants To Take My Child

4 Replies
kendriak - August 5

Hi ladies. I am in deperate need of some kind of advice. I am 28 years old and 32 weeks pregnant. I have other children who I take care of full time. My unborn baby's father is 24 and this is his first child. He got upset with me because I don't want to be with him so he threatening to take our baby from me. This guy has some mental issues. He talks about killing himself at least twice per week when things don't go his way. I also found out that he was cheating on me with a 14 year old girl. He hasn't even told his family that he has a baby on the way let alone that he even had a girlfriend. His strategy for taking the baby is taking me to court to take custody of the baby, if he doesn't win he's gonna keep taking me to court until I am broke and can't care for our son and my other kids. I am currently not working considering my 5 year old son has Autism and I don't plan on working until he goes to kindergarten which will be this year. I am currently dating someone else who I have known and dated off and on for the past 18 years. I don't want my baby's father to take my son away. That would crush me. Tell me what should I do?

 

Franny - August 5

Unless you are proven to be mentally unstable yourself or have some criminal history he would never get more than the 50% custody he is ent_tled to as a father. I am just curious, what did you see in this guy to begin with...? Was he always a bit off or is this just a recent turn of events? How many other children do you have and how do you take care of them....this might come into account...?

 

kimberly - August 6

He can't take away your parental rights unless he can prove you to be an unfit mother. Just make sure you get a good lawyer and that you let them know you feel he is mentally unstable. He is probably just making threats anyway. I seriously doubt he will go through with any of it. But, just in case you need to be prepared. As Franny said he can't get more than the 50% custody unless you are proven unfit. I would however have a job and show you can support you and all of your children alone. If you are living with your new boyfriend and are not married, you shouldn't. I say that because when my dh and I filed for custody of my step son, one of the things that came up against her was she was living with her boyfriend and wasn't married. They really look down on that in these kind of cases. I am sorry your son has autism and I am sure it would be hard to find someone qualified to watch him for you while you work, but if it were me I would try to find a way to work, unless you have some kind of other money coming in that supports you and your kids. And I mean money other than what your boyfriend or parents give you. Like a trust or something of that nature. If he really wants to get nasty all of that can make you look unfit even if you are a good mother. Good Luck!

 

Mommytobe3 - September 1

Agree with the other ladies also you have to doc_ment everything if he's sending you text or email or leaving message saying he's gonna kill himself keep them just anything im not a mommy to be anymore lol me n my sons father went to court he threatened me he was taking me for half custody he ended up giving up but i had a lawyer n the lawyer said save everything and you dont do anything to make yourself look bad just ignore him be the bigger person and with the court stuff and the money many states have programs where they will give you a pro bono lawyer if your income is low or you can go in a represent yourself i think thats all i got for now

 

raex - November 11

he has to prove hes a better parent and judging by your post i dont think anyone would give him full custody, seek legal advice, they will do reports on him with the child and also on you which should be supervised,he may get visits but if you can show hes violent or unpredictable and unstable you have nothing to worry about, i had the same problem with my ex and my4 children i have full custody x

 

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