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sorry about the speeling mistakes yuol have to read between the lines abit..;) have not seen him since 10 weeks..

Consult a lawyer - since he is a drug addict I doubt the courts will take your baby from you and give it you him - courts usually side with the mother unless there is something wrong wth her. However, he can go to the court and have them order a DNA test for next to nothing in cost so that b__wes your $1000 barrier away. If anything, come clean, tell him it's his and you don't want anything to do with him. (After consulting a lawyer) get a restraining order - DOCUMENT these calls he is making to your sister and to your work. Hope it helps.

Because you two are not married he can have all of the court dates he wants he can be on the birth certificate or whatever he wants but YOU have primary care over the child, he will then have to pay child suport which is deserved to you even though you dont want it the court will then order it after he is proven to be the father. honestly you dont need a lawyer if he takes it to family court they will pick you over him and most likely denie him the right to see his child if he is a substance abuser. in cases where the two people having a child are not married the mother is granted primary care giver of the child. I dont think you have to much to worry about in this case i have some paper work about some of these issues some place that i should find soon if you want to email me you are more than welcome to maren2005@hotmail.com

thanks girls for your replys.. but my main concern is if the courts do order a dna and it will come back positive.. wont that make me look bad in the judges eyes.for ling about the baby in then first place.? I am really lookin out for the babys future not mine...

If this man as as horible as he sounds, i honestly dont think the judge will care if you lied to a substance abuer!!!! I mean who wants there child around that type of person. For all the judge knows you were just unsure of who the father was and didnt want this man to even think about it.

yea .. i hope they see it that way. I think its the stage in my pregnacy where I get parinoid about the future..... timing is everything......

Ya know Jennifer the laws are funny on protecting are kids and they want to wait until something phyissically happens to them by that certain parent to care. But you did what you felt you had to do. I never would have had the guts to do that do my ex with our kids, but he is no role model and i am scared like he** for my kids moraly and physically for many reasons. But just pray that this guy will leave you alone. I completly agree about the support and just have him out of your baby's life. I wish you luck, maybe you should start saving for a lawyer and checking on the laws in your state. Good luck.

i told my sis to tell him I am marrieing the makebelef father...... just hopefully he'll go OD or somthing..disappear forever.......

Jennifer... you really need to stop lying to this guy. Yes, it will look bad that you've been lying.. even if you thought this was best in order to protect your child. Yes, the court WILL grant him a DNA test if he asks for it (but then the state will make him pay you child support). and Yes, he WILL get visitation if he wants it. You can't stop any of that. What you CAN do... is stop lying and work with the father. Can you prove that he's a drug abuser? and what kind of drugs does he use? If you can show SOLID PROOF that he does drugs (they won't just order a drug test on suspicion.. there must be evidence), then he will only be allowed supervised visits. If you can't show proof, then it'll probably be phased-in visiation.. which means a few months supervised visitation in your home, then he'll be able to start taking the baby for a few hours a couple days a week and that will eventually lead to overnights. It is very very unlikely that this baby will be taken away from you unless he can prove you to be unfit (which is very very VERY hard to do). and SA was right... DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. Write down the date, time, and what was said of EVERY conversation that you have... and that him and your sister have. And most of all LYING IS GOING TO MAKE EVERYTHING WORSE... I can guarantee it. It's time to be an adult and deal with your problems the honest grown-up way.

yea thanks for you advise this is a free opionated forum which i can accept.. i am an adult.. have raised three other kids with a abusive father.. so i think i know what I am doing. anything i can to avoid haveing him be a part of the babies life ... so ill be doing it my way.. and if it back fires worst thing that can happen is he will have to take the dna test. and will be granted his rights but will have to pay for them.. the baby is the one that looses in the end.. but i havent gone through all this for nothing .. sorry but i am sticking to my story.......

i guess i just think its harsh to lie to him, regardless of what your past relationship was like. fact is, you should give him the opportunity to get it together for his child. you should give your child the opportunity to have a dad. maybe it won't work out but you have to at least give him a chance..the baby is as much his as it is yours. that said, you don't need to be in a relationship with him or anything. i would just be honest with the guy. tell him that you know about the drugs, that you are worried for the baby and that if he really wants to be a part of this baby's life that he'll have to get it together. obviously he cares or he wouldn't continue to hara__s you. i just don't think it's fair, to him or to your child, to lie.