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Good for you. I'm glad that your daughter is healthy. And its sad that the wife had to give that kind of a choice..no one should have to choose between two people..mostly if its a child in the ultimatium...its sad that she couldn't be an adult and accept the fact that her husband did betray her...and dont give him back that trust..it needs to be earned..and dont fall for cheap lies like purposal if he does...i'm sure he loves you..but if he would do that to his wife..you have to be careful that he doesn't do it to you..but i'm sure you'll find a solution and work everything out. I'm proud of you for standing your ground with his wife. its a difficult situatino..and I think your going to handle it well.

I do wanna caution you!!! I am glad it is all working out and i am sorry he did this to his wife BUT once a cheater always a cheater. Be careful hun and dont let him screw you again. No pun intended. But you dont need the heartache. And i dont wanna see you get hurt. Take it slow is my advice. Dont jump headfirst into another relationship with him. Take time and become friends first then see where you go. Good Luck!! and congrats on your daughter!!!

I'm glad your situation worked out.. Mine, went the opposite way.. My daughter's father and I were together before and throughout my pregnancy.. There were problems but we stuck together.. It all fell apart when my daughter was 10 days old.. We are now in the middle of a very ugly litigation b/c his wife (who took him back after knowing everything) will not let him see his child and gave him an ultimatium.. He took the other route and decided not to be a part of our daughters life.. I'm not here to be judged but regardless of how my daughter got here, she is here.. I hope all works out for you.

Madison1118...I'm sorry that he choose his wife, but like i said..Its not right or fair to have an ultimatium involving a child because everyone loses in the end. He will regret it his whole life..and some day you will find someone who loves you and wants to be a father to your child. keep your chin up and just enjoy speding every moment with your daughter.

I've always loved that name, Samantha. I was going to write some words of wisdom, but I think Jennifer_33106 worded it better than I could. I agree with taking it slow and becoming friends first. He really betrayed your trust as well as his wife's trust. Even though you share a child together, start over from scratch. He needs to prove to you he is trustworthy, and regardless of what he says, only time will prove that. Don't let him sweet talk you into what you want to hear. Let his actions speak to his true feelings. At the very least, I hope he is a good father to your daughter, regardless of whether you and he further your relationship. Good luck to you : )

"his wife doesnt want to accept the baby or me in his life".... his wife has NO REASON to want to accept you or your child in her life. If placed in the horrible situation this woman has been put in, I too would tell him to leave. Hopefully your situation works out Hawaiiangel.. but somehow I think it probably won't. Good luck in the future -- I know you were unaware that he was married when you became pregnant, so I certainly don't place blame with you. Hopefully you'll find someone worthy of you and Samantha.. my instincts tell me it's not this guy, though. My advice: Don't spend years trying to build what you want from something that's not there. (hey, I should write fortune cookies!)

Thanks Preciousbaby19.. I agree that ultimatiums involving children are a lose/lose situation.. I'm more worried about having to explain to my daughter about her father than how I will be.. I know I will be fine.. I have been b/c he hasn't been involved since she was a month old..My daughter is such a happy baby, it breaks my heart sometimes to know that one day I will have to figure out how to prepare her for a life without her biological father..

good job homewrecker

WHOA! hawaiiangel, this is a dificult situation! did he have kids with his ex wife? how long were they married? what was his explanation for hiding this to you? how are you so sure that he wont do this to you? my dad always said.."what a man is willing to do FOR you, hes willing to do TO you." i wish you luck and congrats on your baby girl!

your Dad's words are words to live by !

Hula girl..Uncalled for and billsgirl those are very wise words by your father.

Precious . . . apparently you don't know Hula. She knows her comment was uncalled for and that is why she said it. I happen to agree. ((not that anyone asked)) :)

Nah I dont know her.and neither does the poster. Its sad that she has to be doing that on a support forum. Anyway to those who are in this situation I hope that everything works out.

precious baby...its not a support forum, its real life pregnancy and life issues, support forums exist out there such as allaboutcounseling for eg........here u will hear the truth i guess, i do believe what starts wrong ends wrong and agree with others that if he can do it to her.. then there is nothing stopping him from doing it to you....... it sounds like u would be better off without a man of this calibre who cheats, lies and betrays, personally u would not trust him out of your sight... the lady who gave the ultimatim is the lucky one imo cause she is rid of a cheat, she can now live in peace no longer being made a fool of......i think any woman knowing a man is married should walk away once she knows, i wish u well with your little girl and i hope this man doesn't hurt u the same way u both hurt his ex partner, i am sorry if its harsh, i am not a fan of cheating husbands or b'friends cause my little ones dad is one also and we r both lucky as he is now cheating on his current partner rather than me..... all the best

WHOA WHOA WHOA!!!! I have to jump in here. First of all had you people read her first post she had no idea that he was married til after she was pregnant. He didnt clue her in to that. So stop stop stop being so d__n judgemental.