Very Confused Need Advice Soon
6 Replies
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I just found out I'm pregnant. My boyfriend of 5 months is black (i'm white) and he is super religious. My parents just met him last weekend at my birthday party and they liked him. I wasn't sure if my dad would like him because he is black. If they found out what religion he is they will probably not want me to be w/ him. Anyways, here's the problem: I love him, but we are very new. I've had an abortion in a previous relationship and morally I don't have a problem w/ it. He on the other hand does and really wants this baby, and also told me he will leave me if I have an abortion. A lot of my friends are happy I'm pregnant. My sister is the only one that has brought me down to reality and really made me question if it is right to have this baby. By the way, my parents don't know yet. There are so many things up against me and my boyfriend: my parents, his religion, we work together and no one knows about us, and we have only been together for a short time. Do I risk bringing a child in this world because I do love him? I don't want to be a single mom if things don't work out. I want to be married when I have a child. My heart tells me I can't do this, but I love him. I might have to lie to him and have the abortion anyway and say its a miscarriage. Can I live with that lie? Any advice would be helpful. Thanks.
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Don't lie. That is one of the worst lies you could possible tell. Pretending to have a miscarriage when you actually had an abortion is not okay. He is just as much a part of the decision to have the child as you are. You said that you were worried because you don't know if it will work out and you guys have not been together for that long. You need to talk with your boyfriend and decide what is right for the two of you. Probably the best thing that you can do is to sit down with him and write out a list of pros and cons and really make a decision together. Your parents really do not and should not have any say in whether or not you have a child, depending on your age. Good Luck to you.
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Loving Christian couple wishes to openly adopt! We are a secure and stable couple wishing to make our family of three grow by two little feet! http://www.adoptionprayer.com
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So confused--, I am pregnant also....only I am at week 16 now. I had (still do) a lot of things going against me also. I'm young (still in school), wasn't with my guy long either, & we are not & will not be together...To be honest, I never considered abortion. I think it is definately the mother's right to choice, but I just know that I could personally never abort. If you choose to, please be sure it is what your heart is telling you. I have always believed that everything happens for a reason...though it sometimes may not make sense to us. My dream was to ALWAYS have my first child by my husband (first & only husband!) but as time has gone on (speaking of life in general) I have realized several times that life does not always go as planned.. I think that if you truly love this man, then you will consider his feelings on this subject too. For someone who does not believe in abortion at all, it can be extremely devastating to experience....I think that if you really imagine this child inside of you as part of you, you will understand how wonderful a baby can be....let us know what you decide. Either way, best of luck.
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i would love to adopt u child if that what u choose at the end, i would keep it open and u still can be a part of him/her life if u wont to get back to me email me kate_wee22@yahoo.com
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never mind all the adoption this is ur choice do what u want to do, , take a minute write things down the pros and cons of having a child, spk w/ a counsler make sure u will be okay if you decide to have an abortion this is ur choice ur body you are the only one in control. take a day off work spk w/ ur boyfriend and if he wants to leave you then obviously he really doesn't love you, i once had an abortion and now i am preg, and keeping the baby, again it's ur choice do what u feel is right ur family will come arnd they will support snd love you, it will be tough at first. i wish you all the best god bless and take care.
much luv
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i hope everything is going well, please give us an update
good luck
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