Why Didn T I See This Coming
9 Replies
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I met this wonderful guy - the man of my dreams. We dated for 9 months. I became pregnant after 3 months. This is my first baby and he has 4 others by 4 different women. He's a great father to his other children. He claims that he was never in a "relationship" with the other mothers of his children. He says that he loves me but he can't do this relationship. I feel that things were going well until I found out I was pregnant. I am 6 months pregnant and he's decided that this relationship isn't going to work. He said he'll be there for the baby. We planned this pregnancy and now we're not together. WHAT SHOULD I DO? Should I give up on us having a relationship or should I continue to pursue him because I love him and I want a family? He asked me to let him keep the baby and I can visit on the weekends. This would be a tremendous help financially, but I can't see myself giving him custody. Any thoughts or advice?
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 | apr - December 24 |
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hello. I am so sorry you have to go through that. personally, any man who has different kids from 4 different wives, is bound to stay that way and do the same to others which included YOU! He'll probably continue doing that to other women after you, make them feel all loved, and hey presto! once they are pregnant and happy to be part of a family, he says he cant continue his relationship! thats called a ''sperm donor''. Reminds me of K-Fed! This man you love so much, obviously does not love you at all. He has been using u, and now when you are pregnant, he finds some other hot lady out there to get his pants off! I really dont think this guy is stable at all, and I personally wouldnt give up my child to someone like him. Obviously you have to make the decision which is right for you. I wish you lots of luck!
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I wouldnt GIVE the baby to him no matter what that is your baby he decided to have the baby and then leave the relationship. He has doen this b4 he may be a good dad to his ther kids but this is your 1st and you will not want to aprt from your baby
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Once you look at that little one you won't want to give him up for any reason!
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He just says he wants the baby to gain time. When the baby comes, I bet he'll be singing a different tune just like he did for your "planned pregnancy."
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Leave him alone and keep your baby. You could get him out of your life all together by telling him you had an abortion and moving away from there. I am sure you have a support system that will hlep you take care of you and baby's needs.
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OH Geeze Ashles613 what lovely advice!!! I hope you aren't planning this as well!! Yeah, lie and run away instead of stepping up to the plate and trying to make something positive out of it for the sake of your child. Anyway, You both got pregnant and both know very well who the father is. Now the best thing to do is try to work with these men and have them in some sort of shape and form be part of their child's life. Babymama, at least it sounds like this guy wants to take responsibility. Mabye joint custody...? Now this won't be the family you dreamed of, but at least your child will have a live where both mom and dad are dedicated to him or her. Do you have contact with his family (parents)...do they know of their new grandchild on the way...?
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keep the baby! He wanted to walk away for a reason . Be the best mother that you can be and if he is gonna help you out then that is great, but try your best to move on emotionally
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You mentioned it being a tremendous help financially....well maybe that's all he wants. If he is already paying child support for other kids maybe he's tired of paying so he wants to collect from you.....
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Hi there, I am 22 weeks pregnant and going through almost the same thing. I was with my baby's father for 7 months, last month and was pregnant after 3 also. We started to not get along, stress of the pregnancy and all, and he told me last month he is not in love with me anymore, and that he still loves me and wants to be there for the baby. I love him deeply and want things to work, and like you want to have a family, but the reality is, that I can't put all the energy into someone that doesn't want it. All I can hope is that in time maybe he will mature and come around and want it, and that is my advice to you also. What you need to do now is concentrate on yourself your baby and leave him out of it. I wouldn't give your baby up for anything if I were you! There is help you can get financially and support from family and friends, that I have found is SOOO helpful!! Don't give up, and don't give up your baby! You know what will help you financially, is put his name on the birth certificate, pet_tion for full custody and get all the child support out of him that you can! In my state it's 17% of his income, and believe me, in my situation, if we are not together and doing this together by the time our daughter comes in July, I am going to do exactly that! Please, if you need anything, reply with your e mail and we can talk, our situations have a lot in common and support helps, believe me!
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