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Ok, well, this past June I was with a friend and everything was cool. The night started out fine but ended really shitty. We had a date that night and ended up going back to his place to have s_x. It being my first time, I told him that if I asked him to stop he would need to stop. He agreed. So everything started out that way but I started feeling really uncomfortable and like I had made a really bad decision. I asked him to stop, but he didn't. He gave me a look of loathing. He held me down and wouldn't let me go. I couldn't get away because he's much taller and bigger than I am and the more I tried to get away the more it hurt, and the more he hurt me. Now, I'm pregnant and don't know how I'm going to tell anyone. If I do, my family and friends will disown me. Everyone I know is really religious and thinks I'm a sinner for having strayed from God. So if I tell them this they're going to say it was my own fault. I have no idea where to go, or who to talk to. This is my only resort....please help me...
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I forgot to mention that I will turn 19 in a month and a half or so. My family will be extremely disappointed if I drop out of college. Especially if I don't give them a reason or anything. This is another reason why I haven't told anyone.
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How is your being raped your fault? You were violated and you did not stray from God . Go report this guy and just tell your family the truth. I am sure they will be more supportive if they knew the truth.
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MY GOD- HE RAPED YOU FOR HEAVENS SAKES! You really have to report this to the police. What a bastared. I'm so upset. Please don't just let him get away with this. You get him in jail and you get his a__s to court for child support. have you made a decision yet if you are going to keep this baby?
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If I tell my family that I'm pregnant because I was raped, they'll find a wayto make it my fault. It's their nature to me feel so much worse about things. It's been that way ever since I can remember. As for him being in jail, he'll deny everything. He'll pull the "she's a whore" thing. I don't know...ever since it happened I've had this feeling that no matter what I do, he'd get away with what he did. And the thought of him getting away with it is sometimes more than I can handle. And those are the times that I'm ready to turn him in. But as usual, I find some reason to talk myself out of it. A stupid one like "no, don't turn him in...if you do then everyone and their dog will know what happened to you" or the incredibly stupid ones like "it was your own fault anyway, so just leave it". I haven't made a decision yet because no matter what decision I make I'll screw everything up. There are days when I think if I keep the baby, life will be alright and will turn out ok. And then the days were thoughts like "you'll only see him if you keep the baby..." really make me lean towards another option. I've always thought that the only way abortion should even be allowed was if the girl was raped. And now that I'm actually in that kind of situation, I can't bring myself to do it. It's not the baby's fault and the baby shouldn't be punished for what he did. So I really don't know right now. Just really really scared and confused.
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I am very sorry to hear your story and more so that you can not find any support on consulation in your family...but as you are probably 16 weeks--or even more--, you need to got to a dr asap. At this stage I do not think abortion is an option anyway. I am not sure what you mean by all your friends and family being "really religious", but I would think that understanding, help and most of all forgiveness would be included. Be strong, I wish you the best.
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oops, I didn't realize this happened in June.....yeah..I think abortion would pretty much be out at this point.
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I suppose I didn't really explain my family that great. They are very religious, but very hypocritcal. I don't see how they can be mad at me for "straying from God" when they didn't find any sort of religion until after I, their last child, was born. So they went 30+ years without God and jump at the first sign that I'm "straying" and freak out on me. And they do forgive people, just as long as its not their family. If that makes sense...I don't know how to put their actions into words. It's probably one of those things where you have to see it to fully understand it.
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Untold, yes , I get your point. You must be honest with them. I know exactly how you feel. It truly is not your fault what happened. Your a young woman and you didnt do anything "disgusting " or " abnromal" in wanting to make out and whatnot. You told him to stop and HE RAPED YOU! You should not listen to idiots whom tell you "its your fault!" you didnt make him rape you...turn him in and try to get some counselling.
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Thank you for all the advice. I really, really appreciate it. I'm going to try to tell my mom tomorrow, no guarantees though. Wish me luck, I'll need it!
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well i wish you luck and would really like to know how telling your parents goes....i know how you feel though....i was raped at the age of nine by a very trusting friend of my aunties. Ever since i have been petrified to go back to her home because i know he is always there...i am 17 now so it was a long long time ago. and i am still too scared to say anything. good luck to you i hope all goes well
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hi i conceived my daughter through rape shes almost 20 mths now. never feel ashamed to admit that you been raped you done nothing wrong at all and if your family didnt understand that then they the ones who should be ashamed. my familys a totally different story so i cant compare them.... i never reported the guys that raped me cos i know they would kill me if they found me
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You havent done that at all it isnt your fault you were raped. When you say no you mean NO :( Surely they will understand when you explain how? and if they dont I'd be disgusted. I'm getting an abortion next week :(
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I thank everyone from the bottom of my heart for each and every piece of advice. I only wish I had been able to use it. Unfortunately, I miscarried on Sunday night. I really do appreciate all the advice everyone offered. Thank you for everything.
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untold... im sorry to hear your story...everything happens for a reason and you will be ok... keep ur head up sweetie...
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So sorry you had to go through so much! But I wouldn't let your miscarriage prevent you from reporting the loser. Take care and get some counseling sweetie. It's going to take some time to heal and talking will help!
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