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You could not have said it better. But the best thing would be that once you read the thread and if it's not going to be productive - just stop responding !

This entire post is unproductive. It's fine not to agree with others and not support them on certain issues but some people take it to far. As in the post about not listing the father on the birthcertificate....I agree it's not right to fraud the system but it's also not right to tell someone they should be fixed as if they are a dog. Everyone needs to be a little more mature and simply state there opinion but not degrade or intintonally hurt others feelings because you don't agree with their chooices. These are opinion and they are just like a-holes, everyone has one..........

Your post is the example. If you felt this entire post was unproductive than why did you respond? I agree with people taking it a little to far but then again stop enabling them by responding to them.

I responded to express my opinion as I thought that’s what this forum is for. Even though I feel it's unproductive I can still have an opinion about it and discuss it and respond in a mature manner. I don’t feel that I'm enabling anyone because I have no control over them and was simply expressing my view.

I apologize I took your post wrong and didn't mean to rude.

Most of your post I agree with but the other part still cracks me up.... you must not understand the welfare system. Not putting the father on the birth certificate actually makes it HARDER to collect welfare. IT IS NOT FRAUD. haha. I don't know where the heck you got the idea that someone would leave the father's name off the BC just to get welfare.. but it doesn't work like that. In order to collect welfare for you and your child you pretty much HAVE to have a father listed so the state can collect the child support to reimburse them for the money they've been giving you. That's the same misconception with people saying their taxes are going towards these people's welfare checks.. MOST OF IT IS NOT... the child support payments are. The father ends up paying the state back a lot of what the mother gets on a__sistance. Seriously, go to your state's a__sistance website and look this stuff up before you start preaching on a website about fraud. and what is the deal with people complaining about posts being unproductive? who cares? don't read them then. my goodness. Same with the posts getting deleted that people don't like.. although, I can see if they delete those rediculously mean posts that were obviously meant to get a rise out of everyone. Everyone just needs to start treating each other with respect and this board would be a LOT better (I know this post may not have been as respectful as it could've been, but I'm getting a little frustrated as well.. so I'm sorry if I offended anyone.. I did not mean to).

I agree with you "TO ALL". I have had a post removed not because it was rude, because it wasn't, but because obviously it didn't agree with the majority. And yes, in the thread was "please tell me your opinions". Most don't want opinions unless they are what they want to hear!

So you stated, you have read ALL the different posts on here? I really doubt that. I do agree that some ladies on here don't take responsibility for their actions but many do. It is unfair to say that all or even most posts are from irresponsible women who are whinin about what a man did to them. That is just not true. Some people just want to vent . True, we are ent_tled to our opinions but there is a way to express them without being rude or uncaring. It is important to hear opinions/comments good and bad but there is no need to attack anyone.

i have found that it's not always or hardly at all the person who posted the actual question to get all mad when they get a response that isn't up their alley. It's usually the other women. I'm a perfect example where the girl who started the thread was agreeing with me but everyone else was out of line as far as being rude. And I myself have been the rude one or " insensitive " . I often get the ugly side of women in the b___stfeeding forum because I am against formula but I dont take it personally. We are all hormonal and we have our prey/predator days. We all come from different backgrounds therefore we have different opinions and To All is right. Expect to get the best and worst of other's opinions and dont get mad about it. Sometimes when people's comments p__s you off it's cuz they're telling the truth. But.....there are som epeople on here I think are teenagers and they can act very immature saying things a high schooler would say. This is afterall a public forum for posting opinions. I too hate it when women get soo touchy feely when your comment doesn't fit in with the majority. Very annoying.

Well Siciotic I hope you don't plan on using any type of government a__sistance such as food stamps, wic, day care a__sistance or even state health insurance. If you do use these services I hope get caught, because what you will be doing is called FRAUD. Where in the hell do you get off not putting him on the birth certificate just because he decides that he doesn't want any of the responsibilities. I despise women like you and by reading the responses you have gotten from these other women, you are all bitter, sad, pathetic little girls who only think about themselves. I hope you all can get your selffish att_tudes in check before you bring your poor kids into the world because god only knows how they will turn out. Get a life or get fixed!!!!"

Oh no, Calling someone "bitter, sad, pathetic little girls" isnt offensive at all....

well said !!!! bravo !!!

yes there are quite a bit of air for brains, naive girls out there who will have unprotected s_x with 3 married men and get pregnant and then when life slaps them in the face they cry asking the most stupid questions like, " why dont he want me, how did this happen, why wont he leave his wife " . I could ring those girls' necks but you know what? Thats life. They are still women in a situation where they have to make life changing choices. Instead of putting yourself on a pedestal / holier than thou att_tude try to encourage these people. Give them hope. Maybe they can learn from what they brought upon themselves.

Lying to the welfare office about anything that effects what you collect is fraud. I know, I grew up on welfare and I have been on it until recently when I got a good job. That's like lying about how much you make or that you have custody of kids when you don't. It is illigal and it is fraud, but you are right about the ex paying the state back. THAT I know is true.

"To April"... where exactly in my post did I talk about lieing to the welfare office? and yes... I too know about the welfare system because my daughter and I are currently on cash a__sistence and medicaid. I've done my fair share of research on it as well. I agree that if you lie to the welfare office, then that's fraud... but not putting the father on the BC doesn't mean you're lying.. especially if you tell the welfare office that the father isn't on there when they ask (and they always do).

First to April: I think you misunderstood me, what I'm saying is if a women knows who the father is and decides not to put him on the birth certificate and tells welfare that she doesn't know who the father is only to collect a__sistance, that is fraud. If you know who the father is he should be on the birth certificate. To whoever post "This is what "TO ALL" posted" I DID NOT post that statement, even though I agree with some of her comments I would not be so harsh as to call someone I don't know "sad" and "pathetic" So please don't jump on me for someone elses post.