I Need Your Opinion Please
2 Replies
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Hello, I have a 10.5 month old dd, and my dh works 8 to 5 every day. I'm a stay at home mom at this point, I've never had a job (I'm 24) I went to college for 4 years, and got married right after, then got pregnant 6 months later. So I got offered this job with the city, it's part time, 8 to 12. I'm really excited about it, but I don't know if I should take it. The thing is that my mother lives overseas, so she can't watch my lo. But my MIL offered her services, but I don't really trust her very much, she's not the most dependable. And the main reason is that my baby daughter doesn't really tend to her, she won't really let her hold her, and cries when left alone with her. It's all because she's not very used to her, even though we live 5 minutes away, she only sees her about every other day for a few minutes. I don't want to make my daughter suffer through being with her for 4 hours every day, but I also really want this job, since I've never had one, and I neeeeed this experience. What do you think I should do? I would ask my parents, but I can't...I don't have any family buy my dh and dd here.
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Can you try leaving your dd with your mil for a shorter period of time, just to see how it goes for both of them? Maybe while you run to the grocery store or do some errands. Or, have your mil come to your house while you shower, do laundry, etc. etc. Your dd might be more comfortable with her grandma if it's at your house, and if you're there too you can see how the two are interacting. If it _still_ isn't going well, I'd consider trying to find daycare somewhere. I know, your mil will be hurt, but you have to do what's best for your kid. Working part-time like that sounds ideal, it would be a shame to lose out on a good job. Good luck!
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When you say you dont trust your mil with your daughter is it because she is an unstable woman? Or is it because your daughter has not taken to her just yet? If it is the latter, your daughter only needs time with her and she'll come to love her grandma. However, if she is unstable (as is my MIL) then DO NOT leave her with your baby. You'll spend more time worrying and won't be productive at work anyway. Does your MIL want to babysit? If so, then I say you should encourage her to come over a lot more before starting the new job. I say, try it temporarily, and if it does not work out, you can always quit the job.
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