Will The Want Pass

7 Replies
Help - October 28

I am 19 and with the perfect, married for a year now. All my friends and his are having kids or have them. I know I am young and we have time, and life is easier now without kids, But i so bad want a baby. Not bc everyone else has them, or for the love> I just have the want to take of and raise a child, I want to feel that Love. The weird thing is it wasnt a huge desire until we thought it happened on the pill 3 months ago, no period, all the symptoms and at 8 days late af showed.Ever since then ( he confused his want then also) I Keep hoping it will happen and hate the day my peroid starts......... Will this feeling pass, WIll I go back to my plan and wait???

 

Jenny - October 29

My experience is once you want one, the want never really goes away. I'm 22 and married and keep thinking about it all the time. If you want to talk, feel free to email me at jenny1606492@yahoo.com.

 

D - October 29

I think everyone has the want. And, no, I don't think it ever goes away. What matters is what you want for yourselves. Do you want to spend time together as a couple, able to do spontaneous things, without being bogged down with a HUGE responsibility? Or do you want the opposite? This is the only time in your life where you two can enjoy each other. A baby is a wonderful thing, but will bring challenges and stresses to your life. Not to mention that it will be 20 years or so before you go back to being just a couple again, once the kids move out of the house. You have so many years ahead of you to have children, why not spend some time on yourselves right now?

 

Bonnie - October 29

I agree with D (again, lol). I don't think that want ever goes away. But just remember you have a ton of time. Babies turely change your life (and can make a marriage far more stressed). Once you have children it will be a long time before going back to just being a couple again. I'm really glad my DH and I waited (though I hated the waiting at the time). We've been married 7 years prior to me getting pregnant. Good luck!

 

ignore Jane - October 31

I don't see what that has to do with married women who is exposed to people making families. The "want" is perfectly normal. It is what women are here to do!! It is a job-motherhood is one of the most natural callings you'll ever experience. If your ready-and only YOU can decide that, then take that step. If not-then you can simply look forward to all the good times that are to come!!!!

 

Kerry - November 1

I'm 25 and have been with my husband for 9 years, married for the last 2 of them! We have always wanted a family, and although the want was definitely there, I also recognised that I was too selfish to have a child until recently - I wanted to be the center of my partners world, and to have financial freedom. The time finally felt completely right last year, and now after 11 months of trying, we are having a baby. I'm still scared though !!

 

kr - November 1

Hi Help, I don't think the want will go away, but there is something you can do to make it easier: Think of all the things you want to do. Ask yourself, "What wonderful experiences could I have (driving cross country w/hubby,traveling, college,crazy fun jobs, learning a skill you've always admired) that would make me an even more competent/compa__sionate/ready mom?" You said you have a plan. What is that plan? Why wouldn't you want to finish it? Be pa__sionate and try to finish the things on your list before you TTC.

 

Kimi - November 1

i also had a "scare" but we were so excited and also about a year and a half ago i had a misscarrage and ever since then i have wanted a child so badly i think about it every day i cant help looking at baby clothes when ever i am in a store and i feel crazy at times and my boyfriend is 25 and he wants a baby too but knows we should wait as well as i do i just cant help the though running through my head every moment of every day

 

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