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it's so annoying how nobody tells you how hard and frustrating b___stfeeding is. i am having the EXACT same experience as you and i feel pathetic about it sometimes too, but it's not healthy to feel so down on yourself. i just keep trying and thinking positively, hoping that my son and i will learn together. i have gotten so frustrated to the point of crying myself! i gave him a bottle of formula on 2 occasions, and it helped him quiet down but i felt guilty. i think the bottom line is, do what your instincts tell you-that's what i'm doing. what else can you do??

You might want to double check with your pediatrician. I don't want to contradict, but I have gone with the "don't wake a sleeping baby" theory with both of my kids and have had ample supply. With my first, I religiously woke her up on schedule to feed. At the first appointment, the dr told me to let her sleep, only wake her up if she went over 5 hours. With my second, they told me to throw out the clock and she has always slept a 4-5 hour stretch, at least at night. Within a few weeks, she was up to 6. Also, my second only ate out of one b___st per feeding for the first few months. Only recently is she hungry enough to eat out of both at one feeding. And, she is a chunka-baby. I guess my point is to trust your gut. As long as the baby is growing, you're doing it right. I think some well-intentioned lactation counselors are so gung-ho about b___stfeeding, that they make too many rules that people can't possibly handle, so it backfires. I mean, how can you possibly survive weeks at a time with no more than 2 hour stretches of sleep!?!?

Well, we are in a rough patch again. Looks like Mr. Ben is having a growth spurt and I am not dealing well with it. I kind of lost it this evening- having a fit, crying, etc. It does not help that my dh is suggesting that we give Ben some formula, since one of his co-worker's wife is supplementing with formula. I have been tempted, but I am afraid it may not help and I know I will feel badly about it (even though I would not think badly of anyone who does suupplement with formula.) I think what drives me most crazy is how he fusses at my b___st, grabs my nipple with his hand and won't latch properly for five minutes, pulls off my b___st in mid-feeding, and is very resistant to being burped. I called and left a message with the lactation consultant at the hospital. Don't know if it will help, but we'll see. Sometimes I wish I could hire a wet nurse to sub for me for a few hours, but that would be wierd.

Suplementing with "artificial b___stmilk" usually doesn't cange things for the better. It is harder to digest and can cause intestinal bleeding. (That's why they have to put so much iron in it.) The biggest problem is that caring for a baby is a 24 hour exhausting job. One good rule to live by is SLEEP WHEN THE BABY SLEEPS. Resist the urge to get something done. There will be pleanty of time for those things when you get past this stage. As far as the fussing at the b___st, are you engorged? It may help to express a little first so that he doesn't get blasted by a heavy flow. This can be done by hand, or with a pump. Hang in there!

Christy I know exactly how you feel. This is not my first child but the first time I have even attempted to b___stfeed. My daughter is only a week old today and from the very beginning this has been by far one of the hardest things. I was also told to make sure to feed every 2-3 hours and to wake baby if needed. I constantly worry that she isnt getting enough to eat even though she sleeps well enough and doesnt seem to be hungry. I find myself dreading it the closer it gets to feeding time because of how difficult it is to get her to latch on properly. She also seems to "fight" with her hands while I am trying to get the right latch. Then finally she gets a good latch and drifts off to sleep after 10 min and loosens her latch a bit then tries to nurse again and the pain is horrible. To make things worse yesterday my full milk came in and now I have to deal with engorgement. Breast pumps seem to be a joke when it comes to trying to pump a little so she can get enough of the nipple to latch on to. I keep telling myself that it will get better too.

Hang in there, Wendy, it DOES get better!!!!

my son will be 6 wks old monday. i am feeling a bit disenchanted about bf again. i hate how restrictive it is from what i can eat/drink to not being able to leave him with someone more than a few hours. any encouragement would be appreciated.

Christy, have you given a bottle yet? By the time my girl was 6 weeks old, I was about ready to tear my eyeb___s out. My suggestion: Pump enough ounces for one feeding...6 to 8 should cover it. Then, leave - do whatever; go grocery shopping by yourself - it doesn't really matter what you do, just be away from your baby for an hour or 3. Go get a manicure, anything - I guarantee you will feel like a new woman!

Christy you are doing great. Having children is such a big change, especially the first one. We go from having life all about us to all about our kids once they are born. When I get down I try to do fun things like hang out with friends or family. What kinds of things can't you eat or drink? I eat and drink whatever I feel like. (no booze though, just a sleeman clear now and then)

Well, I can't eat onions or peppers or garlic it seems. I love all of those. I really want to drink a gla__s of wine, but I think that upsets his belly too. He is being a total retard about latchng on again- he won't open his mouth big enough for a good latch. He gets his hands in the way all of the time. He scratches my chest b/c I can't seem to find any good time to cut his nails. He takes forever to eat. I feel like I live on the f-cking couch. I do try to get out between feedings. but all I do is worry about the next feeding, even though I haveabout 5-6 oz stored in the freezer. We keep getting invited to stuff, but I don't want to go b/c I'll just be stuck feeding a fussy baby in some other room of the host's house by myself. To make matters worse, the weather sucks and I can't take him outside for a walk in the stroller, which would do us both some good. Doctor said to keep him away from big crowds/stores until he is six weeks b/c it is cold and flu season, so I haven't taken him out too much. I am just sick of it. I really think the people who love bf have babies that take less than 20 minutes to feed and latch on quickly and perfectly all of the time. Unfortunately, my baby is not like that and we are stuck doing this for at least a few more months b/c I won't give up even though I hate it.

Can you pump a little stash to put in the freezer or fridge, then have someone come over and watch your little man? That way you can get out of the house and get some much needed me-time. Also, you can have some saved up for the days that you want a food that you crave. Just pump and dump. There's no reason to make your life miserable. No one is happy when Mom's not happy!! I clipped my son's nails when he was asleep. I also put little hand booties on him at times. He didn't like those very much since he's a thumb sucker. Good luck and hang in there!!

sorry to b___h so much. i was feeling pretty crabby about bf this morning. after i b___hed on here, i started to feel a little better. i know i should start to pump and have my hubby feed him once a day to give me a break and to get ben used to the bottle. i have such a love-hate relationship with bf, but i know that once it is over, i will be proud of myself for doing it. i do really feel it is the best thing for him.

oh honey you are not alone! It is so frustrating i agree. but you really should pump and let someone else take the burden for a while. like jamie said, you will feel like a new woman. you will go from wanting to throw your baby out the nearest window to missing him and appreciating how sweet and adorable he is, and how much he needs you. even if you let someone give him a bottle of formula once in a while, just to give you a little freedom, it is healthier for the both of you than being so stressed out. good luck, sweetie!

Hi girls. I am so glad to hear you all feeling this way. Baby #2 is now 3 weeks old, and we have thrush. I am SO READY to quit b___stfeeding. My hubby has to keep reminding me that the first 8 weeks of b___stfeeding were rough for me with baby #1 (no thrush), and then it was a piece of cake. I ended up nursing baby #1 for a full year. It seems like if you can make it through the first 2 months, then you will just nurse until baby is ready to stop because it eventually becomes so easy. I need to constantly remind myself of that as I cry my way through each painful feeding this time around. Besides the thrush, baby #2 has a tiny mouth, short tongue, and is completely lazy about opening his little mouth wide. UGH!

thank god i am not alone! sometimes i think veteran b___stfeeders forget how tough it is in the beginning. i kept thinking if i made it through the first four weeks, it'd get better, but i guess it takes longer than that. i will do a little pumping again and try to get out some day- maybe to get my hair done. now that would make me feel bbetter.

In reply to never waking a sleeping baby. I only use that philosophy when I am sleeping. During the day I would wake him up after a 3 hour nap. This was until he started sleeping through the night. Now that he's 8 months he never naps longer than 2 hours anyway unless he's not feeling well. My doctor said not to let them sleep longer than 2-3 hours during the day and I think it was 4 hours at night until they are gaining weight consistantly. My son has a shirt that says "Don't Wake Me, I'll Wake You!".