Pregnancy Info HOME

http://www.kxan.com/global/story.asp?s=4482657 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Technology has opened a new world of options allowing you to find anything you want including p___nography. Experts say p___n can turn into a serious addiction and ruin relationships. KXAN brings you one man's story about how he became addicted to Internet p___nography and how it tore his life apart. For most, viewing Internet p___n might consist of just swapping e-mails of risque pictures among co-workers. But it's not a subject that's openly talked about among friends especially not with one's spouse. You are about to meet "Steve" -- a former addict who wanted to share his story in hopes that it might help someone else. The Internet -- for many, it opens the world of online p___nography. Twenty-five percent of search engine requests come from people looking for p___n. It adds up to more than 1.5 billion downloads a year. For most, it's just looking every now and then. For others, that's not enough. It becomes a daily addiction -- an addiction that can wreck families and tear apart marriages. "Here I lived in surburbia. Had this management job at this hi-tech company. Had this beautiful wife, but on the inside, it was like if anybody ever really knew," "Steve" said. "Steve" asked us to not show his face or use his real name, but wanted to share his story. A story of living a double life with a dark secret. "I had perpetual fantasy in p___nography," Steve said. A fantasy that started as a teenager with adult magazines, but then came the Internet. "The Internet really helped accelerate things," Steve said. He says his fantasies became an addictive, daily habit. "I was fueling myself with fantasy. More and more p___n on the Internet. It was like, 'Ok. I have this block of time,' and I would spend hours, and then later in the day, I would do it again and maybe at night at home, I would do it again," Steve said. But those fantasies began leading him down a winding road -- a road to real life problems. "It led me into an affair. I contracted herpes. My life was in shambles. I had quit this job. Going through this divorce. I was getting more and more isolated. I was quite frankly suicidal at that point. I came very very close, close as I could have gotten," Steve said. He's not alone. "I have had clients that get on the Internet using p___nography for six, up to 8 hours a day" clinical counselor Seth Houdeshell said. Houdeshell sees the problem more and more among his clients. "Addiction to Internet p___n is going to have harmful effects on a relationship because of the time involved and the amount of energy and attention that's given to that use of the computer," Houdeshell said. So how do you know if someone you love is addicted to Internet p___n? Houdeshell says look for red flags. "A decrease interest in intimacy. Decrease communication as a couple. Secrecy like a change in pa__sword. Decrease interest in other activities. Hobbies he or she used to enjoy more," Houdeshell said. After fighting a 17-year addiction to p___n, Steve started talking about his problem with a counselor and entered a 12-step s_x addiction program. "What do I think of p___n today? I think it's stupid. I think it's very stupid," Steve said. It took eight years of therapy and still Steve says he's wary of the power of p___n. "Obviously, we are never cured," Steve said. He's says he's now living a healthier, happier and more balanced life. "My recovery is between me and the guy upstairs so to speak. What is life like today? It's a far cry from those days," Steve said.

This from a guy's perspective: Porn is not OK, if you are single and young perhaps its kinda understandable that curiosity will have the better of you, I did enjoyed watching some racy magazines when I was younger. Even during the times I had a girlfriend (which were really nothing serious at all). Then I found my wife, I was still very young. But this was a woman I respected and wanted to be with for as long as possible. We later got married and the feeling persists, looking at other naked women is very disrespectuf of my wife. I will even look away when a girl shows her thong in public. Hey I'm no prude or a religious extremist. To be honest I will actually look at a thong that is showing but I will point it out to my wife and tell her that I believe that is not in good taste, not because I want to earn my wife's sympathy but because I strongly believe its true. I can't say that I haven't looked at some racy pics during the time I have been married, that would be untruthful of me, there was a time where I for some reason dropped the ball in some of my principles. It was nothing serious, no really hard p___n or anything like that. But after this "stupid" phase I came into my senses and realized that it was very disrispectful to my wife, so I stoped doing it, I actually can say I lost all interest on it. But believe me, it was getting adictive. Love your wife, enjoy her and have all the lusty fun you can have with her!

I completely agree. When you get married, you are completely dedicated to one another. You should only see each other naked and NO ONE else. Porn is just as bad as looking at another female. Heck, it IS looking at another female and I could see why my wife would get p*ssed also. Just as I wouldn't feel too good at all if she looked at other men naked. No thank you!! Its called "respect." I know the question is "Do you think its OK for a man to watch p___n." Well, I suppose if its a single guy then its OK because your not hurting anyone. But as soon as you commit yourself to someone and get married. That should be it. Just you 2 and no one else!

my boyfriend use to have a p___n tape from when he was a lot younger. we watched it together and laughed our a__ses off at how unbelieaveably lame and pathetic it was. the acting sucks, and the people are so fake! p___n is a person's personal choice, and it's no one elses place to tell them that they are doing something morally wrong. if one partner has a problem with the other looking at p___n, then they should talk it out with them. for the guys that say it's desrespectful, good for you for placing your wife so high, most women are not so lucky. but hey! if couples like it, and it gets them off...more power to ya. everybody needs a little extra excitement now and then. i know i don't look a thing like the pretty girls in the movies, but if my boyfriend had a problem with my looks then he would be with someone else better looking. don't compare yourselves with those girls, ladies. most of them probably aren't even happy.

I was roughly 16 years old when I had a day off from the summer stock theater internship that I loved dearly. I scanned a photo of my sister Carolyn and I into the computer to e mail all of my friends and family and I forgot where I sent the file... so I started searching for it. I came upon photos of my father, step mother, and my father's ex girlfriend having a threesome. I searched more and I found thousands upon thousands of p___nographic photos on the computer. My father and step mother were a little "Famous" in the area. She is a local radio personality and they were in a popular country band. So finding these photos was really difficult for me. They had always claimed to be Christians. I got nosy, though, and not understanding what the need for all this p___nography was, I searched for more answers on that screen in front of me. I eventually found a stash of child p___nography and I got physically sick. I vomited for what seemed like an eternity, even overnight. They were out of town that weekend so I didn't have to worry about them catching me. So, I freaked out. They came home and I acted like nothing was wrong. In reality, though, I went crazy. I started my eating disorders again, I was hearing voices. I was popping pills to make me high every day and I was in definite need of counseling. So I visited my father's counselor (huge mistake by the way...) and I talked to him about it all. He suggested i confront them both. So I did. They blamed me and gave me the silent treatment. So I moved out. Then on my 17th birthday my father's home was raided. I was subpoenaed to testify against him, so was my sister. To make an extremely long story short (I am leaving a ton of information out), my father is now in prison and will be out soon. I now have a son and I want him to stay away from me. I have many reasons to believe that I should not have been allowed around him after they raided his house. He still came around and if I had the money to hire a lawyer, I would sue because he violated me every time he came around and even just looked at me or hugged me. Those photos are burned in my mind and I have nightmares. Those children were violated when those photos were taken and are violated repeatedly every time someone else looks at them. It sickens me, but it sickens me even more now that I have a son. There were signs all along that he was getting into this. The way he would hit on my friends all the time. The way he would take photos of them every time they came over and I could never find the photos anywhere but in his bedroom... He would spend countless hours on the computer and I caught him masturbating a few times. But I was too young to know any better. I am now almost 21 and I feel 100+ years old because of everything I've been through. He has put me through a ton my whole life and I feel that if I could just share my story and tell people what p___n can do to a person, maybe, just maybe I might have some closure. Pornography is evil and I don't understand the obsession. Maybe it's because I'm a woman and women have s_x with their hearts not with their *AHEM* Yes, you get the point. I just don't understand what the pleasure in looking at people is... But that's just me.

Sure, I think its fine. As long as he does it when his wife is not around. Women usually have low self esteem when pregnant and feel bad when they see super fit women.

Lori: I'm sorry you had to go through all that. Back to the topic, I'm not saying that couples should stay away from p___n, if both of them are OK with it and it gets them off then go ahead and have a ball (pun intended LOL!). My point is that this is something you shouldn't be doing behind the back of your spouse, and if he/she is not OK with it then don't do it. I value and respect my marriage and my wife and personally I think that watching p___n is a form of cheating so personally I'm not OK with it. But thats just my humble opinion, everybody else is ent_tled to their opinion which I respect.

the women in p___n are not super-fit. they have fake b___bs and get the fat sucked out of them by high priced cosmetic surgeons or starve themselves. i'd rather be a pregnant chick with curves then a skinny s___t who has s_x with numerous men in front of a camera. anyone can look like a b__w up doll for the right price, but it takes a real man to see how s_xy us real women truly are. we are the ones who get stretch marks and have our babies instead of aborting because we dont want to "lose our figures." besides, who do you know would be proud to say "my mom has slept with everyone and their brother and it's all on tape." now THATS something to be proud of.......

Hah... so, its OK to do things behind your spouses back?? Gosh, what a marriage you must have!!! Also... this isn't just for pregnant woman... you don't have to be pregnant to dislike your husband watching p___n. Dah!!

its not about the way one looks... its about looking at someone other than your loved one. If they are OK with it, then OK.. but, if not. respect that and STOP!!!

absolutely!!! my DH has got heaps of p___n stashed away that even I like to watch sometimes :o) I think it's normal and healthy and as I tell him - he can get his appet_te anywhere but can only eat at home! I feel bad for him right now because it's just too d__n uncomfortable for us to enjoy s_x (I'm 32 weeks) and I understand that he has needs just llike most people

Right bec ... I used to think the same thing ... and then my husband lost control of that "appet_te" & started "snacking" behind my back with the office whore. Never say “Well, that won’t ever happen to me!” And before anyone cares to blame me for his cheating … my husband will be the first to tell you that we were “perfect” and then he let his s_xual addiction get out of control. And it all stared in his teen years … with a little p___n.

My wife is not pregnant but I want to give my opinion on this. My wife dresses to be look at, she wears jeans that barely cover her pubic hair, heir b___t crack shows almost all the time, her thong is almost always visible, if she is wearing a skirt its almost always seethrough enough that anyone needs no imagination whatsoever, her b___st are almost spilling out of her tops, clevage is almost always present. I told her many times that I think she should dress with a bit more modesty. considering she is 36 years old. She says that she sees absolutely nothing wrong with the way she dresses and if guys have a good peek she doesn't care. So she feels ok about showing as much of "the goods" as possible to everybody but she gets mad when I look at p___n. Doesn't makes sense to me.

Tell her you will stop looking at p___n as soon as she starts dressing her age. Why would it be ok for other men to look at her, but you not to look at other women?

"Tell her you will stop looking at p___n as soon as she starts dressing her age. Why would it be ok for other men to look at her, but you not to look at other women?". Exactly my point!

There is a difference if OTHER people are looking at either one of you.. than YOU looking at other people. So what if people look at you or your wife. Thats their problem. Yet, you or your wife looking at other people is a different issue. Can't compare~!!! That wasn't a good point.