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What I have seen her teach on the show is to sit in your child's room at bedtime where the child can see you but you don't look at them or make eye contact. There is no talking other than when you put the child to bed (crib or bed) you say time for bed, hugs and kisses, mommy and daddy love (or whatever...). Then you sit and see what happens. If the childs gets up, get's out of crib or bed, you go over and say again, time for bed, lay them back down and sit again. You repeat this three times. After the third time, you don't say anything.. just put them back down and then sit down again and wait. You progessively over weeks/months move yourself further away from crib/bed until eventually you are out of the room and they are going to sleep alone. We did this with our son when he was 2 and 1/2 and it worked great. We used to have to lay down with him for 1-2 hours and then again in the middle of the night. Now he may be awake for an hour in his bed, but we aren't held prisoner with him. It was such a blessing for us. We started this when we got pregnant with our second and thank goodness we did. Good Luck.

I don't know about that, but this is what I did. My son was 2 years old when I did this. Lay down in the bed with him and match your breathing to his. Slowly slow down your breathing so that he can follow you to a more relaxed breathing. He will fall asleep within 15 min. of slowing down the breathing. When he is asleep gently roll away. Works like a charm, and teaches how to fall asleep.

I would caution against Deena's method as the child is not learning to fall asleep alone. It is soooo important for children to learn to fall asleep alone. If you are always there as a crutch they won't learn how to fall alseep without you there. Just my opinion....

I did something similar to what Deena describes. It worked very well my daughter isn't afraid of being abandoned. She now kisses us goodnight in the livingroom and takes herself off to bed. She's 5 now and I'm usually nursing her sister who is 3 months. I go in and tuck her in when I'm done nursing. She is usually already asleep.

Wow, I have never heard of this, but I guess it works.

I think I'm going to try the breathing one. I really can't handle the crying. It just rips my heart out! Is there anything else I need to know about it? It just sounds gentler. Deena and Tara how long did it take before they could do it on their own?

I did that Deena thing too. I didn't read about it, I just seemed like a good idea. It works with younger babies too. I used it off and on with my newborn.

WOW! I did the breathing thing with my girl when she was a newborn - she's been sleeping through the night since she was 3 weeks old...I didn't know it was a common method...that's cool!

I did the breathing thing with my 2 year old. It was very relaxing for me as well. It's a good way to unwind after a busy day. My daughter took well to it and after about 6 weeks I only had to lay down with her for 10 min. It took about 10 weeks for her to be comfortable enough to do it on her own. Try it, you'll be supprized at how easy it is. And there's no crying involved at all. Nothing stressfull or uncomfortable. LOVING MAGIC!

Sounds like teaching by example. No reason why it shouldn't work well. Example is supposed to be the best way to teach. No reason why we can't teach our kids how to relax. It's a very valuable lesson. Yoga teaches breathing as a way to relax. Maybe we would all sleep better using this breathing technique. Thanks for sharing it!

I have also used my eyes. While looking at baby (when she is sleepy already, but fussy), get her locked into my eyes, then let mine get droopier and droopier until they close. Hers usually close also and she goes to sleep. This is nice when we're out and we can't do our normal sleeping routine (nursing, then putting her down to sleep in her ba__sinet).

Thanks for sharing this info on alterintives to crying it out. I really didn't want to do it. This makes so much sense and seems pretty natural and easy. I'm difinately going to use it. I really think the eye closing will come in handy when we're away from home. Thanks again, this is a great site.