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i'm not home birthing but i wanted to ask if you can think of any ways to make a hospital birth more like home. our birth center is great, very large nice rooms that are alot like a home setting. i want to deliver with as little poking and prodding as possible. where should i put my foot down? this is baby # 3, so i know the ropes. :o)

I would love to... but with some complications, I can't. Also, some places its becoming harder and harder to have home births because of skyrocketing insurance / malpractice premiums.

to Maleficent- Have you made a birth plan?? if you have add thata you want as little poking and prodding as possible. if you havent then just tell the midwife i want as little poking and prodding as possible. Good luck.

i'm 17 weeks, so no definate birth plan has been drawn up. but i do know the basics of what i want. i'm not a fan of being "checked" every hour. i think i'm capable of knowing when i'm ready to push, and if they want to check just before then thats fine, but i don't want hourly cervical up dates. if an IV is unavoidable i want it OUT within hours of delivery. i hate having to drag that thing with me to the bathroom, and it really gets in the way. i swear, i'll take it out myself if i have to. (the hospital is going to LOVE me) i don't want baby's cord to be clamped or cut untill it stops pulsing. i don't want to be starved during labor. my doctor is a bit of a dofus. honestly, if i had a speculum and a heart doppler i think i could do my check ups myself. lol. i'm counting on competent nurses, so long as the doc stays out of my way i'll be fine. if there is an emegency the guy isn't even allowed to do c-sections anyways.

Mal where'd you find this guy? Your right the nurses do most of the work.

Maleficent, you sound like me by my third! There is nothing worse than arguing with every idiot that comes into your room while you're in labor. And I swear, drs say yes to the birth plan and then just do what they want unless you're all over them to do what they said they'd do. I was induced with the last one because she was big. I knew it would be a hell of a lot easier to deliver upright and squatting but when it was time, there I was on my back. With this big fat baby. It took me an hour to push her out! And then they argued about waiting for the cord to stop pulsing, etc. I'm having the next one at home by myself with no one around to p__s me off.

to michelle, do you have msn messenger?? are you pregnant right now?? good luck

he's the only guy in town that takes our insurance. he's a family practicioner, not even an obgyn. he's very old fashioned, and thinks alot of the "wives tales" are gospel truth. i'm just happy that this is baby #3 and i have a good idea what i'm doing. i swear, my husband and i are going to be slapping hands in that delivery room if we have to. lol. thank god the nurses there are wonderful.

I am from the Netherlands and homebirthing is a normal thing overhere. It is actually standard procedure to give birth at home. I had my kids in the US and will have to get used to the way things are done here. But I have to say that the no eating part in the US is strange. Thats different as well as staying in bed. I was not allowed to get out of bed with both my deliveries.

I am 21 weeks pregnant and am planning a home birth in the U.K. I thought I would write something and would be glad of an exchange. I am 41 years of age, and so feel like I have overcome several hurdles already in being seen as 'high risk'. I had read Sheila Kitzinger when I was younger and so she was the first person I turned to (in book form), when I found out I was pregnant. I was (and am) in good health and a non-smoker. I have so far survived my pregnancy with no internal examinations whatsoever, (I did not feel ill and have not been offered them by my community midwives). I have had only one ultrasound scan (last week) and the baby is well. I declined earlier offers of scans, as from my reading I felt tha t often things are said about which you can do nothing anyway, and I had gone through the list of available tests (like amnioncentesis) and decided they would be harmful. Basically , Kitzinger's philosophy is to guard against interventions as they generally lead to further interventions which may be damaging. I am a Rhesus negative bloodgroup and have been offered anti-D, which I feel I will decline likewise, as I am not convinced that it will do no harm rather than good. This is after careful reading I might add, and by listening to what I feel I know about my own body. So, as to home birth preparations. I feel like I am coming to the end of a huge list of reading and preparations in my end about homebirth. I joined the National Childbirth Trust with my husband, have got hold of some self-hypnosis CDs which I have listened to already, and plan to use from week 36. As far as pain is concerned, people say that childbirth is 'as painful as it gets'. However, I have (with my 41 years experienced pain (and fear) before - for example I have had really painful periods always, and therefore feel I have learned to deal with a certain amount. Pschologically, pain is supposed to increase when you are afraid, and so I have been focussing, the last few months on creating a home environment where all the chores will be taken care of (freezer) - and have good working systems in place for these so I don't need to worry about them. I am concerned about what people say about childbirth and pain, as I feel that much of it is coloured by negative experiences. My birth companions will include my husband, the midwife and my two cats. My youngest cat particularly, has a habit of coming and sitting and purring on my bump whenever I am feeling tired or panicked, and having read how cats give birth, I feel that she is a good example of what might be possible. Just to say something which to some might seem completely outrageous - I read for the first time the other day that pain and childbirth are not necessarily connected. Is it a (Western) cultural thing that childbirth is connected with all sorts of negative feelings for so many women? Look forward to hearing from you.

for me pain has always been part of the birthing process. but i've survived it twice already and am actually looking forward to doing it again when this baby comes. you sound very informed and mentaly prepared, your state of mind will definatly help, as well as being surrounded by supportive and caring people (and cats). i think it's easy to get scared and freaked out by the idea of delivering a baby, but i've found it to be an amazing, empowering experiance. good luck to you!

Natural Highness, you sound so very well prepared. I wish you the best. I don't think pain and childbirth are necessarily connected but rather the result of our cultural expectations. I used to mediate and I still try to get my 20 mins in every day. What I do when in labor is try to get to a state similar to that. I have been hampered/distracted my having other people around during my births, esp. drs. and nurses. I'm not pregnant right now. We are going to try for #6 this summer (my #6, dh's #3). This time I want to birth at home with no one bothering me. I agree with Maleficent that birth is an amazing, empowering experience.

I so want a homebirth...everyone thinks I'm crazy...family, friends. I know of no one who has had a home birth and finding a midwife has been quite a task.

I am on baby #1 and want to have it in the hospital, but also want it to be as natural as possible. I am planning on having no pain medication because I think that my body knows best and if I can't tell what my body is thinking, then I may run into problems. I am in the U.S. and I can honestly tell you that teh childbirth=pain thing IS very prominent here. Most people here tell you you're crazy for wanting to have a natural childbirth & you must be trying to prove something. Then they get offended and want to argue when you say that epidurals DO affect the baby, they DO cross the placenta and they DO increase the likelyhood that you may need further medical intervention to be able to give birth. When people tell me I'm nuts or they say something like "that's what you say now" that only makes me more set on doing it naturally.

i was planning to have a home birth but im not sure weather i will be now.. im 35 weeks and u have 2 be 37 before u can have a home birth and i have been having really bad tightnings and cramps for the past 3 days.. hopefully he can hold out for a couple more weeks!