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I am 32 yrs. old and delivered my second son 1 month ago today. However, I am soooo sad. Even though I was very miserable at the end of my pregnancy, I severely miss being pregnant. I don't know if it's a normal thing or if it's because I know I will never be pregnant again. When I think back on moments of my pregnancy like the baby kicking or having the hiccups, remembering my baby showers or my doctor visits or even replaying the day of my delivery over and over in my head... tears just overcome me. I had hoped the feeling would pass (especially when I'm feeding my newborn at 3 am and fighting complete sleep deprivation) but I can't seem to prevail. My relationship with my husband seems to be falling apart day by day but, it's all been since my little one has arrived. He has become more strict and hateful with our 4 yr old and seems to have little tolerance for the baby when he's crying. It makes me sooo sad when I wish things were back like they were before my baby arrived even though I love my little one to pieces! I just want to know "are my feelings justified" or are my hormones turning me into a postpartum fanatic?? If this is post partum how will I know and will it go away in a few weeks? Should I ask my doctor for medication? Those depression meds really scare me. Does anyone have any answers? Am I the only one who misses being pregnant and cries about it??? Help??!!
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i personally didnt miss being pregnant with either of my boys. i was relieved to give birth and never look back. when i was in the hospital with my first son (21months) the girl who shared the semi private room with me had just had her 3rd child. she was the same age as me (21) but she ALWAYS talked about how much she missed feeling her baby inside of her. her husband was kind of a grouch too. i think you MIGHT be right about knowing you wont be having more kids thing because she was on her 3rd and had her tubes tied. so maybe thats it? i really dont know. i had my tubes tied and have only had very mild regret that i wont have more babies. i cant really afford any more! :) it sounds normal to me. i think its a combination of hormones, sleep deprivation, having a crabby husband (who is also probably sleep deprived), and having your hands full with two boys! THAT i am sure of! If you are concerned that you are having postpartum depression you SHOULD talk to your doctor. but i think maybe you're just weepy. with my first son, i was incredibly emotionaly for months. i would cry at the drop of a hat and for no real reason. but it went away. most people with postpartum depression (the kind that you REALLY have to worry about) are people with family history of mental illness or depression or previous depression issues in earlier pregnancies. if you had no problems with your other son and your mom has never had depression or mental illness then you are probably fine. that said, if you are still concerned, talk to your doctor about an anti anxiety pill called buspar. my mother takes it and its non addictive and really isnt an anti depressant. im going crazy enough with my two boys that im thinking about taking it. i took it once before when i was having a rough time (long personal story) because i couldnt work without bursting into tears for no reason. it helped very much. i describe the help it gave me as 'a breath of fresh air' it didnt make me FEEL like a different person at all. it just made me feel like i had the clarity to stand back, examine my situation quickly and sigh and move on without feeling overwhelmed like i had been. email me if you have any other questions or just want to talk. im sure you'll be ok. good luck! sprimeleon@hotmail.com
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