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i feel very uncomfortable with myself also. no clothes fit and i feel fat

Nicole, congratulation on your little girl. I wish i could give you advice on pp depression but I myself am not due for a few months and this is my first, but i have had times in my life where i have been depressed and feel alone and the worst thing is not having someone to talk to or someone who understands. Your husband should be there for you and i find it amazing that you have a clean house and dinner ready, i can't even do that now so i don't see how it's going to get done when our little girl arrives. Give yourself some credit, it sounds like you are doing a great job i think a lot of men don't understand how hard it can be to take care of an infant. If the roles were reversed he would probably be crying too. I'm guessing you have tried to sit down and tell him how you feel and he is just not getting it b/c in his mind he's the one who works all day and you're the one who is at home. Is there any family or friends who can come over and give you a little break? Maybe you could look into a part-time nanny or a babysitter to come and help you out a little. And as far as the clothes not fitting and feeling fat, I'm sure that is normal for most women who have recently given birth. What's that saying, nine months up and nine months down?

NICOLE--It sounds like your husband doesn't understand what it takes to take care of the baby all day. I had my first baby on March 27th and I had the baby blues pretty bad for the first 2 weeks. Things are better now but I still have my moments. You should contact your ob gyn so he/she can evaluate you for pp depression. You should try and sit down with your husband when he is not tired (maybe on the weekend) and talk to him. Be sure to avoid phrases that sound accusatory. Do you get out of the house everyday? Go on walks, go to the mall and shop-- Maybe your husband can spend a whole night and day with the baby by himself and then he will understand. If you are b___stfeeding you could pump and give him some bottles--or just leave the house and come back every couple of hours for feedings. That will teach him that a mother's job is not easy. It can take up to 8 months to get your pre-pregnancy body back...I feel fat as well--I had to buy new clothes the other day. It's kind of depressing but just remember you will shed the weight if you get a little exercise, eat fruits and vegetables, etc. Hang in there!

i have told hime how i felt, but it does not seem to sink in. now that the weather is nice, i have been taking walks with little one. however, dh gets mad that i compain that i need time alone. he says his mother stayed home with 3 kids, and did not complain, i should. i guess i am more needy than she is.

How does he know she didn't complain or that she didn't feel the same way as you do? My guess is that there were times when she felt the exact same way but he didn't see it as a child. Maybe it is time to see a thearapist. They can determine if you are suffering from pp depression and even if you are not i still think it would be helpful to talk to someone, to me it sounds like the bigger problem here is that you and your husband are not on the same page. I would suggest marriage councling but your dh seems like the type that wouldn't do and then criticize you for even bringing it up.

ha! he should be so lucky! i stay home and don't do any house work...he works full time and is in school and he can make his own dinner, our boy is 4months and doesn't even have colic, although is beginning to teeth. i demand a baby break at night even if he has to go to an aa meeting or do schoolwork, we aren't very financially stable and i work very part time but when all you do is baby stuff all day you NEED a break. if you can cook and clean...well i'll appreciate you if he won't ! good luck i get frustated too probably why i won't help pa__sive aggressive i guess

i have four children, and four postpartum stories to go along with them. with the feelings you are expressing it sounds like existing selfishness on your husbands part. it is apparent now because you need him most right now. i hope you are able to get counciling so he can have the oppurtunity to realize you and his baby girl both could really use his help. keep us posted. i am proud of you for all of your dedication to your family!

Nicole are you still there?. No one has posted on this thread for a few days so I'm not sure. But I feel the same as you. I'm ashamed to admit it but I do. I had a horrible birth experience thru c/s as well. And I think my ds has colic as well, he cries all the time. I could really use someone who may understand to talk to, so I hope you come back. I'll keep checking in.

nanders- I experienced PPD and anxiety (am still being treated in fact). I just had a baby girl last fall. Can I help you? Please reach out if you need it.

Part of it sounds like PPD, but part of it sounds like your husband not being understanding. You need to let him know that just because you stay at home all day does not mean that you aren't working just as hard as he is. Being a full time mommy is a lot harder than going to work for the day and then being able to come home and relax afterwards. He may be running a business, but guess what? So are you! You are running a household and raising a child and there is NOTHING that can compare to that. Your job is never done. Tell him that. I am having problems with ppd too, and I feel the same way. Totally underappreciated. My bf complains when I ask him to help me with something which makes me even more depressed. I think we all need to just be open with our siginificant others about everything and tell them that they need to understand what we are going through.