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This is your life, regardless of who you chose to share it with. No one has the right to control your body or your decisions except you. Your BF sounds as if he is self centered and trying to be controlling.. weigh your options, stay with a jerk who runs your life or share your life with a beautiful baby, who will grow into a wonderful companion throughout life? Good luck

Susi, sounds like you and the bf have totally different views and wants, which is ok. If you wish to keep your baby, which I hope you do, then you should move on. Since your bf doesn't want a child, I wouldn't even try to force the issue on him, and I don't think it fair to demand anything from him since he is clear about not wanting it. Just move on darling, and enjoy your baby :) I'm sure things will work out, even though it might seem scary to go it alone at first. People grow apart and change.. sounds like that is what happened here. Best wishes :)

A friend of my mothers was in the same situation and had a wonderful son and never regreted it. He is confident and smart and has always known he was loved and wanted. It depends on your resources and confidence. She felt very clear about what she wanted and her ability to make it work. And -- the father never changed his mind, so don't a__sume he will.

Of course you just do it on your own. Tell him to get stuffed.

It takes two to raise a child properly, disregarding the earlier examples. It's your body and your choice. Having the child is the easy part. Providing and raising is the hard part. Be sure to be economically capable as well as emotionally ready to possibly do it on your own ( tha included the lack of without Child Support). Personally, I think it is a disservice to the child to provide an emotionally deficient situation, ie love from two parents. It's do-able to raise great examples, previous postings, but not the rule. Also at your age there may be significant health risks to the growing fetus. At your age there is a significantly higher risk of Down-Syndrome and other birth-defects. Look into adopting a child from a mother who tried doing it on her own and wasn't able to. (I feel sorry for the child who's mom thought she was up to the task and wasn't.)

It is your choice and your body. This decision need to be your decision. Sit down and think about what is right for you. Do you want a child at 38? Can I support this child? This is a very hard decision. Good Luck!!!

Susi just wondered how you are doing and are you ok?

The decision of whether to have children or not to have children is something that many couples do not see eye to eye on. I think at this point you really need to make a decision for yourself - you have been given a very wonderful opportunity - the opportunity to become a mother. Which is a very important job. If you BF does not want to participate in this than that is his decision. Aborting a child is something that is very serious and something that will forever change you. This little baby deserves a chance in life and you deserve to be happy - Make your own decision. Good luck.

Another question I would be asking myself at this point is what sort of (quality) person my BF really is, and if trying to keep a relationship going with him is worth the decision of terminating my baby. No man is worth such a price to me, but that's just me. Besides, it's not as hard as some people make it out to be to raise a child on your own.. I've done it, and love, faith, and determination carrys you through almost anything. A child is better off with one happy healthy parent than being raised by two miserable ones.

Tell the ignorant twit to pound sand.

Why not! If you want this baby, have it! Your bf may not be around. The baby will be with you for life. You said that you are 38. Do you have other children? This may be you last chance for a child. Good Luck!

As a mother, I can honestly say you won't regret having your child. You may however regret making a decision to keep the BF and not the child.

Who says just because you do it alone you don't get to have child support. Just because he does not want the child or to participate in it's life does not mean he is not obligated in any ways. He is obligated by law to financially help support this child with child support. I know here in Tx. they will draft it out of the father's pay check, and some have even gone to jail for avoiding their payments. Just make sure you go through the court systems, and if you cannot afford an attorney, they do have some from the state that do it for free. He helped make this child, wether it was unintended or not, for he did not use a condom did he. It is not your fault that the IUD failed, and besides, no birth control is ever 100% effective. He is old enough to know that if he is going to go to bed with you, then he is responsible if something happens. It's not just all on you, unless you want his paternal rights taken away.

Susi, I'm 41 and in the exact same boat BF doesn't want the baby he's 47 and wants me to abort. I'm 12 weeks along and could never kill my baby. I have 2 other children and I will raise this baby by myself in a loving, caring home and the big loser bf will pay child support you can do it on your own there are many community programs that will help you. Good luck!

That's a tough choice that only you can make. I just found out i'm pregnant and the father is not in my life, so I am choosing to have it on my own. It's a tough choice, but the key is to do what YOU want. Don't make a choice to please him as he may not always be in your life.

This happened to me last year and I did abort. I have regretted the decision terribly. I now find myself desperate to have a child and I am prepared to do it on my own if I have to. My partner still is not wanting to conceive yet because of finances. Howevr I feel that my time is running out. I can only speak for myself but my decision last year has put me through so much pain and heartache. My only advice is do what you fell is right as it is you body and your soul. Good luck :-)