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Well I am 3 months pregnant ( I'm 21 ) and my sister is 6 months pregnant ( shes the youngest and is 17 ) this is my issue...
My parents bought a new house which is a 4 bedroom..they bought it before I found out I was pregnant..I said the room that my mom picked out for me was fine because it seemed alright and was away from every one else ( I'm moving back home because I need time to destress). And my sister was going to have her own room and the baby was going to have her own room. First I was a little ticked that my sisters room was bigger than mine but I got over it. Well I found out I was pregnant at 1 month and then after 2 months I told my mom..she was fine with it and I was under the impression that my sister and my babies were going to share the room...well aparently not. I was on the phone with my mom today when all of a suden she said " I hope the baby's crib will fit in your room" ( my room is pretty tiny and doesn't even have a closet ). And I was thinking wtf...so I said " uh...wasn't our babies going to share that big room? ( oh yea my sister's baby room is bigger than my room ) and my mom was like " the room is too far away from your room..how would you hear the baby cry, even if you have a monitor then you wouldnt know the difference between your sisters baby or yours". well by now I'm a little ticked off because I just don't think its fair. Then I suggested that my sister share her room with the baby and then keep that one room as a spare until the babies are big enough to have their own rooms to share. Well that totaly p___sed off my mom because she thought I was accusing her of picking favorites then put the guilt trip on me saying shes so stressed out and I'm making her misrible and now shes not excited to move into the new house and yada yada...I wasn't trying to p___s her off I was just stating a point cause it is totaly unfair. Also my parents are making me pay rent and not my sister....she wont even pitch in for food. I also just found out a year ago that my father isnt my biological father which he is to my sister but hes been there since I was 9 months old...I think my sister knows because she always says shit like well you dont have to worry about dads side of the family for genes....also I know she will get a kick out of this whole situation with her having a nice big room and me having this tiny room...she will yell at me and treat me like shit...she is pretty controlling and if things don't go her way she snaps....
I just need advice on this whole thing...just your thoughts from mothers point of views.
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Well, your mom is kind right. You wouldnt want to be far away from your baby at night and with the monitor you wouldnt be able to tell whose baby is crying. I mean you are a adult and your sister is not (as far as the paying rent goes)
I understand you feel but there's probably not much you can do about it. I do think if your sister is working she should start paying your parents something. Is there anywhere else you can stay that may be less stressful for you?
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I understand about the sharing the room..I'm not mad about that, I am mad that my sister doesn't have too and she will shove it in my face, she already acts like she owns the whole house and bosses everyone around. And there should not be a difference between me being an adult and her still being a minor because we are both facing a difficult situation and she should not be babied and she needs to face the real world.
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Well, you are right, she is making an adult decision by having a baby so she should act more like an adult. Are you trying to save up money to get your own place? It doesnt sound like your sister is going to make is very easy for you at home!
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yes, I am going to save up money def. My friend even suggested that I could find a place with her, she said she wouldn't mind the baby since shes grown up with them pretty much all her life and baby sitting. My sister has been like this since we were extreamly young because she knew she was the favorite of my grandma since I am not my fathers biological child. Right now I am living on my own but moving back in so I can save up some more money and it would just help me out, my parents actualy suggested that I move back home. ( this was before I found out i was pregnant ) but the reason my sisters baby gets its own room even though its like way bigger than mine is because they bought the house before they found out i was pregnant and they are sticking with the plan of my sister's baby having its own room. I also know that when it is time for the children to share a room together my sister will have a hissy fit and say she does not want them sharing a room. * sigh * i know her like no other. she is readable and i know what she will be like.
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Why don't you just take up your friends offer and get an apartment to share? You could get a three bedroom and it would be much better. Once the baby comes you are going to wish you had a place of your own anyway. It sounds like a really bad idea to be living at home.
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Yea but its a money thing, I want to save up as much as I can so I can live comfortbly with out having to worry if I have enough for my child, myself and my bills.
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What if you take the babies room with your new baby and your sister's babe gets your room? Honestly- if it were me I would NOT want to have my baby share a room with another baby right away....1st by 3 mo your sister's babe will be sleeping better at night and then a new baby is going to come in and mess with that sleep pattern, and what if your baby is a great sleeper and your sisters baby isn't...then your baby will be sleeping (or trying to sleep) but waking up your baby. If I were in your situation I would want the babe with me (which I think you will find once the baby is born) but with ALL of that being said...that doesn't take away from the fact that I would be hurt to if there were favorites being chosen or if my sister was acting that way. I missed it but is your baby's father involved at all?
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I was just saying that her baby should share her room too instead of having its own room when my room is so mall and hers is bigger than mine. and no the father is not involved...when i told him he just said one thing to me then that was the last I heard from him...almost 3 months ago. So ive been hurt by that too.
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Bilmes- what a bummer- this is supposed to be such a joyous happy time for you!!! Well hopefully something will work out here. I totally see what you are saying by wanting to have your sister share the room with the babe if she is getting the bigger room. I think you are doing the best by saving up and moving out. It won't be as much of an adjustment for you if you have to pay rent already- at least that money will be allocated to a "rent" type of payment already so you won't have a huge adjustment when you move out. Good luck- hang in there. It will work out but right now isn't the time you need to be stressing about it...ugh!
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