Just Venting But Would Like Some Support
1 Replies
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I been on and off with a very shady person. I made up my mind though. I'm leaving him nonetheless. At one time, he did love me...but the truth is at this point he hates me and wants to make me miserable. He disappoints me every other day when I do speak to him. He never keeps his word. He doesn't make me feel good or happy. He is manipulative and conniving. Mind you, this is just a few of the reasons as to why I'm settled on leaving him. I don't want him to be a part of my life anymore. And surely I don't want him to be a part of this child's life. He'll just use the child as an excuse to continue to haunt, irritate, annoy, harass, and simply keep me unhappy. I know him all too well. People think that children can change people, but that is all but a myth. I know the truth. I know the reality. Honestly, I'm just scared because I know it's going to be hard to announce this news to my family and friends. But I'm more scared of how I am going to support this child financially. Having him around would have make it easier since he is far beyond well off, but I cannot and will not sacrifice the happiness of this child nor my own. Ladies, tell me how do you do it...being single and pregnant...being single and raising your children? :-(
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Hi Ceno...
Well, you seem to realize you're better off without the guy, and you are! Trying to stay in an unhealthy relationship because of your little one is a bad idea, and I'm glad to see you say you aren't staying with him.
Best pieces of advice I can give you is: *Don't be afraid to ask for help, from family, friends, maybe a church group if you're so inclined.
*No one expects you to be super-mom. Don't expect perfection from yourself and you'll be much more content with yourself and baby.
*Get child-support! In some states, you can get support without Dad getting much as far as visitation goes. If he proves to be detrimental to your or the child's well being, he may get nothing other than supervised visits, but you'll get the financial resources you need.
I am the single parent of a 14 year old, and I am pregnant again. (My middle child lives with my ex-husband in another state) I ask for help when I need it, I don't go insane over a cluttered house (clean, but not tidy all the time) and when it's hardest, I count my blessings. I can drag myself down in the dumps pretty fast some days, so trying to remember the good things I do have in life, and knowing that some folks are much(!) worse off, helps.
You'll be okay! It might be tough to go it alone, but take it one day at a time. Don't worry about yesterday, and worry about tomorrow when it gets here.
Best Wishes,
Zim
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