My Son

14 Replies
SO ANGRY AND PREGNANT - January 4

Hello all I'm so hurt I have a 6yr old son whom I'm no longer with his father any longer now I'm engaged to another man who doesn't speak to my son just seems fustrated all the time by my son just by faces that he makes the only reason he doesn't like my son is because of his father I'm afraid when I have this baby his first and only baby he will definately treat my son worse than what it is he acts as if my son isn't there and he is always saying little things like your son. I think I'm going to leave him becasue I don't want my son to be around someone like that he is to little to understand and he thinks the world of my fiance I just don't know what else to do. Anyone out there to give advice I tell my mom everything but she is going to think I should stick it out because I have one already with one guy and now 2.

 

momm4 - January 4

If you're worried enough about the situation to really be considering ending the relationship, then the problem is obviosly serious. It is almost positive that the situation won't get better on it's own, so you should really consider discussing it with him. Let him know you're upset and worried about what's best for your son. If this guy is serious about a marraige with you and a family with your children, he will try to fix the situation.

 

KJ - January 4

Why would you want to be with a man who treats your son like garbage? Why would you want to marry a man who is so immature and self centered that he doesn't like your son because of his father? How do you know that? Have you asked him why he doesn't like your son? I suggest you go into therapy to find out why you're so Co-Dependant and why you would allow yourself to even think about marring a man who you claim doesn't like your son. You need to grow up and start putting your son first instead of your own selffish needs.

 

anita - January 4

you need to have a serious talk w/ your fiance about his att_tude. that kind of preferential treatment will be extremely emotionaly damaging to your 6yr old. if your fiance doesn't change his ways, your son will definately suffer and he may even develop hostility toward the new child. your fiance is an adult and he can control his emotions much better than a child. if he can't change, then you should definately leave him...raising children in an enviorment would be unfair to BOTH the children. maybe try counseling. whatever you do, PLEASE don't allow him to continue treating your son this way. it's just wrong.

 

krc - January 4

why would you get engaged to a man who clearly disrespects you by treating your son that way. I can already picture him favoring his own child and pushing away your son. That will lead to serious emotional problems in your son. Especially if you let it happen. There could be a rivalry between your son and your fiance as he gets older, he could have resentment towards the new child( or not)..move out at an early age, get into trouble for the attention he's lacking at home. it goes on and on. I've known personally quite a few people who went down that path when a step parent steps in and ignores them or treats them with no love...putting down their other parent. The outcome is never good..it affects the whole family and could damage your relationship to your son. I would SERIOUSLY consider what choices your making. But if you've already gone this far knowing what you know... you may be a woman who is weak and easily pushed over by a man. I mean that in no disrespect but what is more important to you. You and your childrens emotional well being or letting your fiance run the show?

 

Hi - January 4

Your child comes first!! That is all there is to say. If this man can not treat your son fairly he would be otta there. Your son had your first and he WILL always be in your life.

 

hottmomaof6 - January 6

LEAVE HIM. YOUR KIDS COME FIRST!!

 

j - January 6

You should talk with to my gf - same thing.. He came around though. It's still not the same for him as having two kids, her son is HER son and her daughter is THEIR daughter. That's just how it is... Honestly, you can't expect all guys to fall over a child that is not theirs, especially if they don't like that kids father. Same with my gf... The father of her son is / was a druggie. The son acted a lot like his father which made the new guy uncomfortable... Try looking at it in your new guys view before you just "dump him"... believe it or not, men have feelings too,..

 

anita - January 6

j- there is no looking at it from her fiance's point of view b/c he is a grown man and the child is just a child. true, he may not be able to control his feelings toward the child's father, but he should never let those feelings effect the way he treats that little boy. the boy is only SIX YEARS OLD. he probably loves and admires this guy and doesn't understand what's going on. the kid can't help it if his dad's a jerk and you should never take your hatred of the father out on the child. this womans main duty is to her son...not her fiance. her fiance can take care of himself...her son can not, he needs an advocate in his corner and that advocate is supposed to be his mom. if this woman leaves her fiance b/c of this, she'll get over it and eventually even find someone else. if she continues to allow this man to treat her son like garbage, he'll never recover. i got tears in my eyes just reading about her poor son. if this man really loves this woman, he needs to start acting like an adult and be nice!

 

Dear Anita - January 6

THANKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XOXOXOXOXO

 

tori - January 11

give him a taste of reality and pitch a good fight about how your kid comes first! It will work and if he doesnt accept your son than he is not good enough for you so leave his sorry but!

 

me - January 11

In my opinion, your obligation is to your son and to keep him out of a potential harmful situation. He is too young to realize this man is annoyed by him for no good reason. Anyone who does not love you AND your son, should be kicked to the curb. Your son comes before any man. Screw what others think. Do whats right for your and your son. Good luck.

 

Rachel - January 13

A similar thing happened to me, my parents got divorced when I was like...13 or so. Well, she got married to this guy who seemed nice...When my dad died two years ago I had to move in with her. Well, long story short, I moved out and married now, but I can't go over there when he's there because he has this weird hate for me...I don't even understand it. But I kind of resent her because of the fact that she'll let some guy come between her and I...

 

Emmie - January 13

You're child is your #1 priority. This guy seems like a realy low life ...NEVER LET ANYONE TREAT YOUR CHILD THAT WAY! DO SOMETHING AND DUMP THE SCUM BAG!

 

MommyDear - January 16

Dont stay with a man who will hurt your childs life in the long run, even if its mentally. Your son is alway going to have to be number one, or it will never be a happy life for either of you.

 

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