Pregnant And About To Be Killed

17 Replies
Dazed - November 21

I found out last week i am pregnant. I think i am 6 weeks pregnant. I went to the hospital for a scan but they couldn't see anything and made me do another test which was positive. Drs had previously done one which was positive also. I wouldn't let the hospital do the internal scan. I thought i was 9 weeks but sure i couldn't be if they couldnt see anythign with the scan? I am 24, single and terrified. I cannot tell my parents. My mother was a single mother and she is going to kill me, especially when i won't tell her who the father is. He is an old friend of my brothers, years older than me and my family hate him My sister is trying to get me to have an abortion. I would love to keep it but i am too scared. Im afraid my mother will go totally crazy (she suffers from severe depression, my dad is paralysed and i have to take care of him as it is and he is wicked wicked contrary man). I am afraid the baby would look like the father so my family would figure out who it was. I'm afraid i will have nowhere to live, money etc. Im afraid of abortion because its murder, it might effect me having more kids, it might go wrong, it might freak me out. Help. How can i tell her. I have kept this a secret for almost two weeks now from her.

 

Audrey - November 21

Deciding on abortion is scary and difficult, but it sounds to me that given your situation you should consider it. If the procedure is done properly in a medical facility then you will be perfectly able to have more children. A friend of mine had two abortions when she was a teenager and went on to have three kids later. I don't care for abortion myself but sometimes it is a necessary thing, especially if the mother has health risks, does not have the means to support the child, or was impregnated by rape or incest. You can go to a clinic and speak to a doctor about your concerns. They will not tell your family and help you to make the best decision for you.

 

Angel Eyez - November 25

Hello Dazed, You are an adult now... If you are afraid to tell your mothe, then you will always be afraid of her. And then you'll be scare of everything in your life.. Personality, I would sit her down and talk to her.. Tell her that you wish to talk to her not only as Mother and Daughter, but as sisters and best friends. It's really okay to be single and pregnant. Most women are doing it as we speak, I know I'm doing it and I'm 25 now. My parents didn't agree with it either. But I told them, I'm not getting any younger, and besides, what can a man do for a child, that a woman can't do better? keep that in mind, a child needs love, give it to them. And talk with your family before someone else tells them.

 

blue - November 25

The abortion could be safe for your body, but it will destroy your soul. Adoption can be other choice, if you feel like you can't keep the baby. But I think you are old enough to get a job and take care of your baby. I am more worry about the result of your scan, why you wont let them do you a internal scan?. Don't be scared, you are stronger than you think -you are a woman! and your are not alone, the father of your baby have to help you, thats the law!

 

dazed - November 26

Hi regarding getting a job. I already have one. I've been in full time employment with the same place since i left college 5 years ago. My mother knows and she didn't go crazy. She figured it out and asked me. She cried for me as she has been in that situation. Of course she wants me to travel to the UK for an abortion. It is illegal in my country. I told her how i felt and i would love to keep it that i love it already and she said she would support me. She knows i will be kicked out of home by my father but she offered to leave with me and set up a home together. But at the end of the day she turns into a raving lunatic when i talk about keeping it. I wont tell her the father so she goes a bit nutty. They booked the appointment and flights. My next scan has been cancelled. I don't feel i have a choice. I don't feel i can do this alone. Adoption is not an option!. I had to search for my birthfather and spent all my life wondering where my father was and why he didnt want me. I'm not going to wonder where my child is. I could not carry it for nine months and give it away. It would kill me. Eitehr way this is all killing me. I cannot stop crying. Im taking folic acid and gave up drink and alcohol and i wonder why when i will be on the plane over next week. One thing is for sure after this i am sorting myself out finanically and leaving. I have already put my car up for sale. I want to get away from my family. I always thought they would support me. They are saying they will stand by me but it is all lip service as in the next breath they talk about abortion. I have enough. Thanks for the advise.

 

E - November 26

So are you aborting or keeping your baby. I am not sure what appointment you have booked. I wish you much strenght during this time and totally understand how you could not give the baby away after 9 months of pregnancy. I support you even if nobody else does:)

 

elizabeth - December 18

well girl i have to tell you i went through almost the same thing you are goin through now. you have to face your fears not for your family 's sake but for your new born baby and yourself. start now trying to do for you now and stop pleasing everyone else okay

 

Dazes - January 4

I had an abortion 3 weeks ago. It was horrible and a big mistake. But i did it and now i have to learn to live with it.

 

r - January 4

Hi Dazed, I know it was a hard decision to make having that abortion. But keep your head up high and stop telling your self it was a mistake, (also abortion this early in the pregnancy is not murder). You did what you thought was best for you at the time. If you keep telling your self it was a mistake then you will be convinced of that and moving on will be that much harder – you made a very difficult decision and that shows what a strong person you are and capable of making tough choices when many people can’t. Now it's time to move on, you said you want to sort your self out and so this is your opportunity to do so. Here is a website on abortions that I think you will find supportive of the decision you have made. http://www.imnotsorry.net please check it out. This is not the end…life will get better.

 

jackie - June 19

no no do not have an abortion that will come back on you that baby did not ask to be here and on top of that i was 17 when i had my twins yes i had two and i wonted to get an abortion but my mother told me no that is just wrong and now my boy's are 9 years old if i could do it with 2 boy's and still was in school you can too pray about that okay??????????????/

 

^^^ to TO R - October 15

You are completely out of order.You are living in a bubble, the world isnt perfect. Having a baby isnt right for some ppl and in some cases abortion is the only suitable option. im sorry you had a miscarriage but dont slate other ppls choices because you had an unfortunate loss.

 

^^^^^ - October 15

amen to that.i totally agree.

 

Question - October 16

When she say Pregnant and about to be killed seems like she is saying she having problems with the guy. Did anyone else get scared for her when they first saw this?

 

Elaine - October 17

You think I dont need a baby now,If I have an abortion now,Ican haveachild later. Ihad anabortion donebygooddoctorsandnowIcannevereverhaveababy. You riskyour own future aswellasyourchilds

 

Dazed - October 21

Just an update as i see this has been bumped up. Well it's almost a year later and as i said below yes i had an abortion. It was very hard choice and went against everything i believed in. I thought i could never do it but i guess you do not know until you are in that position and fear and panic take over. It was not an easy choice by any means and it's something i have had a very hard time tryign to deal with. I was unable to look at children for a very long time and i spiralled into clinical depression. I still get upset over it but i cannot change it. I could only learn from it. I started seeing a guy just before i had the abortion last year and i am still with him now. I have sorted myself out financially and i have now moved out of home. Targets i set that i would never be in that position again with having to listen to parents whilst i was "under their roof". I now think i may be pregnant again and i know this time even if i end up doing it alone i can and will manage. If i am pregnant i will be happy, if i am not i will also be happy. I have learned from my mistakes believe me!

 

amielia - October 23

don't worry #1, #2 keep ur baby, i just went through this and did not tell my parents i was preg untill i was 7monthes, and they felt silly for not knowing, and were there for me because they realized i was hurting trust me this may make ur mom feel good and have happier days, and since she was a single mother she can def. hlp u out. don't even worry about the guy tell ur mom he is not in the pic and u just want to focus on u and baby i am also 24 and am expecting in the next wk, my sister told me actually begged and cried to have an abortion and now look they are so excited and happy and love me, don't worry keep the baby if u want and tell ur mom when u r ready, look for cmmnty support like pregnancy crisis centers, u will just be fine it just takes alot of courage to get over that hump about ur decision, beacuse u love ur family somuch and u don't want to hurt or upset them, but if they know how u feel they will then understand, and not want u to be hurt or on ur own, take care it will be tough but u can do it , u have loads of time to get ur self prepared. god bless

 

Heather - December 31

It always makes me sad to hear when mothers chose to take the lives of their own flesh and blood. I have not walked in your shoes so I will not judge...may God forgive you...

 

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