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Hi .. I had a small tear that only required 2 st_tches, on the inside of my v____a, so I consider myself lucky. On the other hand, I have a friend who had a doctor that didn't believe in episiotomies, and she tore form her v____a to her a__s. She has has 2 plastic surgeries to repair the damage and to this day believes that she is deformed now because of it.

So kelley, did you heal quicker and how long did your pain lasts?

bump. =]

I heard that tearing is better cuz it heals faster and nicer, cuz its natural... with a scissor cut it severs certain tissues that not necessarily would tear naturally... like you wouldnt always tear an exact straight line... if you understand what I am saying... I would definately rather tear than get an episiodomy...

HI, I have had 2 girls and both times I had an episiotomy. The first time it was from one end to the other and the second maybe half of that. It did hurt during healing, but I think that you get a much more natural and clean healing with the epi. Small tears are probly not as bad, but if your Dr. lets you rip like kelly's friend than I think that you would probly vote epi anyday! It's good that you get both sides though with this forum. I will go epi with this one if given the choice. Usually the Dr. doesn't give a choice though, he just does what he thinks best or likes best so if you want it one way or the other voice your choice b4 you go into delivery!

I had 2nd degree tearing and when they st_tched me up they did it too small. So I had to go back in 8 weeks later and basically get an episiotomy (only about a cm was cut back open w/ only 2 st_tches) and that SUCKED so bad. It burned and hurt every time I went to the bathroom, even with the squirt bottle. It took 6 weeks to feel normal again, the first time I felt and looked normal after maybe 3 weeks. Plus now I have a scar "ridge" down there so that also sucks. But it needed to be fixed in order to ever have s_x comfortably again. Next time I give birth I will want to just tear again, but he is going to make sure it is st_tched up normal again.

With my DS I had 3rd degree tears..and he was only 6lbs 3 ounces! Humm I wasn't sure that you had a choice [if i'm reading your post correctly]. but in any event the recovery for me personally was quite infact very painful...i couldn't sit for long periods of time. Limping when walking. Bascially it took me 3-4 weeks to recover and heal from all of the damage that was done down there. Wish you all the best!

DONT EVER LET YOUR DOCTOR HAVE CONTROL OF YOUR BIRTH. He is being paid thousands of dollars from your insurance, AND you combined for the little time he spends in the room with you! He should be patient, and how the whole process goes from start to finish should be based on EXACTLY how you want it to go. If he acts like he is in a hurry, he is truly NOT genuine, and should not be a doctor in the first place. Doctors perform episiotomies ALL the time because they are impatient and want to get it over and done with so they can either leave, or see another patient to make more money in as little time as possible. If you refuse, they will even make you feel like you NEED one, and manipulate you in the heat of the moment! Be VERY judging when choosing your doctor, take you time, and go through a few or many if needed! and i saw great advice earlier, women doctor's are usually a better choice, not that you shouldn't be cautious of them either, but in many cases, they have been through it before, they feel for you, and they wont make cruel decisions that can effect you for weeks, months, years just to save themselves time or money. I am a Nursing a__sistant in labor and delivery, and i have seen this first hand many many many times and it infuriates me. PLEASE take complete control over your birth. let everything happen naturally, push when you feel an urge to push, rest when you feel the urge to rest. It's how it's supposed to be done! Women have done it for millions of years and it's not untill recently that EVERYONE else is in control. So cruel and unneccessary. The doctors know it to. Not only should you take control, have your husband, your mother, best friend in there who is protective of you MAKE SURE they listen to you. I feel for all of you mothers, and expecting mothers. I am pa__sionate and proud of you. And when i have my second child in March, you know i wont be afraid to tell the doctor BACK OFF, do NOT tell me what to do. Encouragement is one thing, manipulation is WRONG.

Danielle you couldnt say it better. I am sure that the vast majority here who had episiotomies had other interventions to begin with. And even a tear is much more likely to happen if the natural birthing process has already been intervened with. My 2nd dd was born at home and perfect. My 3rd will also be born at home. My 1st was a miserable hospital nightmare where the docs took over and made a huge mess.

When I had my son I had 2nd degree tears, they just let me tear I was surprised, but of course I didn't really know what to expect either. It healed up really quick though and I really didn't have a lot of pain either. I've read that an epi is much deeper and heals much slower and is more painful, and that tears heal much faster and aren't as deep of cuts.

When I had my daughter I had a 2nd degree tear, and needed 2 st_tches - I didn't feel myself tear nor did I feel my doctor st_tching me up...He left my daughter on my chest as he delivered my plaenta and st_tched me up. Even after I felt nothing. So in my case if I were to have another baby, I would just let myself tear because I had no problems whatsoever. My nurse just gave me this bottle of water and told me to squeeze water out onto the st_tches while i peed so it wouldn't hurt - I did that for about 1 week so it didnt even hurt when I peed.