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hi to all. now my period of waiting for ttc is getting over within 1 week. but now my concern is should i get pregnant immdtly? is anyone there in similar condition like me??????

i want to get pregnant immdtly. but dont know whether it is going to possible. can anyone share there experience of healthy pregnancy after pregnancy loss????

Hello Manc. My waiting period is up in about 2 weeks. My af is visiting me NOW so I was thinking after its over that will start trying. Hopefully I wont see my period again for 10 months! I hope someone responds with a positive story about a sucessful subsequent pregnancy after a loss. Im kinda worried about having a miscarriage, not only because of my recent c-section but period, I was afriad last pregnancy also because its so common. So hopefully I get preggie early to mid September and I thinking I wont tell anyone until its time for me to get me ceclage after my 1st trimester.

Manc and sarahsteele, I too am wanting to have another baby SO BADLY! I lost my little girl 2 weeks ago 2 days before a scheduled c-section. She was breech and that Saturday I stopped feeling her move. Her cord wrapped 3 times around her neck and once around her body. I was FULL TERM. 40w4d. I ended up having the c-section anyways and I am physically feeling really good and our faith has really kept DH and I ok, although I must admit there are times when I just start crying. I know all of our losses our unique, but I feel better knowing that there are people out there who have experienced the same thing. My Dr. told me to wait 4 months before ttc, but to be honest, as soon as I get the greenlight to have s_x again after my postpartum appt in 4 wks, I will not be using any forms of birth control or anything. Good luck w/ttc!

thnks for ur reply. so sorry for ur loss. i can undrstand how ur feeling rght now. & it is very difficult to believe but belive in urself. u can come out of this.

I just wanted to share my birth experience after a loss with those of you who have experienced the loss of a child and are wanting to conceive again. My daughter, Alexa, was stillborn at 38.5 weeks in Oct. 2005. She was perfect in every way. She died as a result of a cord accident. I delivered her by c-section. To those that have never lost a baby, there is no way to describe the heartache and the emptiness that I experienced and continue to deal with everyday. To the women who have posted about their losses I am so very sorry and know exactly how you are feeling. My doctor told me I could start trying to conceive again six weeks following my c-section. I was so scared of the same thing happening to another baby and having to deal with another loss that it took me awhile to mentally prepare for another pregnancy. Four months following Alexa's birth I was pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy by c-section in Oct. 2006 (a week after the birthday of Alexa). The pregnancy itself was complication free. There were no problems with the delivery and having 2 c-sections within one year was not at all a concern for my doctor. However, mentally it very traumatic for me. I was terrified the entire time of losing the baby. By the time my son arrived my nerves were shot. Alexa can never be replaced and I don't even think that my son has really helped to heal my heart any. I love him with all my heart and am so glad that he is here with us, however, I still do not feel complete and no matter how many children I have there will always be an emptiness in my life. I have never been a very religious type of person, but the only thing that got me through my subsequent pregnancy was prayer. I wish all of you the best of luck with trying to conceive and with your subsequent pregnancies. I hope you all experience the miracle of a child and that you can find peace in your hearts.

Thank you so much for your post ertel! I too struggle with wanting a child right away and the fears that it will be a complicated pregnancy and what not because I elected to deliver Brooke by c-section. Physically I am healing great, although I do have emotional rough spots. I have spent so much time in prayer the last 2 1/2 weeks and I have come to understand that God has a plan for me, although I am angry at times because I don't understand His ways. I can't believe how many women have lost their babies. Did you feel like I did? I said that nobody prepares you to lose your child to a cord accident at full term. In fact, I sailed through everything in my pregnancy. My measurements were normal, as well as Brooke's HB every appointment. They tell you all the markers to get past (12 wks, 24 wks, 28 wks) and they make it sound like you're home free after 36 wks. Nobody tells you that you will make it full term and a cord accident will happen, or you just don't think of it because they say it is so rare. Anyways, on your subsequent pregnancy did you see a regular OB/GYN or did you go to a perinatologist? Did you request more u/s and did you schedule a c-section as soon as your son was ready to come out? These are all things I am thinking of for my next pregnancy. Also, this sounds really bad, but did you feel disappointed when you found out he was a boy? I know that I will be grateful for another child, but deep down I want another girl because I want to be able to use everything I have for Brooke and in some ways live out what I had imagined doing with her. In some ways I feel guilty about this.

Tami, I just wrote a huge long post about how I have been feeling and my stupid computer flaked out on me. I have been reading a lot and also have come to understand that what I am feeling is completely normal. It feels good to talk to other women who have experienced the same thing. In fact, my neighbor across the street suffered a stillborn as well and talking to her made me feel better. She is one of the few people who was able to provide words of comfort and one thing that she said to me really stuck out. I told her that when I cry it is usually over the things that I'm not going to be able to do with Brooke, like take her to school, or dress her for ballet cla__s, or see her go to prom, or even her daddy walking her down the isle. She said, "You know what, we're not guaranteed those things anyways, even when we give birth to beautiful healthy children." That's so true My pastor also said at her memorial service that maybe God saw something far more painful in the future that we couldn't have handled. Although it's hard to think of anything more painful, I know that there are things more painful. I couldn't imagine her being diagnosed with terminal cancer as a kid or having her abducted and molested and murdered. Those things would have been far more painful. Did you hold Alexa after your c-section? At first I was scared to hold Brooke (going into the procedure), but the minute she was out Cody and I wanted to hold her and I am so glad that we did. She had my nose and lips and everything else was Cody. She was so beautiful to me. She was our first child. It's funny because she was not an expected pregnancy (we had only been married for 3 months), and then for us to be like, we want another one is kind of funny. I was also able to stay with her in the recovery room for 5 hours because there were no other c-sections that night. They even let my family in to hold her and stuff like that. Cody and I are young, 24 and 22 respectively, so the logical part of me says we will have plenty of opportunity for other children, but there's always that "What if?" in the back of my mind. I'm also scared because I can't bear the thought of losing another child, although in a strange way I was relieved when the doctor told me during the c-section that it was an obvious cord accident and that we didn't have to have an autopsy performed. At least I know it wasn't something I did or ate or had a disease, or something of that nature. I also took many pictures of her and they give me peace when I fall apart because she just looks asleep. I have my moments, but I find that things do get better and I have been able to laugh at things and see hope in my life, although it's like that phrase "One step forward two steps back." Please feel free to continue posting on here or shooting me an e-mail at ksandoval84 at gmail dot com. I feel so much better being able to talk to someone who has walked in my shoes. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers as well. Katie

Hello CodyKatie. I've been reading all the responses but was apprehensive to b___t in. hehe. Well I just wanted to say that I told my husband the very thing that your pastor said at your daughters memorial and he thought I was insane. He had the nerve to get upset that I would say that about God. I didn't mean any harm by it, it was just the only reason that can even come close to justifing why our precious daughter was taken from us 9 and a half hours after her life started. It made me feel an ounce better to think that God was somehow saving us from something way more painful. After the reaction I got from him I never told anyone else my theory. I was angry with God for a while for giving me such a gift and snatch it back like he was teasing me or something that the theory your pastor told you actually helped me heal my relationship with God. I know this sounds werid to some people who might read this but it is just some of the emotions that I have been going through in the very hard time. Nothing is normal about this situation so people are bound to think outside the box or whatever.

Shoppingfortwo, I know how you feel about being angry with God. I know that he puts us through trials so we will perservere in our faith, it just sucks that our trials have to be of this magnitude. I have a devotional every morning that I do which honestly does provide me with comfort, but that doesn't mean that I don't have times where I'm angry with Him. He can handle it though. I compare my anger to the relationship I had with my mom when I was younger. I love my mom very very much, but when I was a little girl she wouldn't let me go to a friend's house if she didn't know their parents. I never understood why she would do that. Now that I am older, I understand that she was concerned that they could have been a molester or something like that. At the time, I would be angry with her for not letting me go, although I still loved her deep down. That's how I feel with God right now. I love Him, but I am angry with Him because I do not see what He sees and I know that I won't understand until I go to heaven. I am fortunate though that my husband is also a believer and that this experience has drawn us closer and deeper in our faith. I also read your post about being apprehensive to ttc. I feel the same way as you, but the truth is that I was also scared of m/c when I was pregnant with Brooke, so I think that will just continue to be there. I will keep you in my prayers as well and I don't mind anyone "b___ting" in. I find that the more to talk to the better. It's funny how this is on the c-section board and not on the pregnancy loss board. I've found more of a connection on this one.

I totally understand your metaphor about how we felt towards our mothers when they were protective of us when we were younger and how that's the same with us and God right now. (I feel the excat same way that's why I say "we") It will get better. Some days will be better than others of course. I was soooo disappointed in the hospital in the days following my daughters birth and death. (Oh and I named my daughter Victoria Brooke, so we both have Brooke's) Anyway, I was so disappointed because I was on bedrest in the hospital with my feet above my head 5cm dilated for 7 days praying praying praying that my daughter would stay inside and that she would survive when she was born. My husband and I prayed soooooooo much! Our families, friends, co-workers, neighbors, hospital staff and even other patients that were going through the same excat thing were praying for our baby girl. I can't even begin to explain my shock to see my husband or mother (I forgot) holding my daughter when I woke up from my c section. My heart broke in a trillion particles that very second my eyes laid upon her because my worst fears had come true and I realize her doctors had given up on her and her survival and that she was dead or would soon die. All my praying did NOTHING! I was so confused, sad, hurt, angry, depressed, shocked. I just couldn't believe what I was going through. Couldn't believe it was me, couldn't believe that was happening. Yah it sucks. I hate reliving that day but I some how do everyday. I'm sorry but all this typing has made me forget what my point of this post was. Oh, the angry at God thing. Yah, I'll get over my anger I guess, I'm too afriad to live my life without religion and prayer so I guess I have no choice. Bad things happen no matter what. No matter what. On a different subject really quick since this is getting long. My 1st day of ttc was yesterday. It was the 1st day after my period stopped and I tried to figure out when I ovulate but I don't know how many days is in my cycle so we've decided to just have s_x everyday or at least every other day. I don't want to wait months to track my period I used to when I was using the nuva-ring as birth control but that was almost a year ago. But I think our plan is a good one. S_x everyday! How can we miss? Ok well pray for us please we need all the help that we can get. We will keep everyone in our prayers as well. One last thing. I was deathly afriad of miscarriage with Victoria Brooke as well due to all the stuff I read about it the second I found out I was preggie. I was so happy to make it past the 1st trimester and held my breath every prenantal visit until they found the heart beat. EVERYTIME! Kinda physco I know. So I know I'll be very cautious and worried my next pregnancy. Oh well its worth it. I work at a hospital (Kaiser) now so if I need reasurance I'll go see my doctor right away anytime. Ok thanks for reading.

Shopping, I understand completely how you feel about unanswered prayers. I prayed so hard that morning that I stopped feeling her move that I would feel movement. NOTHING. DH and I faithfully go to church (he plays in the worship team) and I felt like I was really trying to live a good life, although nobody is perfect. I too relive that awful day in my head, as much as I try not to. Actually, I like reliving the c-section and after it because I got to hold Brooke and spend time with her, but the time leading up to that I just try to shut out because that was just awful. A friend of mine from church gave me a book called "Streams in the Desert." It's a really good devotional book that I have found so much comfort in and it helps me with my relationship with God. I read it every morning and the reading takes only a few minutes, but it makes me feel so much better. I picked mine up at Barnes & Noble in the Christian reading section. I've also started writing letters to God about how I feel. I type a lot faster than I write, so I just do it on the computer, but I feel a lot better after writing. It's so hard because everything I read says to trust in Him, but I told Him that it's difficult to trust Him when I feel like He let me down and didn't listen to my prayers. I still struggle with wanting Him to conform to my plan, not me conforming to His. I know I have to work on that. It's funny because my whole life I have been afraid of thunder and lightening and we have had thunderstorms here the past few days. For the first time in my life I want to just stand out in the storm and be like "Bring it on!" My dad says it's like that scene in Forrest Gump where Lieutenant Dan makes his peace with God during the hurricane at sea, when he's up on the mast shouting, "You call this a storm? Bring it on you S.O.B." I said, yeah, that's how I feel right now. But I know God can handle my anger and He knows what truly is in my heart, and He knows what's in your's as well. I really do suggest that book though. It gets my day off to a good start.

I totally understand what your saying. . . I'm going to get that book.