IS ANYONE ELSE DEALING WITH PARENTS THAT PLAY FAVORITES
7 Replies
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I'm sorry, I just need to vent and see if anyone else has insane moms. My mom has 6 of us, Aged 6-24. My brother, the 24 year old, has 2 kids, as do I. But my mom thinks that because my husband works, he should have to "buy" things from my brother because he has a "harder time with money." He works on and off because he is always getting fired for not showing up. In my family someone who isn't living off aid is a rare occurance. But me and my husband bought a babybed from him because we needed a bed and he needed the money. Well we paid 100 for it and before we could pick it up, they got into a fight and broke it. We didn't get our money back and had to spend 150 on a brand new one. Same thing with the swing. My mom whined at me non-stop because Donny needs money and Zane needs a swing. So we bought it for 25 and his 2 year old broke it! Now he is staying at my moms and they are using the spare diapers I left there for my boys and using the swing we had to buy from the store with no intention on paying us back for it. They even used the extra formula because their 3 month old didn't have anything to eat because they didn't bring any formula when they came back. Me and My husband work hard and money is really tight for us. Whenever I complain to her about it she tells me to "think of the babies." What she means is think of HIS babies because she doesn't think twice before telling me when they need stuff. Not going down there isn't an option because my 6 year old sister cries if she don't see me once a week and my older sister who lives at home is my best friend. It's funny how I'm the youngest of 4 older kids (I'm 17) and yet I am the only one who isn't living off aid or with my parents. Because of that they want us to buy everything! BTW, my dad is a really bad drunk so he sells the foodstamps they do get to get drunk on them, then wants us to buy the groceries for us 4 and all 7 of them. Then get p___sed when we say we don't have the money! Anyone has have a psycho family or am I alone?
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Your mother expects her 17 year old daughter to support her family? Sorry, but in my family, you wouldn't be allowed to be married, and you'd still be considered a child. If I had gotten married at 17, or had 2 kids at that age, I would've been disowned. I think you should sit down with your mom and tell her how effed up it is that she's expecting a 17 year old, who should still be in high school, to support everyone else.
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Hey girl,
A drunk dad isnt a pretty picture, sorry u have to see that, i dont know ur family but it sounds like they r hard work haha, i had to laugh at ur anyone else have a psycho family, i think everyone thought they did til they read ur story. j/k. Its ur dad who needs to get his act together, he should be buying the groceries,, u need to have a chat to ur mother about why she is still putting up with a drunk who isnt taking her far in life to the point where their young daughter and partner need to pay for the groceries, u know the answer seriously stop giving them handouts cause it will be all u do for the rest of ur life, dad needs to change big time and if he doesnt then maybe some of the others need to get off their fat a__ses and get a job eh, stop giving girl cause it sounds like theres no guilt involved with any of the taking... make it clear u come to visit, ur not a bank as there are 4 mouths to feed at ur own house... u have 2 kids, 17 and married, u grew up b4 me, hope it all gets better with ya family and u sound quite mature for ur age by the way cause u seem to have alot to take on board... cheers ally
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I'm sorry about your situation. i think your mom is probably very proud of for making it on your own but just doesn't tell you!! Maybe you shoudn't leave your kids stuff over at your moms, so they can't use it, and just bring it whenevr you are going there. I have a problem with my mil and how she takes care of my baby, it drives me crazy, like she won't strap her into her carseat and smokes cigarettes around her qnd other silly stuff like not even washing new clothes before putting it on her, and then she has the nerve to tell me that the baby gets rashes from not being clean!!!!! arggghhh! I hate her! we all gotta deal with this stuff I guess
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I honestly think that I would RATHER be disowned. I don't leave our stuff down there they actually come here to get it cause they say they need it. The only reason I put up with giving them stuff is because I know me and my husband take care of our boys. My neice and nephew aren't so lucky. I couldn't turn down helping an almost 3 year old and 3 month old. But I do not help my brother and his gf.They are old enough to get stuff on their own. My mom and dad hqave been off and on since I can remember, yet have never gotten a divorce. My dad has went so far as to say if he had to choose between one of us dying or to quit drinking, he would choose we die because we're all going to die anyway. I appreciate the fedback and encouragement because aside from my husband and big sis I don't get that. And Jamie, I have been with my husband since I was barely 15 and I will be 18 in 3 months. I have been grown in matter of mind since I was about 12 and had to stay home and care for my then 5 and 1.5 year old sisters while my mom went to work. I figure that if I am able to grow up enough at 12 to take care of two little girls then I am old enough to reap the rewards of maturity at 17. Thank you for your responses. I really appreciate the support. Thank you.
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It's time to distance yourself from your family, at least a little bit. They're not being very realistic expecting you to provide for them. Stop giving them anything...say you're saving up for a house, or for one of you to go back to school, or just use the general excuse "times are tough right now." Don't tell them how much money you make and don't tell them when you need something...just go buy it. Your family taking advantage of you is going to end up putting a strain on your marriage. If everyone else in your family is on public a__sistance, they can get their own formula and diapers and whatever else they need. Their kids won't really go without--instead your brother will be forced to be a man and keep a regular job. Good luck, it sounds like you've done well with your own personal situation, just don't let your family become a burden to you.
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I didn't mean to offend you with my response and I'm sorry if I did.
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Thank you to all who posted a response to me. I really appreciate the advice and feedback. The only problem is with my family, there is no reasoning. It's their way or no way. Again thanks to all. And Jamie, I am sorry I got snippy with you. As you can tell I have been under stress. :o)
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