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Boy- I don't know if that is normal or not, but I worry that I will be in the same boat as you. I haven't had s_x since probably September and won't be allowed until January per my OB. Sadly, my hubby does not seem fazed by this and is a little too okay with it. He is the kind of guy who takes matters into his own hand, if you catch my drift. I would hope he will eventually prefer me to old Rosey Palmer, but he may be getting lazy now. Does your husband take matters into his own hand? Maybe he's gotten lazy. Or, did he watch the birth of your dd? I have worried that will affect my husband's interest in me as well. Lastly, not to harsh, but are you back to your pre-pregnancy weight? You know how some guys are about that.

Anyway, I think you should ask him what is up so you guys can get back on track with your s_x life.

i don't know about normal but my dh is practically the same way. he doesn't think s_x is a big deal. he says, basically that he's past his s_xual peak but he's only 29! he doesn't understand that it's not just the s_x that i miss, that it's feeling desirable. this issue used to make me cry a lot, but lately i've been forcing myself to lose interst, just like him. i don't think this is the most healthy response at all, but it's a heck of a lot better than getting sad about it all the time. the next time he actually wants s_x i'm gonna make him work for it. the admits that he enjoys "the chase". i'd like to be chased and romanced too. i just hope i won't be waiting for him to come around forever. not sure how to help you. when i figure it out i'll tell you

i guess i'm not alone, i do feel sad about it because i dont feel loved or wanted. i was actually very lucky on loosing my preg weight i was under weight before and had no curves no i actually have a b**t and bo**s i didnt have before. i really dont think its my body the issue and i dont think he takes matters into his own hands either (or that i know of) he's just not interrested when its time to go to bed he'll say "oh i'm so tired" and go to sleep. i cry myself to sleep a lot just because i feel so lonely and not appreciated. i work and take care of my dd, i keep the house clean, i dont do much cooking tho. i seriously think of leaving him sometimes but i will never do it because my parents were divorced and i always wanted a real family. i want to give my dd what i didnt have....thanxs for listening.

wow, you and i sound so similar is wierd! i don't consider divorce but sometimes i wonder if i rushed into getting married and having a baby, though i'd never take back what i've done. i've cried myself to sleep many times.

to- i know how you must feel yeah i feel the same way i think i might have rushed into to things. i love my dd so much but i miss my old life. it doesnt help either that because i got married and have a baby i also have family problems my dad practically disowned me and he didnt walk me down the isle like i always dreamed. i know thats not my fault but it brings me to tears everytime i think about that day. thanxs again for listening to me.

Maybe he is stressed and under a lot of pressure right now. Has he recently had to take on more responsibility? I mean other than the obvious of being a Daddy. There was a time that my husband got promoted and while transitioning he had to work a lot of extra hours and late nights. Plus he had to get up early the next morning. During that transition he wasn't all that interested and hardly ever initiated. You should try and talk about it to him and tell him that you are missing being intimate.

Maybe you guys need to make an effort once a week to spend time together, like a date night. Can anyone watch your dd for a few hours one night a week so you two can get away and be alone?

awww that's sad. i've had a somewhat dysfuntional childhood too. my father died when i was 9, so i didn't have anyone walk me down the aisle either. i think it'd be worse if he was alive and still wasn't there though. i don't know about "wondering" but with me, it's not his job or the baby. things have kinda been like this for awhile. i was hoping things would change, he promised they would once we got married (he doesn't really approve about premarital stuff). a date night would be nice, maybe when the baby is older.

haha, i just realized i called myself "what" instead of "how"

i think maybe date night can work for us, we have been very busy with the baby and all. maybe we just need to spend some time alone. thank you all for your input.

When I am trying to get my husband interested, I will start by rubbing his back and shoulders. For some reason, that always works. But I hate having to be the one to initiate things, and sometimes I want to do something cuddly and he decides to do something freaky instead. I think it's pretty normal for s_x to taper off a bit once you're married, and then even more once you have a baby. When my husband and I were dating, he could spend hours in bed with me, like maybe 5 separate acts in a row, then we'd go to work for a few hours, back to his place, and another two or three times. When we were first married it got down to once a day, then to maybe three times a week. We tried really hard to get pregnant and that took a lot of fun out of s_x. Two kids later, we're down to once a week, if that.