Custody Questions Please Help

14 Replies
thegame31 - December 14

ive been seeing this guy now for 7 months, when we got together he told me his ex was pregnant, i didnt have a problem with it or anything.. the baby is now a few weeks old... the thing is the ex wont let him anywhere near the baby, his name is tyler... she didnt tell him when he was born, she didnt even let him know she named him, let alone let him have some input... and it seems like she wont let him see tyler because shes jealous of me... my boyfriend has offered her child support, offered to help, EVERYTHING and she still wont let him see tyler, its realllly starting to upset him and he doesnt know what to do, he threatened to take her to court and she said the day she gets a court summons she take tyler and her other child (which isnt his) and leave and never be found... has any men or women got any advice for us? i hate seeing him like this, he sees a baby in the street and he turns his head like hes going to cry! we live in australia.. my boyfriend is 20 and im 18 :) any help you could give would be SOOOO appreciated!!


lilmomma2b - December 15

Tell him to go to court NOW! Until he does he cant make her let him see the baby. She's not gonna run with the kids she's just trying to scare him. I dont know how the laws are in australia but he needs to get a lawyer right away, tell the lawyer she said she will run, maybe they can give a court order not allowing her to leave. But he doesnt need to beg her anymore to see his child, dont play her games! She's using that baby to hurt him, she's selfish!


lenae - January 6

Also doc_ment every time he tries to see him and she refuses. This will help his case. But definately get into court and make sure they know she said she'd run. He has rights and she is violating those rights and the rights of his baby. The baby has the right to know his daddy.


kay101 - January 6

It's very easy to go to court and file for custody. USUALLY custody is awarded to the mother unless she has an unfit living environment for the child. What they really do now is call it joint legal custody, with the mother having sole physical custody. Basically the child resides with the mother, and the father has visitation. As long as he isn't trying to get full custody and tells the judge he just wants to see his child, the time spent in the courtroom should be very short. They aren't going to tell him he can't see the baby. My daughter's father and I spent, I kid you not, less than five minutes infront of the judge for our custody hearing.


thegame31 - January 7

thanks everyone, well hes worried about the money side of things, as in how much its all going to cost to take her to court.. and the mother already has a 4 year old daughter to another guy, my bf said the father of that child would come over with toys and clothes, and after he would leave, she would throw them in the dirt.. once he gave his daughter a little tricycle bike thing for her bday, and as SOON as he left, she got in her car and ran over it... i guess my bf is worried if he even tries to give her things for his son she will do the same with the little money he has to spend on him.. not to menchion the hateful things she will say to him when hes older... her daughter is scared stiff of her father because the mother just brainwashed her into thinking he was a bad person, my bfs mother is being a right little b___h about it too... the ex lets my bfs mum go over there and see his son (just to get information about my bf and me, his mum has a big mouth and tells her everything she wants to know about our personal life) and then his mum comes home & tells him what a horrible person he is and wont tell him ANYTHING about HIS baby... i mean he was in hospital for something and his mum knew and wouldnt even tell him if he was ok! then she tried to get them back together just so she gets more time with her grandchild! needless to say i was pretty annoyed and refuse to acknowledge her anymore... i told her she better be happy with that one grandchild because the child that i have wont be going anywhere near her! and my bf agrees :) sorry its so long, i needed to vent! lol


wennyk - January 7

my friend just went through the same thing,Go to court, if she takes off with tyler without his consent, she could be charged with kidnapping, and then he will get full custody.


bree_n_liseys_mommy - January 9

not if he is not on the birth certificate. then they will have to do DNA or rather a blood test to verify that he is in fact the father.


thegame31 - January 9

does anyone know how much dna tests cost in australia? and would he have to pay for it or would she? because she was the one that didnt put him on the birth certificate


jeni23 - January 10

doesnt matter theyd still make him pay.thats what my sisters husband had done to him.poopy but true.but its well worth the money.good luck


hello - January 14

Hi, i am in australia too... This lady sounds like quite a charming ex to have.. My daughters dad left me and thank christ we r civil and he comes here every 2nd saturday..... He has had numerous partners since he left me but what he does with his social life has nothing to do with the right to see his child.... Legally she cannot stop you, it is against the law.... Maybe legal aid can help...Court will allow him every 2nd weekend from fri to sunday unless this lady is b___stfeeding then they arrange something else....I think from one onwards its every second weekend legal aid, that is who i called when i thought i was once gonna have trouble..they told me everything i wanted to know.......she cant just up and leave, go to court and she definitely cant up and leave.... she chose not to be civilised with this matter, u have to act accordingly and sadly be the same if u are to get anywhere........i am in aus, have been there if u need advice.... I say to my daughters dad all the time how lucky we r that we never went to court and sorted things out amicably.....i am sorry for what ur partner is going thru and i admire him wanting to be a part of his sons life.....I do want to say one thing though and i really dont want you to get angry, be weary of someone who walks out on a pregnant girlfriend, thats all i am going to say... My ex walked out on 3 kids, i should have realised that was a red flag for sure.........take care


hello - January 14

I think dna tests cost 1000 bucks plus.... How did she get away with not putting his name on it cause thats another story and thats where u have a problem .....please call legal aid......... i tried to not have my exes name on my daughters birth cert and they wouldn't let me .unless she said she didnt know who the father was....keep in touch,


thegame31 - January 14

hey hello.. i have no idea how she got away with the birth certificate thing... yeah, shes a nasty girl.. about the walking out on the pregnant gf thing, dw.. im not angry lol... i felt the same way when we first got together and he told me.. but this girl has a kid to another guy already and when my bf was going out with her.. told him she was pregnant 3 times and every single time she was lying.. anyway, he said he didnt want to be with her anymore and THEN she goes "you cant leave me, im pregnant" and he went yeah right, and left... well thats what he said.. and i do believe him.. shes nuts i tell ya! lol.. thanks for all the advice... he really wants to have a part in tylers life... the only thing hes worried about is how tyler is going to feel towards him and treat him when hes old enough to listen to what his mother says about him... my parents are divorced and i hated mty father for a ages because my mum said horrible things about him.. it wasnt until i was about 16-17 that i realised he wasnt like that.. but my bf is scared his son isnt going to realise and is going to listen to the c___p his mother spins.. thanks for all your advice and encouragement.. it really helped! how old is your DD?


hello - January 15

She is 19 months old now, he left when she was 4 months old so theres been lots happen inbetween, he even regretted it and wanted to come back but although he has 3 other kids and said he wanted a child, he is no father figure. He's the 40 yr old midlife crisis party on man who has already cheated on his 2 month old girlfriend... I am not gonna go on cause although we once had a great 4 yrs, he isnt one to settle down and kids hold up his social life.....thanks for listening to the vent hah.... your boyfriend has to take that risk on what this woman will say, its like i said to you, his social life has nothing to do with his fatherhood... Its admirable he wants to be a part of his childs life being only 20. This lady does sound like she is going to be a pain in the a__s. Its hard too cause i am on the other end of it and i feel for my daughter having split parents and wish sometimes he would have let us live in peace... Make sense? I can see both sides to the story u know and i imagine she must be pretty p__sed that he walked out on her being pregnant..obviously i dont know the full story.... in the end theres the easy way or the hard way and these things dont have to become court matters but the people involved need to act human and not like animals and i am afraid she is doing just that.... Like i said i am glad my situation is not like that...... she may think he wont take her to court, make sure he does okay....... .. She can say whatever she likes to her child but if theres a bond then there will always be a bond with the father.... He needs to get access now cause the bond starts right from birth .......good luck


irisa - February 17

i am a 17 year old teen mom and i am tryin to get full custody of ma daughter who is 10 months old. Her dad doesnt help out with her i live with my mom and she supports me and my daughetr financially. I however provide for my daughter physically mentally and emotionally. I also am trying to put child support on him. I need advice please help.


hello - April 27

i am responding to an email i received, dont know how i did receive it......from irisra......



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