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Oh, lol about the animal argument. We are animals, no doubt. As far as reasoning goes, yes, non-human primates have been shown to reason. I do not know what it has to do with co-sleeping.

Everything is inherently dangerous. Heck, oxygen itself is highly explosive and flammable. Are we gonna stop giving it to our kids? No. D, I'm guessing you either never saw Finding Nemo, or you missed the moral of the story entirely. If you attempt to protect your child from every bad or negative experience, he/she will never know the good or positive experiences. Your sleep situation may work for you, but for me, it would deprive my daughter of a natural comfort. It will be interesting to see who's child is in therapy in 40 years - yours, or mine. Personally, I think it'll be yours, because mine has learned from birth that mom and dad will always be there, if only to hold her while she cries.

I am not depriving my child of any comfort. I spend a lot of time with my child. Also, I know his last feeding is around 9ish which I give and like I stated before, he does fall asleep with me. I find that even he wants to turn and find my bed after he eats which I then transfer him into his crib. I think it is a low b__w to say that my child will be in therapy, you are only being defensive. I was not the one who brought up animals. So you think animals can reason to better themselves? I take death seriously. Are people morons or are they ignorant in not knowing the facts and dangers that can exist in co-sleeping. You want to do it fine. But as for me I told you my reasons. Moreover, I am not overprotecting my child in everything in this world as you say. Oxygen? Are you serious.

I'm sorry Jamie, but that sounds a little mean to me. I think that there is any telling whose child would need therapy because of co-sleeping. My child does not co-sleep but you better believe that we hold him and comfort him everytime he needs it and the same could go for D. I think that we have to realize that there are different methods to raising our children and acceptance and understanding is needed. We as women should not bash one another for the choices that we make, unless it is putting the child in absolute danger. My mother co-slept with me because she had me when she was 19 and only had a bed, no crib. With her other 7 children that she had after me, she did not. My bond with my mother is no different from the bond that she has with my siblings. They do not need to frequent anybody's couch about as much as anyone would need it. Again, just my opinion!!

My brother and I never slept with our parents, and we turned out just fine. I personally will not co-sleep with my baby. My hubby is deep sleeper, I toss/turn a ton, and our 100+ lb dog has slept between us since puppyhood. I also won't have a ba__sinet--baby will sleep in its own crib in its own room. I'm not nursing, so i'll have to get up to feed anyways. I've seen effect of co-sleeping had on my best friends. She co-slept with him as baby, and then couldn't break habit, and now her son is 6 yrs old and only in the last year did he start sleeping in his own bed/room, and still sometimes she lets him with them. her poor hubby never got any...

Perhaps the therapy comment was out of line; if so, I apologize. However, D, I do take offense to your "holier than thou" att_tude. I also wasn't the one to bring up the animal arguement, though I did defend it. Nor did I tell co-sleepers or non-co-sleepers that they were jeopardizing the lives of their children with their sleeping choices. Nor did I attempt to imply that their sleeping arrangements would be detrimental to other children or marriages. I am now bowing out of this discussion.

I AM the one who brought up the animal comparison, and funny thing is, I didn't do it to start a debate on death, sneakers, therapy or who does or doesn't roll onto their kids.I did it to show how primal instincts are being ignored for the sake of "higher reasoning". If you watch enough National Geographic during those 4 am feedings, you'll see that animals, in their primate and barbaric minds, have quite the society within their own species. Everything from how they mate, to how the-yes, protect their young.I simply stated that it's funny, that we as humans, expect our young to sleep alone, that's all. Yes, there are accidents. There have been for centuries. Preventable ones? SURE! But that does not mean that we must live our lives in bubbles, as well as forcing our children to do what 'society' and Dr. Sears tells us. (last generation SWORE by Dr. spock... where's he NOW? Many years before, even Freud was a genius... p___s envy anyone?) I think we should not ignore what is natural because of what 'might' happen. If you and your baby co-sleep or not, to each their own. And as for never getting them out of bed, well, my 6 year old co-slept with me too, and he was in his own bed whenever I put him there, no problem. I think it all comes down to your child's level of comfort. As for hubby not gettin' any because of co-sleeping .... well, ever heard of a Nooner? ;)

For anyone reading this site, there are pros and cons to this topic with a lot of people taking either side. Not just here. I think its important to know both sides. I am not telling people what to do. What they decide to do is a personal choice but I think its good to know both sides and make an informative decision. Look at it and debate objectively not subjectively. For those who would like to know what I just read on the internet, is that co-sleeping is a convience for b___stfeeding and to get an infant or even older child to sleep. If co-sleeping is long-term your baby gets used to you being next to him/her and will not accept others for nap time if you happen to have a relative or someone babysit one day. If co-sleeping is long-term the transition from family bed to own bed will be long and tiring. Children will take a long time to be independent because of their lack of self-steem. Teaching a child to be independent begins as early as infancy. According to most experts and the American Academy of Pediatrics, do not promote co-sleeping because it causes sleep disorders and problems with psychos_xual development. Someone recommended that convience to sleep should not be an excuse to put your child at risk of afffecting self-esteem and accidental suffocation. If you want to read more just look up pros and cons of cosleeping.

Sorry, d, but there is absolutely no consensus about co-sleeping and its percieved dangers. Lovely, Dr. Sears promotes co-sleeping if it is in the best interest of the family. I was not bashing your argument about animals and their cognitive abilities, or lack of, but did not understand why it was being discussed with regards to cosleeping. I see your point now:) Now, when a mother has to take care of her baby all day, she will need a decent nights sleep to function well as a parent. For some moms, that can only be achieved by co-sleeping. I truly think that this is one controversy that cannot be generalized to other families. This is as personal of a decision as is b___stfeeding. It may work for you, but not necessarily for me. My situation (w/ co-sleeping) worked out quite well. I would not have changed a thing. If your infant sleeps well in his crib, that's great! You probably got laid more than I did:)

I just saw this on the news about 2 minutes ago. Click on to pulse24.com about safe sleeping to read further if you want. It talks about sids but I think its good to know about. Courtesy American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP)New Guidelines Medical Specialist Karl Kabasele outlines the latest recommendations to protect your child from SIDS. In an effort to reduce the number of sudden infant deaths, the American Academy of Pediatrics has released new recommendations on how to put your child to sleep at night. Among their suggestions: babies should be offered pacifiers at bedtime, they should sleep in their parents’ room, but not in their beds, and they should be put down on their backs, not their stomachs or their sides. The measures could help prevent babies from falling into too deep a slumber – which is a problem for infants prone to SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome). Though the SIDS death rate has fallen dramatically over the past several years, it is still the leading cause of death in U.S. infants between the ages of one month and one year, killing 2,000 children there annually. "We should be able to do something about that," said Dr. John Kattwinkel of the University of Virginia, chairman of the academy's SIDS task force. SIDS is defined as the sudden death of an infant, often during sleep, that remains unanswered after autopsy and other examinations. Breastfeeding supporters had, in the past, advocated letting infants share their parents’ bed to make nighttime nursing easier. They also worried pacifier use might interfere with nursing. However, the new policies were created with both issues in mind - recommending delaying pacifier use until after the child is a month old "to ensure that b___stfeeding is firmly established." The AAP also says placing cribs near the parents' bed makes b___stfeeding more convenient, while minimizing the SIDS risk. They specify that pacifiers offered at bedtime should not be reinserted if they fall out during sleep, shouldn’t be coated in sweet substances, nor should they be forced on infants who don’t want them. Dr. Stephen Sheldon, director of the sleep medicine center at Chicago's Children's Memorial Hospital, says pacifiers help babies to swallow. The new policy, which updates the academy's 2000 SIDS guidelines, also says that the only recommended sleep position for infants is on their backs. In a past doc_ment, they’d said that side sleeping was a less favourable – but still acceptable - position. However, now they say that even that’s too risky because the child could roll over onto its stomach. In 1992, 4,660 U.S. infant deaths were attributed to SIDS. That annual number fell to about 2,800 in 1998, and by 2002, the reported number had dropped to 2,295. The American Academy of Pediatrics policy recommendations include: · Infants should be placed for sleep in a supine (wholly on back position) for every sleep, not on their stomach or on their side. · Use a firm sleep surface - a firm crib mattress, covered by a sheet, is the recommended sleeping surface. · Keep soft objects and loose bedding out of the crib - pillows, quilts, comforters, sheepskins, stuffed toys and other soft objects should be kept out of an infant’s sleeping environment. · Do not smoke during pregnancy – also, avoiding an infant’s exposure to second-hand smoke is advisable for numerous reasons in addition to SIDS risk. · A separate but nearby sleeping environment is recommended such as a separate crib in the parent’s bedroom. Bed sharing during sleep is not recommended.

I know I said I bowed out, but I have to disagree with the self-esteem. I think that co-sleeping provides a sense of comfort, and sleeping in a crib in a separate room will cause a sense of abandonment. My 12 week old already has bad dreams, probably of her immunizations, because that's when they started. She will whimper and whine in her sleep, until something wakes her up; when she wakes up, she sees Mom on one side, and Dad on the other, and knows that there's nothing to be afraid of. Were she in a crib, she'd wake up alone, in a dark room. Where's the comfort in that? As far as sleeping with babysitters - my daughter only co-sleeps at night; she sleeps alone quite well during the day. I think that knowing that mom and dad are there to protect her when it's scary (isn't being afraid of the dark the most common childhood fear?) will help her to *not* be scared, and thus give her more independance and strength. Also, with my husband being in the military, we *will* be moving frequently, and my husband won't always be there. Co-sleeping now helps create a stability that is dependant on people, not places or things, which is what we need in our situation, because the places and things will change; also, it creates a relationship and familiarity with my husband that will be important when he deploys - she'll still know him, even while he's gone, because she's spent the last 12 weeks becoming familiar with his scent, breathing, heartbeat, etc, a familiarity she would be deprived of if she slept in a crib, because he gets home at 5:30 pm, she goes to bed at 8:30, he leaves at 5:30 a.m. and she doesn't get up til sometime between 7 and 9 a.m. (except for the 5 am feed caused by my husband's alarm clock.)

I too am guilty; last night was the first night that I did this. Since my husband is gone for a while now, it is just so much easier for me to let my daughter sleep in bed with me. She was so fussy last night, and finally fell asleep laying down nursing. My husband used to take the night shift, so I'm really just looking for a reasonable solution that allows both of us sleep.

Everyone does what they have to do to get some sleep and to do what feels right in their situation. Everyone here are obviously good parents if they care enough to seek advice and help others. That is exactly what we should be doing, not bashing each other or jumping to conclusions so often. It is as personal a choice whether or not you co sleep as it is whether to bottle or b___st feed.There are no right or wrong, black or white discussions with many aspects of how we raise our own kids. And I bet they all turn out okay.

Nobody that chooses to co sleep should have to put in their response that they are "guilty" either. Nobody is guilty of doing anything wrong either way.

I totally agree with you Rachael. So many times we as parents are made to feel guilty if we do not do things the "right" way. I decided to pump and feed my son through a bottle instead of b___st to mouth and people really could be hurtful. I do not co-sleep but I will not promote bashing of those who do.

I think there is no doubt that an infant whether co-sleeping or sleeping in a crib next to parents in the same room ( as in may case), they both receive that "comfort" at night. My sisiter-in-law had her children in a separate room with a night light but as soon as she heard the slightest whimper she would check. I don't think her infant felt abandoned because she knew her mom would be there for her. I don't see this as a concern but only going back to safety issue and being too attached. Jamie I can understand that having your infant spend as much time as she can is improtant to you because your husband will be leaving for a long time. I'm genuinely happy for you and I am sure you are both being careful. Everyone is different. I'm a heavy sleeper so I know I won't be good at it. When I was about 5 years old, there were a few times that I felt alone sleeping in a separate room. So in the middle of the night in the dark, I would quietly, walk down the hall through the kitchen to sleep with my parents. There was no room at the top so I would sleep at the bottom where their legs were. I realized it was better to sleep on my own because it was uncomfortable in their bed. So I understand that cosleeping sometimes maybe needed. I cannot see how it benefits long term but only that children get too attached and making the transition to sleep independlety will take longer. Not that its wrong. It's cute. It reminds me of a different attachment like Charlie Brown with his blanket.