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Joker I felt the exact same way about dying on the operating table. I would have rather died than to lost my uterus. Funny isn't. I was prepared for anything.

Hello everyone thanks again for the response. Joker you nailed it right on the head everything you mentioned is exactly what I am feeling. Sometimes it doesn't feel real. Thinking back on how many times I saw a negative pregnancy test and broke down in tears just makes me laugh (husband and I tried from Feb. 2006 to Aug... got pregnant at the end of Aug. 2007). If I only knew that there was something far worse going to happen in my future... the loss of my child. I feel like eveyone around me is moving on with life and I am stuck having to make this decision. I want to move on as well but I am really scared. Joker and Angel I don't want to die but the worst possible thing that can happen is I loose my uterus (emergency hysterectomy or i spike a fever and loose it after the surgery.. if that can happen) My husband tells to not to worry and to have faith that all will be ok.. but I can't. Somedays I am all for the surgery and know that it's the best choice for me but then the fear kicks in full force and I get scared. I spoke with a Dr. on the phone on Friday (my pastors dr... he referred her to the man who performed her myomectomy.. they work together). I asked him some questions about my options and he said the Dr. I am going to meet with on Thursday is a great Dr. he's performed plenty of myomectomies and he has over 19 years of experience with fibroids and surgery. That made me feel so much better. Joker I understand what you mean when you talk about leg surgery. It's not the same but if something needs correction it's best to get it done than suffer. Another positive of the surgery is they can look and remove all of the fibroids even the ones that are not seen on the ultrasound. Also, unless the fibroid grows back you won't have to worry about that crippling fibroid pain we all have experienced at one time in our pregnancy. I know I have and I wouldn't wish that pain on my worst enemy. Thank you all for reading.. listening. Since the loss of Makayla (my daughter) I on;y have a handfull of people I can talk to about this without them interrupting or changing the subject to speak about themselves. God Bless. Keep trying and never give up on your dream of having a baby.

KM you are going to be ok girl. You are. And you are going to be such a blessing to others because of all of the struggles you have been through. AND most importantly you are going to be a mom!! You are. I can imagine that Makayla and my Joseph are playing in Heaven right now together and when we get there we will get to hold them. I do not know you but I feel your pain because it is my pain too. Hugs!!!!! You are going to be amazed at what the Lord is going to do for you. Joker thanks for this thread. We owe you girl!!

Angel you are right. We will be mothers all of us and we will get to hold our children when we get to heaven. God is testing our faith. WE have to trust in him through the good and the bad. It's hard I know for me because it took so long to get pregnant and to have made it that far just to loose her it's terrible. Angel thank you for the response I know you had to face these same decisions and I believe you chose wisely. As did the rest of you ladies. Joker we do owe you for starting this thread. After I left the hospital I was so confused. I was looking to see if this happened to anyone else. We are told that fibroids may not effect pregnancy so when this happens you feel all alone... and of course more than likely none of your friends or family members have experienced a loss due to fibroids (I know mine haven't). Just to be able to hear (read) other womens stories of strength some going on to have sucessful pregnancies, some going for the surgery, some ttc and those who are undecided. Just a place where we can all talk openly and freely about the our experiences without being ignored or judged has made all the difference in my life. I wish the best for all of you ladies. You have truly changed my life forever.

Joker you are so right I felt the same way. I told my self there was no way i was going to live knowing I didn't have a uterus. Isn't that what makes you a woman .I know not everybody agrees with that but thats how I felt then and i so wanted to still be able to have a baby I would hav given up everything. With me it was even worse cause my fibroid was so big and when it was time to sign the release papers for the surgery right there in black and white was myo possible histerotomy I frecked out told my dr I wasn't signing that paper with that on it and she was like its just in case. No there was no just in case with my uterus told her if she opened me up and find out she cant do it without taking my uterus out to just patch me back up and leave me alone i was willing to sign that of cause all that now is history I had a wonderful Md I thank God for her every day... KM I actually tried for the 2nd time with the fibroids they were not that big after my 1st m/c and this was after seeing 3 doctors who all told me to go aheard only 1 in so many pple end up having a m/c which I did become the 1 of cause and after reading everybody's story here they need to change thier numbers i think. If I had happened upon this thread I think i would have done things different. The final decision is your but I was there it is not something i would wish on my enermy even. Sorry for going on and on. I just get carried aways sometimes cause i know you girls understand exactly what I am saying or trying to say. Thank you to every single one of you. Thank you

Joker, we did Clomid to stimulate egg production and we did sonograms to see if it was working (on day 10 to see how many follicles). There were always 3-4. When we started IUIs, my husband's count was lowER than most. He started taking "Fertility Blend for Men" from GNC and it quadrupled his count the next round. The IUI (insimination/turkey baster) will help with low sperm count and will still work if you are on Clomid. I started on 25mg of clomid and worked up to 150mg before we saw a difference. I am officially off of blood thinners!!! YEAH!!!! So, now we just do the HSG and then try right afterwards. HOWEVER, I was supposed to start last Thursday and she is NO WHERE to be seen!! I am ALWAYS on time...day 28 like clockwork...and I have never wanted her to show up SO much, and of course she is late. What the heck?!?!?!? I will keep you posted on when I have the HSG. Never thought I would say this...but "come on aunt flow"...

KKMS congrats on getting off of the blood thinners!!! Hopefully AF will show up soon so you can get the show rolling. I did IUI's to get my BFP's - one was Feb 2007 and the other was Aug 2007. My dh and I both checked out ok and we have been cla__sified as unexplained infertility. Are you going to do the IUI's again with clomid?

We are going to start with just clomid to be sure I am ovulating. I had HUNDREDS of pea sized fibroids in my uterus. My Dr said that there was NO WAY anything could implant and he was SURE I was getting pregnant each month, they just didnt stick. So, I am hopeful that the myo fixed the problems! Now that we are both "working" properly it should work. Just pray hard!!

KKMS I will be praying for you. Just this morning I was praying for all of us and asking God to bless us and to reveal Himself to us in our "valley". Come on AF for KKMS so she can start the clomid.

hi everyone! i have been following this thread and part 1 of it for a while now and I am always encouraged by everone's determination. I have never been pregnant and never wanted any kids till this young gynae told me bluntly i needed to get my fibroids removed or i will never get pregnant. I changed doctors and now suffer frm infertility complex, belive me its a lot harder here as I am asian. At 32, on apr06 i had my myomectomy and had 17 fibroids removed, largest one being 8 cm and had 2 packs of blood transfusion due to blood loss. The number of fibroids were shocking to know about becoz during v____al scans, they saw abt 4 to 5. Post surgery, the report on my tubes were "Both tubes looked normal". told to ttc after 6mths. I had my v____al scan done 6mths post-op and the fibroids ahve started growing back but they were only abt 2mm and "wont affect fertility". After a year of trying, was transfered to the fertility clinic and took my HSG test and was told both mytubes were blocked!! one by a fibroid and the other just shut tight. They pumped so much saline in me to try to clear the tubes, it was painful becoz i didnt see the need to take painkillers. After being told my tubes were blocked, i sobbed there in the examination room. The nurse asked me if it was becoz of the pain of the procedure, I told her no. It was becoz both my tubes were blocked. I was angry and frustrated. Why were my tubes not checked or cleared during my myo? apparently, during myo, the surgeon only sights them, they dont perform HSG during myo. THEY SHOULD! anyway, the rest of my story is that hubby had his sperm test later and he has slight spermatozoa. Any idea how to improve his sperm samples? I may want to buy those GNC pills for him as recommended by KKMS. during HSG, they were able to see my fibroids clearer (i think) and grew to become 3cm and there are abt 3 of them. the doc told me that she sees no point in clearing my tubes and she scheduled me for hysterscopy to get rid of a polyp and then start IVF program. I have been having too much bad news for 2yrs. I just want to have my own kids so bad it is affecting my life. but, thanks for listening. Everyone around me keeps getting pregnant and once my relatives knew I had fertility problem, they dont nag me to start a family anymore..they just dont talk abt it to me. I hate Chinese new year gatherings.

ZIPPYBUNNY...my Dr. flushed my tubes during surgery, but still required an HSG after a few months. The scar tissue from the surgery can build up and block the tubes that were JUST opened during surgery. My Dr said that if my tubes are blocked for my HSG, then we would go straight to InVitro. ANGELKITTY, that was the best prayer EVER!!! Nothing like being specific with exactly what we want!! All the prayers are appreciated! Still nothing, and still waiting!

Oh, and about improving sperm sample...those pills worked GREAT (there is also a "fertility blend for women" in case anyone doesnt want to do regular fertility pills). My husband's count was up and down, but those pills def. made the count better. Also be sure to HAVE s_x w/in 7 days of the count but NOT for 3 days before. It's a tricky time schedule and you might have to play with it for a few months. Also, have him drink LOTS of water the day before and the day of the "drop." If he is sick it may be low. Even when mine's were lower or slower the Dr. always said it is a day to day thing with men, so they were never worried. Once they saw what he was capable of, they didnt worry if there were less or something else wrong. Men produce more everyday...somedays may just be slower!! We did 6 IUIs, so we had 6 times to study his sperm patterns. Trial and error...sucks, but works. If anyone in the the DFW, TX area, I have a GREAT Dr. Good luck!

Hi all!! Thanks Joker for this new forum! I am sorry to hear how hard and long it has been for some of us this trying to get pregnant thing. And I felt the same as you do, until today when the new arrived that I AM PREGNANT. Yes girls, pregnancy after myomectomy exists!! it´s hard but it exists, I was really thinking that I wouldn´t make it, but three weeks ago a book called The Secret caught my attention. I ready it and it encouraged me to think positive, to think that I was going to make it. To visualize it, etc, etc. I know it sounds awkward but when I was in "that moment" I kept imagining a sperm fertilizing an egg. Don´t laugh, I thought I was becoming crazy also but somehow it worked! I had a delay of one week, then I tried the evatest and it showed two very slight stripes. I was not sure and my husband kept saying that I was imaging them, so today I went to the doctor, had a blood test and guess what? the doctor called me telling I was pregnant to go to see him on Friday. I am so emotioned that I couldn´t even breath. It´s worth trying girls! I had been what most of you had been through and got discouraged, encouraged, happy, sad, and in almost all states, but it is possible, so please don´t loose your hope, the mind makes miracles. Hope I am giving hope to all of you with this post.

Damajuana, congrats girl! I am so happy for you. I wish you a happy and healthy 9 months. I will be praying for you. Baby dust to all!!

Thank you Hopeful! I have to wait until Friday to see if everything is OK, but this is a start!. Hope they make me an ultrasound, not sure yet. Let´s see what the doctor tells me to do. And baby dust to you all!

Damajuana...It's Sasha...I'm sitting here crying tears of joy for you and your husband and your BIG FAT PREGNANCY results!!!!!!! I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy for you girl!!!!!! God is awesome!!!!! I will be praying that your ultrasound exam goes exceedingly well!!!!! Please if you can...take us (and those who are new to the thread) on a brief reintroduction of your journey...with the fibroids and pregnancy. In other words, please share your story so that we can continue hoping!!! This will be our third attempt in a week and I will also have positive thoughts and hopes like you going forward. Just this morning when cleaning the kitchen I was thinking that I need to focus more on positive thoughts about getting pregnant. I can't wait to have this same news as you hopefully soon!!! It will be fun hearing your pregnancy journey in the next 9 months! :) Sasha~