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I fell pregnant when I was 19, my very second try of intercource. I wanted to keep the baby and my bf who I'm still with, who was 17 at the time, did not, So I went to my father and told him, he said At first I'll support you, and then 4 months down the track I was pressured into an abortion. I've been depressed ever since my traumatic experience. and too make it worse my bf's bother's gf was pregant also, and I didn't know, she had a baby boy two weeks before I was due. and Everytime I see my bf affectionate with his nefew, It makes me sad and angry. and it also makes me feel bad about my baby to be. Im 23 now and all my siblings are now parents and also his brother has 2 more, even though he's younger then me. All I want is to be is a parent more then anything in this world, but everyone is telling me to live my life the way they think it should be like a yahoo, I don't drink, I don't go out, and I feel everyone is looking down at me like im a 15 year old without a clue. This hurts my feelings, But I don't plan on being 30 when I have my first child as I feel that is too unhealthly for your body. I love my bf as I've stuck by him though four years. Four years on secretly crying, and I'm begining to resent him. I can't talk about it with him, as he doesn't want to hear it. And everyone here I talk to about it says what about his feelings, Well what about mine. I don't hear him crying every night, dealing with a loss, so My question is should I cut my loss and do what my heart wants, stuff everyone else and have my child?
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